Answers! DAMMIT I WANT ANSWERS
by 1950'sTV-Family
Summary: Simple. Send me questions, and I throw them back at you and make you laugh so hard you liver will come out of your ear, or any orifice of your choice. Reborn and everything! ...I made so many typos! Finally finished the sub plot!
1. Hakkyou, insanity and craziness

Alright! For the second time, I'm remaking my story! This one will have to work though, because I completely deleted the other one! Once again, I will be having Shadow in my show-er, fanfic...yeah, let's go with that.

ONWARDS!!

* * *

Two figures are walking down a street, one of them is tall, the other is of normal height. If not a bit short. The two were headed towards a large house. They reached the driveway fence, and there the cameras picked them up...

R.O.B: ATTENTION. ATTENTION. UNKNOWN PERSON(s) APPROACHING GATE. ATTENTION. ATTENTION. UNKNOWN-

Fox: Shut _up_ ROB, god.  
The vulpine turns a key on a large panel, it was connected to a sort of computer, but it showed the status of the house, not videos of people doing retarded stuff. Or something like that.

Fox: Okay, let's see what we've got here...

There were two figures on the cameras live feed- one of them was was pulling at the bars, the other was doing some weird hand gestures...

Fox: WHAT FRESH HELL?!

The figure doing weird hand gestures hand just shoved his palm at the gate- and it flew off!...With the other person hanging on...

??: SHADOW!! WHAT THE HEEEELLL?!

Shadow: It's your fualt! You were hanging onto the gate- I told you to let go!! God Hakkyou, you're such an idiot!

Hakkyou: I'm not an idiot...he is  
Hakkyou points at the frog that was standing near them.

Shadow: DON'T STEAL MY LINES!!

Hakkyou: Chill!!Chill!! Peace! You must know peeeeaaaaace!!

Shadow:..._sigh_ Fine, just don't do it again, okay?

Hakkyou: Hah! That's as easy to remember as once seeing...Hm, I don't remember. Whatever!  
Hakkyou starts strolling towards the house.

Shadow: I really don't know how you managed to convince me to do this...

Hakkyou: Something to do with helping you with a show...

Shadow: SILENCE!!

Falco: You two really are a sad lot on this night.

Hakkyou looks quickly at Falco  
Hakkyou: Is that a gun you're holding...?

Falco: No, it's a tooth brush...

Shadow: Oh, well, that's really too ba- EAT RASENGAN!!

Falco is hit in the face with a swirling ball of chakra, sending him flying into a window.

Slippy: NOOOO!! THE T.V!!

Hakkyou: You can use your colorful aura stuff, I'll stick to explosives

Shadow: How many times do I have to tell you- IT'S CHAKRA!!

Hakkyou and Shadow enter the building

??: Hold it right there!

??:...Where did they go?

Hakkyou: Kon bon wa, Fox!

Fox: WHAT FRESH HELL?!

Hakkyou: Oi oi oi, mate, mate. Matey mate with mate on top and a side dish of MATE. That's my line.

Shadow: Shut up Hakkyou  
Shadow hits Hakkyou over the head with some chakra

Hakkyou: Ow-ow-ow-ow that stuff hurts, god dammit!

Krystal:...Wait...I remember you!  
Krystal points at Shadow

Fox: Yeah! You made us play truth, dare or strip!

Falco: THE T.V!!

Hakkyou: Oops.

Shadow: Oh, hey guys...

Fox: So...who is that? The short guy?

Hakkyou: SHUT UP!! I am NOT SHORT!!

Shadow: Yes, you are

Hakkyou: I hate you, I really do...

Fox: So, I guess you're here to make us do that again, huh?

Shadow: well, no-

Hakkyou: Nope! I'm here to ask you questions! Well, not me really, people send us questions and we answer them!

Fox:...So, why aren't you asking any?

Shadow: Because he recently switched to koodo mobile!

Hakkyou: As I said, we need people to send us questions. Not bread, DO YOU UNDERSTAND? Good.

Falco: Hands off my bread!

Shadow: Don't try me!

Fox: Please, don't Falco...

Hakkyou: Hmm...wanna get a drink?

Fox:...Are you old enough?

Hakkyou: I meant normal drinks...

Fox: Meh, why not?

Shadow: Oi! Hakkyou, be nice kid and bring me some vodka, would you?

Hakkyou: I AM OT A BUTLER!! I DON'T BUTTLE!!

Fox: Let's just go get some drinks...

Krystal: I'm gonna go to!

Shadow: HAHA! I HAVE THE BREAD!!

Falco: GET BACK HERE!!

The two run into a random corridor

Slippy: Hey guys!

Hakkyou: Go die, your fat and no one likes you. You're a disgrace to the entire team of Star Fox.

Slippy: Okay! See ya laaater!

Hakkyou: And you have to work woith him?!

Fox: Tell me about it  
He is messaging his temples

Krystal: I think he watches me while I sleep...

Fox: Wait, you always say that people are gonna send in the questions- how do they even know what's going on?  
Hakkyou: I set up some cameras when I walked in.

Fox: WHAT?! How is that even possible?!

Hakkyou: There must be at least 372...

Krystal: HE'S NOT LYING!! I SEE ONE NOW!!

Falco: GET BACK HERE WITH MY BREAD!!  
Hakkyou throws a vase at him, which knocks him over.

Shadow: Yeash! The bread is mine!  
Shadow eats the bread triumphantly

Fox: What about Falco?! Is he okay?!

Hakkyou: Perfectly fine, I set up a device around the perimeter of the house that makes it so you won't sustain injuries but you'll still feel it. And I can make it be more painful for people.

Shadow: OI!! THAT'S MY IDEA!!

Hakkyou: Do you _really_ mind?

Shadow: YES!! I DO!!

Hakkyou: Rrrrgh, can't you let it slide just once?

Shadow: Hmph. Fine, I'll let you get away _this time, _but don't let it happen again!

Hakkyou: Kaaaaay!

Krystal: You're a cute little boy!

Hakkyou: I'M NOT CUTE GOD DAMMIT!! I'M NOT LITTLE EITHER!!RRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!  
Hakkyou starts throwing lit dynamite at Falco

Falco:Saywhat?!-

**BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM**

Hakkyou is drinking green tea with Fox, Krystal and Shadow. Slippy is undoubtedly round the corner watching Krystal, and Falco is recovering from the pain he felt but didn't really happen to him.

Hakkyou:(sip) I love tea, I really do!

Fox and Shadow are drinking coffee.

Shadow: That;s because you're a girly man...(sip)

Hakkyou: Oi! Mate, mate. Matey mate with mate on top and a side dish of MATE. I'm British- piss off.

Krystal: LANGUAGE!!

Hakkyou: What am I, some sort of prep child for you and Fox?

Fox and Krystal: Wh...what?!

Shadow: He'll do that sometimes...(sip)

Falco: Hands...off...my...Bread!

Hakkyou: ...Do you mind if I kill you?  
I start beating up Falco with two conveniently placed tonfas.

Shadow: Well, seeing as though Hakkyou is busy, I'll see you lot off! Be sure to send all your questions, and check out my Q&A fic too, HINT HINT. KEEP IMPRESSING ME!!  
Shadow does a thumbs up and smile at the camera  


* * *

I really really _really_ just need you guys to  
send me questions, kay? I'll be your best  
bud if you do, and give you chocolate,  
and biscuits with jam on them, and toast,  
and tea, etc. I'm Counting on you guys!  
S'later.


	2. Starfoxluver Appears!

Well, here I am again. And the war continues...on my part...yaay...sorry, I'm tired. Ish  
Anyways, I don't really have many questions at all, so I'm gonna make up some myself.  
I know this kinda...actually, no, I'm not gonna. So, Onwards!!  


* * *

  
After beating Falco up throughly, Hakkyou returns to the others. They had long since moved to the lounge, and were lounging. But, it seems that they had unexpected visitors...

Hakkyou: Eh? Katt? Bill? Fay? Fara? Peppy? General Pepper? What are you all doing here?

Shadow: I invited them!

Hakkyou: Oh...can we get rid of the old farts?

Shadow: Sure! May I?  
Hakkyou: I wouldn't hold you back from it..

Shadow: Alright, Peppy, Pepper- come here would you?

Peppy and Pepper: YOUNGIN!

Shadow: SURPRISE RASENGAN TO THE FACES!!

Shadow hit them each in the face with a rasengan from both hands. The General and Peppy were sent flying.

Fox: OH MY GOD!!

Krystal:...Slippy, what are you doing behind the couch?...!

Falco: I'm back

Shadow: That was almost as fun as the time I shot a fat guy and the started stabbing him!

Hakkyou: It...must have been...

Bill:...The, HEEEELL'S goin on here?!

Katt: Oooooooooooooooi! Krystal!

Krystal: Katt! What's up?

Hakkyou: Well, Shadow, got any questions for the crew?

Shadow: I can ask questions?

Hakkyou: Well, yeah, I mean, you _did_, make that rule...

Shadow: Right well, here they come!

Shadow: To Krystal, Since your fur is blue, does that mean your insides are as well?

Krystal: Hmm...Well, it might mean that, but I can't really check...

Fox: Well, someone could look in your mouth, and if it's blue, then that answers his question!

Krystal: And let me guess, you wanna volunteer?

Fox: Wh-uh, what?!

All: ahahahahahahaha

Hakkyou: Alright! We'll do what Fox said! Krystal, open your mouth!

Krystal opens her mouth

Fox: OH MY GOD!?

Hakkyou: WHAT FRESH HELL!?

Shadow: Eew...It's reminiscent of a cross between bile and tires...

Falco: Whoa, who knew that Krystal was so gross on the inside?

All: GAY!!

Falco: NOT LIKE THAT

Katt: Yes. Just like that.

Slippy: I like it

All: ...

Hakkyou: Please, ask another question Shadow, I think I'm gonna throw up...

Shadow: To Fox, Do you think your dad would approve of your doing this in this fic and in mine?

Fox: Well, I don't really know...The only reason I agree to this kind of stuff is because my dad liked them, and I usually do like them, unless someone does them badly...I mean, this one is okay, but...kinda...Hakkyou?

Hakkyou is in the corner of despair

Krystal: I think he's sensitive about his writing...

Hakkyou: I'M NOT SENSITIVE GO DAMMIT!! I HATE YOU FALCO!!

Hakkyou pulls out the tonfas again and starts beating up Falco...AGAIN

Bill:...The HEEELL'S goin on here?!

Fay: Wow, I only just spoke...

Katt: Chatter chatter

Krystal: Gossip gossip

Fara: BITCH BITCH BITCH

Fox: I...I think you should just continue...

Shadow: Kay. To starfoxluver: Why are you outnumbering us?! This was supposed to be a three way war, and now it's blown out of proportions, even though it'll be a lot more fun. Anyway, Hakkyou and I aren't going to let you beat us. Same to all of you who have teamed up against us!

There is suddenly a blinding light and the air begins to thrum maddeningly with energy, and with a great BANG, the light disappeared, an there, in the after glow of the dimension rip, stood starfoxluver.

Hakkyou: So, it's you

Starfoxluver: Yeah, and guess what?

Shadow: What could you possibly have to tell us that you couldn't have just send a message to say?

Starfoxluver: I'M GONNA WIN!!

Hakkyou: YOU'RE CHEATING!! YOU HAVE A HEAD START!!

Shadow: And you're recruiting people to help you!...Maybe! Well, actually, yes.

Starfoxluver:...Good points...later!

Starfoxluver spreads his arms out, and he disappears in a blast of blinding white light that almost made Hakkyou and Shadow fall over (Falco, Bill, Slippy and Fara went flying), and with another immense BANG, it disappeared.

Hakkyou brushes some dust off of his arm.

Hakkyou: Well, that wasn't very nice!

Shadow: Although, you gotta hand it to him; he's got style...

??:AAAAAAAAAAAACK!!

A lone grey figure falls through the ceiling, and lands on a couch.

All: WOLF?!

Wolf: Aaah, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO THINKING?!...Huh?

Wolf looks out the window. Two figures are seen running away.

Wolf: They ditched me here! Bastards...

Hakkyou: I would like you all to welcome...Wolf O'Donnell!

Applause

Wolf: So...W-

Fox: I'll explain the situation to you-

Wolf: I already know. He explained it to me.

Wolf Points at Hakkyou

Fox: Oh

Shadow: Are we done here? I'm tired...

Hakkyou: Yeah, let's go sleep...S'later!

Fox:Er, night...

Wolf:...aren't they gonna take your beds...?

Star Fox Crew: SHIT!!

Not Star Fox Crew(Excluding Wolf): We'll go to a hotel or something...

Wolf: I'll sleep on the ouch or something...

Fox(far away): We have guest rooms!

The not Star Fox crew all look at each other, then they start scrambling for the door.  


* * *

Well, this one isn't much good, but that's because I need more questions...SO GIVE ME SOME!!  
Just do it.


	3. The two Cerberi and a stripping Bill

Well, I haven't done this for a while..  
But I feel the idiocy flowing through me!  
SO GET READY!!!!!!!!!....Ready? Kaaaay!  
(see what I meant about idiocy?See?SEE?SEE?!?!)

Hakkyou: Well, what a wonderful sleep I had. It is now morning.

(Sun rises)

Krystal: Morning Hakkyou...

Hakkyou: Morning Krystal, Slippy...

Krystal: Slippy? But he's not here-

(Slippy jumps out of Krystal shirt, leaving her gibbering on the floor)

Fox: Oh, hey...

Hakkyou: Hey..

Wolf:....My feet are cold

Falco: Hands off my bread!

All(sans Falco): SILENCE

Hakkyou: And now for questions! Oh, right, Shadow had to leave, his Q&A fic is flying on its own....Oh well, First! The Lammynator!  
Remember him? Huh?... NO?! THE HELL!?!?!?

(Lammy appears from a door that was floating parallel to the ground)

Lammy: Hey, what's up Hakkyou?

Hakkyou: Nothing much, so, fire away.

Lammy: I only have the one, but okay.  
To Everyone: Who's going to fix the hole in the ceiling?

Fox: Falco  
Falco:Fox  
Wolf:The green shit  
Krystal:Slippy  
Bill:Fara...The HELL'S goin on here?!  
Fara:Katt  
Slippy:Me!  
Hakkyou:The ugly wart. AKA Slippy.

Lammy:...Ooookaaaaaayyyyy......Er, BAMBOOZLED!!!!

(Disappears in a puff of glitter and exploding jelly worms)

Hakkyou:...Wow, I can't believe that just happened...

Fox: Who's next? That wasn't so bad!

Hakkyou: next is...Velk...he/she's anonymous, so it's really all the same.

(AnonVelk appears)

AV: Hay, wut is up? I wanted to ask: cristal, hu do you like best? Me, panther, or fox?  
To Kristil:if me come by room 624 floor 24 ps i have some food for you and me.  
To Fox: ask Shadow for my S.H.I.P. MWAHAHAHAHAHHAAA

All:...

Krystal:Er, thanks...right...uh, Fox, obviously..and, no, I would not go by room 624 floor 24 to eat food with you. I doubt it's food that you'd want to eat.

Katt: BURN!!!

Fox: Er, well, Shadow is kinda busy...I might get to it...after finding out the the freshly cut cucumber a S.H.I.P. is....

Hakkyou: Bill, escort him out of the house.

Bill: Okay!(ness)

(jumps at Velk)

(Velk jumps too, the background scenery becomes all cool)

Velk: I AM NOT MEANT FOR DIE. YOU ARE MEANT FOR DIE!

Bill: FALCON PUNCH!!!!

Velk:WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh.......

Hakkyou: Moving on! What's this? Is that Cloud there in a dress? Oh, no, it's Kitetheblade! How are you?

Kite: I'm fine, you know, data drain about 20 times a day, killing Magus, Innus, and Skeith, especially.

Hakkyou: An interesting life you lead, Kite. Now, if you would please step forward and ask your questions...

Kite: Alright! First!

To Wolf: Are you gay? (Obvious question ^^)

Wolf: Gasp! How did you find out about my flaming homosexuality?! That was supposed to be revealed later on! PLOT SPOILERS!!!!!!!

Kite: To Fox: Are you gay? (second obvious question ^^)

Fox: WHAT THE FLIPPING DUCKS?! HOW DO YOU FIND THESE THINGS OUT!!! CREEPER IN MY CLOSET, CREEPER IN MY CLOSET!!!!

Falco: Actually, you were just removed from your closet, so..

Bill: Oooooooh, snap!

Hakkyou: DIE!!!

(Throws a frying pan at Falco)

Hakkyou: Anyone else wanna make fun of gayness...?!?!?!?!??!

All:No!

Hakkyou: Then victory is mine...Er, I mean, that ends it....

Kite:....Continuing...To Wolf&Fox: Have you two seen how many fics you've been in together as a couple?

Wolf: No, I don't read Fanfiction.

Fox: Yes, I try to get Wolf to read them, but...

Fara&KRYSTAL: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! OUR UNMADE CHILDREN!!! WHO WILL BEAR OUR CHILDS?!??!

Krystal: Oops, sorry, "who's child will we bear"

Fara: Much better

Bill: There's enough Bill to go around...

(Bill begins to strip.)

Hakkyou: Shadow, would you Rasengan- Oh, right.....Hmmm....Cerberus will take him down...

All: Vincent's gun?!

Hakkyou: No, I mean the three headed dog.

( A cerberus appears)

Hakkyou: Although, the gun is a good idea.

(Pulls Vincent's gun, Cerberus, out of his sleeve)

Hakkyou: NOW DIE FOR SOLICITING YOURSELF!!!! KILL HIM CERBERUS!!!!

(Begins shooting at him while the giant three headed dog tries to kill him)

Wolf: Huh? Well, Hakkyou is busy, so send us all questions, and make sure they come from the very back of your mind: no question is too dirty!..Espescially for Falco! Sorry, I meant Fucko!

Fox: Wolf, come on, I'm bored. Let's play chess.

Wolf: CHESS!! YEAAAAAH!!!!!

(Starts throwing chess pieces at everyone)


	4. The Harbinger of Montanah

Okay, looks like people have re-noticed it.  
And Shadow, I haven't really cut you  
from my story, but I prefer the whole  
'guest interviewer' thing. Fine? Kay.

ONWARDS BITCHEZ!!!!!  


* * *

"Ow! I got a rook in my eye!" "There's a king in my nose, THERE'S A KING IN MY NOSE!!"

The audience started screaming and running from Wolf's chess pieces. Everyone stopped to think.

Fox: Wait, weren't we in our-

Hakkyou: THAT QUESTION IS INERT.

(Slaps Fox to the ground)

Fox: What the fuck?!

Hakkyou: Would you rather me cut you from the knees down? Then I won't be so short...

Wolf: Won't make much difference

Bill:Oooooh-

Falco(Sorry, Fucktard, I mean :P): Snap!

Hakkyou: Whatever. Bring them in!

( A white robed man falls through the ceiling, which had been recently plastered by Slippy)

Slippy: Aww! Now I have to do it again!

Nobody cared.

Kris: Hey, how's it going? And why am I in these...?

Hakkyou:...Uh, I think something may have happened...But, never mind that, put on this hat and ask the questions.

(Hakkyou gives Kris a pointy white hat. Kris promptly refuses)

Kris: Alright. To Fox: RAPE WOLF! I mean... WOULD YOU RAPE WOLF FOR 5 DOLLARS?!

Fox: W-uh, no, uh...No. No I would not rape Wolf for five dollars.

Wolf: He'd probly pay to have me rape him, though.

Fox: WHAT?!

Falco: Gay.

Bill(Snape voice): Obviously.

Kris: That was a horrible answer. To Krystal: HOLLA FOR A DOLLAR!...then STRIP for a DOLLAR! I mean...WOULD YOU STRIP FOR A DOLLAR?!

Krystal: FLIP YEAH! HOLY FRESHLY KUT KUKUMBERS- I MIGHT EVEN HAVE AN BABY!!!

Kris: That is an answer! A kool answer! To Falco: FUKK YOU! I mean, WOULD YOU FUKK YOU?!

Falco:...Do I...Do I kill you?

Kris: To Hakkyou: HAKKYOU!!! I mean...WOULD YOU HAKK YOURSELF?!

Hakkyou:...Uh, explain 'hakk', and we'll talk...Either way, thanks for koming! SEkURITY!!!

(Two large less than 3's appear and karry Kris away. Don't ask me, it's the sekurity system)

Hakkyou: I'll always remember how he left on chapter 16 on Interview with Starfox...And now! All of you have been dying to see him- SHADOW!!!

(A large explosion occurs, and Shadow appears from the midst of it, smiling like a retard. Except he isn't a retard, just a flaming idiot.)

Shadow: What?! TAKE IT BACK! TAKE IT BACK!!!

Hakkyou: it was only a joke! Chill....

Shadow: I HAVE QUESTIONS AND I DEMAND THEM TO BE ANSWERED!! Oh, right, forget to mention it, Hakkyou, you might be co-hosting on my Q&A if you want to.

Hakkyou: Sweet! I accept.

Shadow: now onto matters even more important than Captain Falcon's masculinity: QUESTIONS!!!!  
P.S, he doesn't hace masculinity.

Shadow: First, To Hakkyou: Why you...Fighting poses! (Eye of the tiger starts playing, and they begin to Kung-Fu fight ((I'm only doing this...I don't know why, but I don't like Kung-Fu fighting...))

(Hakkyou stops fighitng for amoment, in deep thought.)

Hakkyou: Hold on a sec, I know I have it somewhere...

(Hakkyou searches his pockets while Shadow looks on impatiently)

Hakkyou: Aha! Masamune!

(Hakkyou pulls Masamune ((Sephiroth's sword) out of his right jeans pocket, and faces Shadow)

Shadow: I still have chakra!

(epic battle)  
(Sephiroth music from Crisis Core starts playing)

Shadow: To Wolf and Fox!: Not...Cool guys! HA! I'm gonna...Talk to SFL about-RASENGAN!- that un-gayifier! DIE!!

Fox: ...Uh, we were being sarcastic...

Wolf: You think I'd like him? Or anyone, for that matter? Bah! Love is for the weak! Fuck you, Dumbledore!

(Slippy broke out into tears)

(Leon and Panther fall through the ceiling, once more crushing Slippy's dreams)

Leon: What the hell's going on here?! Why are they fighting?!

Panther: Panther sees women. Must, sex, WOMEN!!!

Fox: EVERYONE- that means all the girls, RUN FOR YOUR VIRGINITY!!! BUT NOT REALLY CUZ YOU'RE ALL HO-BAGS!!

(The girls run away, along with Panther chasing after them hornily. I don' think they'll be back till next chapter)

Hakkyou: Perish.

(Hakkyou holds his hand up, then points it at Shadow. Giant meteors crash towards Shadow, who dodges and asks a question)

Shadow: To Fara&Krystal!: Ahem...(stops in mid-fight) Right here. You get the drill, maybe. When it finally crosses your minds, I'll be waiting in the bedroom(s) with whipped cream.  
Giggity. (Shadow puts his head back and forth at the running girls, then returns to the battle, Hakkyou descending at him quickly)

Hakkyou: Damn, if only that had taken two giggities longer! (Shadow jumps out of the way just in time)

Shadow: To Bill: I swear... If you if you bring it up, something very bad will happen... Involving a plunger and a lot of pain in the rectum due to the logging company.

Bill: I didn't plan on 'it'... whatever 'it' is... Have anything to do with guns and viscous liquids?

Falco: Gay.

All: SHUT THE FRESHLY CUT CUCUMBER UP FALCO!

Bill( In the back): The heeelllllll's goin on here?!

( Hakkyou pulled out a series of sword slashes, eventually bringing the blade down into a quickly made Rasengan. Hakkyou is slowly taken from the ground, but breaks the contact. After doing a back flip, he stops to let Shadow ask some more questions)

Shadow: To Everyone: Do you play guitar hero? _______________________________________( THis is all irrelavent :D)

All: Sometimes, not much though...

Slippy: The blood of a thousand peoples lay on my hands alone!

All:...

Shadow: uh....yeah..To...Hakkyou: Now that I'm here...RASENGAN!!! (Hits Bill in the face, sending him flying into the newly bought Television)

Falco: T.V? T.V?! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nobody cared. Much. They felt for the Television, but not for Falco. Sorry, Fucko. :D

Shadow: Let's end this!

Hakkyou: About time.

( Hakkyou and Shadow dash frowards, Shadow creates a blade of chakra covering his arm; Hakkyou prepared Masamune. The two clashed, and a shock wave toppled all of the question-ees. They broke contact, and exchanged blows that were quickening, becoming more violent and desperate at the same rate. Hakkyou jumped at Shdaow, hit him around seven times, the seventh, although blocked, brought him into the air, and Hakkyou ((somehow) fell from above, gathering speed, and slicing at Shadow: He blocked it, but still was hurt. They both slumped a bit)

Hakkyou: I'm... gonna.. kill you!

Shadow: I'll do it.. First!

(They both collapse, the 'soul leaving the body' manga bubble at their mouths.)

Shadow(Sitting up): That was fun.

Hakkyou: We should have mroe intense battles.

Shadow: Agreed. To All: I'm watching you..So don't try anything!...I'm warning you... Keep impressing me! See ya later.

Hakkyou: Later.

(Shadow fades away)

Fox:...That took forever! WHAT THE HELL?!

Katt: Who's next?

Falco: No, whore's next! Get it? Get it?

All:....

Falco:....Fine..

Hakkyou: Well, that's it for this chapter, I guess-

Velk: You forgot about me! Dude, uncool. To Everyone (You DON't say 'All', that's my shtick): (Pulls out a bazooka) DIE!! By the way, I'm a guy!

(Fires the bazooka at Hakkyou, who lazily slices it down the middle, both parts exploding behind him. Cuz it works that way.)

Hakkyou: Well, that was that, although, I think I got more screen time than all of you...Just a reminder ( to me): FOCUS ON CHARACTERS!! Later!

Fox:...Teach me how to do all that!

Wolf: I want exlpsives, too.

Falco:...Waa! No ones paying attention to- **Just ignore him**.

Katt: Chatter chatter

Krystal: Gossip gossip

Fara:...IT CROSSED MY MIND!!!

(runs to Shadow's room)

(Slippy continues to lament his shattered hopes)

Bill:...I'm all right...I'm fine...just a t.v, nothign to worry about...

Leon: whya re we here? that was all SHIT.

Panther: Panther has mutliple cameras set up in his shoes.

Velk:Damn you Hakkyou! I'll get revenge some day!

(disappears in a puff of whoop-de fricken doo)

Hakkyou: hm. I'm good at making people hate me!

(Velk reappears, this time in a shower of pink sparkles)

Velk: Damn, those were supposed to be bleeding turtles! Anyways, forgot my photo album of Hana Montanah, kill you later, Hakkyou!

(Disappears in a puff of what the flip?!)

Hakkyou:...Wait...Hanna Montanah...It couldn't be...No. It msut be. My mortal enemy has been born.

Fox: Just what the fuck do you mean?

Hakkyou: He is... The harbinger of...Montanah...I can't belieive it, but it's happened...

Shadow: Er, what? 'Harbinger of Montanah'? Are you mental?

(Hakkyou shakes his head): Sit down, all of you. You too, Shadow, I don't care if Fara and you just ate twenty punds of shortcake, SIT. It all began a few years ago (insert 'Black water' From Advent children here), I had ignored the signs, in hopes that this wouldn't happen, but it seems my hopes were as shattered as Slippy's childhood....

TO BE CONTINUED...  


* * *

Good? Bad? Plot development? Anyways, Velk, contact me, you've just been casted into my story. Please? You're needed, man!  
Thanks, anyways, this will all be explained in the next chapter, along with some questions, so keep reading! And don't forget to  
leave some questions on the way out! And Velk, seriously, CONTACT ME. You're now essential to my story!

XD


	5. Of Avoided Plots, Meaning, nothing new

Okay! People have really caught on now- it actually seems  
popular. Meh, thanks though. - :D  
Alright, I have a lot of shit to write, and I won't explain more of  
the whole "Montanah' business until I've discussed it  
with the people who'll be important in it (I'll tell you all at the end  
of this chapter, just to keep you in suspense.)  


* * *

**Hakkyou suddenly stood up, looking in shock at the ceiling. All of the Star Fox characters raised their heads to see as well**

Hakkyou: Oh my god! LE CIEL EST TOMBE! LE CIEL EST TOMBE!!!

Wolf: We don't speak French...

Slippy: Je ne parle pas dans le Francais!

Hakkyou: That makes me hate you all the more, Toe-rag.

Fox: HOLY CRAP- THAT GUY FELL THROUGH THE CEILING!!

**And indeed, as Fox had said, a persons body was visible in all of the dust. Slippy wailed his grief to the heavens.**

SP: Oookaaaayyyyyy....Er, sorry about that....

Hakkyou: It's fine, I'll just make Slippy do it once he's stopped angsting

SP: Alright! No question too dirty, huh? I will like this...

SP: To Slippy: What was the most f*d up thing you did with Amanda?

Slippy: huh? Amanda? Who's that? Have I stalked her before?

Falco: Dude, you need to get a life.

Fox opens his mouth to insult Falco, but think on the situation.

Fox: I think I'll leave this at Slippy being insulted...

SP: To Falco: Have you ever shoved a firecracker up your ** and lit it?

Falco:....Yes, actually- it was Tazmanian Devil. I was dared to by my dad- the scortch marks are still there...

Bill: Hm. I must say that this answer is quite unsatisfactory, and leaves me with many a breath still in my lungs. FOOL!

SP: To Hakkyou: Are you looking at Katt's breasts? You furry!

Hakkyou:...Are you kidding me? Are you seriously retarded? Have you not paid attention to ANYTHING?! Alright, let's make this simple- I don't fancy women. Got it?

SP: Wait...then that means...

SP moves farher away from Hakkyou.

SP: To Krystal and Katt: What do you think of furries?

Krystal: Er, well, not to be rude but...

Katt: Let's just say it.

Katt&Krystal: Ahem...YIFF IN HELL FURFAGS!!!!!! Happy?

SP: Very! I feel like a pickle that's been given a new sweater!....Did I just say that?

SP: To All guys: What do you think of furries?

All Guys: RIGHT DOWN THERE!!!!...We're poiting at the ground, just so you know...

SP: To Hakkyou: Why am I talking so much about furries?

Hakkyou: Because, secretly, you have a sick and burning hot passion for furries- that or you feel like fur bashing. The latter is great fun! :D

SP:....Let's go with Fur bashing...

SP: To Wolf: Were you ever straight? If so, who were you with?

Wolf: Well, I've never actually been straight or gay, I haven't cared about love at all in my life.

Falco: meaning no, he is, and always will be, a flaming homosexual.

Wolf: Hm, oh look, a conveniently placed sub machine gun...You get a ten second head start.

Falco runs, and runs, and then get s hot. A lot. It a sub machine gun, what do you expect?

SP: To Fara: What is it like being completely neglected by the video game world where Fay and Miyu have a larger role than you?

Fara: Well, I was never in the video game series, but I can soundly say: FUCK YOU, FAY AND MIYU!! FUCK YOU, YOU EFFING LESSIES!!! FUCK!!!

Shadow: The fuck is inert!

Hakkyou: What?

Shadow: POOF!!

Shadow disappears in a large thing of smoke.

SP: To Falco: Would you beak-f**k Fara?

Falco: Depends, can she take my manly beak?

Bill: Manly beak? More like man-handled body!

All(exempting Falco): AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA(Fox: Laughing at others expense is fun!)

SP: To Hakkyou: Am I challenging censorship? CAUSE I HATE IT! DIE CENSORSHIP! (withdraws dimension-piercing remote and rips apart space)

Hakkyou:...you do that, meanwhile, let's all throw Slippy into a ..er, broom cupboard!

Slippy was hastily tossed into said broom cupboard.

SP: To Krystal: Do you think you could make gay men straight and turn chicks lesbian?

Krystal: Oh yeah! Watch.

Krystal stares expectantly at Fox. Fox scratches his ear. Krystal takes off her shirt. Fox wipes dust off of his shirt. Krystal takes all of her clothes off except for her under garments. Fox falls asleep.

Krystal: GOD DAMMIT. Huh? Shadow, what are you doing here?

Shadow stares at Krystal.

Shadow:......................................................................................................................................................................................Giggity!

Shadow runs around the room, going 'giggity giggity goo!', eventually running out the door.

Hakkyou: Don't even try and embarass yourself by trying anything on Fara...or Katt...

SP: To ALL (Hakkyou runs up to him and starts beating him with a baseball bat, beating the sense into him "Just so you all know, you DON'T steal my sayings. GOT IT?!): If you could have superpowers, what would it be?

Wolf: Ability to fly

Hakkyou: Ability to turn invisible...that or flying powers...

Fox: Super speed!

Slippy: The ability to be more of a not retard!

Hakkyou: Uh, who let you out of the cupboard?

Falco: A douche sense

Katt: Then it would always go off if you ahd it. Power.

Krystal: Ability to....Make delicous exploding pies!...?!

Bill: Er, laser eyes!

SP: To Hakkyou: Do you think Timid has a soft M rating and Shadow a hard T for their Q & As?

Hakkyou: Er, well, I haven't read Timid's...what one is it?...And yeah, Shadow is a horny bastard. :D

SP: To Hakkyou: Do you even read other Q & As?

Hakkyou: Yeah, I usually try to look for them, although not many people have picked up on them, which is good for the people who DO make them. I.E the cool guys.

SP: To Hakkyou: I deleted both my stories 3 years ago. Should I write a Q & A?

Hakkyou: Well, that all depends- Q&A fics takea lot of work, actually, becuase they can become popular, and you might get lots of reviews, which means lots of questions, and there's always the trouble of cutting out questions- people more than likely stop reading because of that. But, if you want, you could make one, but show me your ideas: always start of with it making snese, for one, the tomfoolery can follow later.

Hakkyou: Do I have nothing better to do?

All: Absolutely not!

ALL: AM I crazy?!?

All: As crazy as and old lady speed racing a dolphin. Or a gigantic panda blasting a hole through a knight with a rainbow spewed from it's mouth.

Katt: Have you ever tail-f**d yourself?

Katt: Have YOU ever tail fucked yourself??

HOO... done... bye!

Hakkyou: DAMN! That took forever...

Falco: maybe it's because you suck so much...

Hakkyou: Ignore ignore ignore. Well, we have some not questions from Adam.

Adam promptly appears from non-being.

Adam: yeah, I'll ask next time.

Hakkyou: See ya, then.

Adam: Later.

Adam goes back into non-being.

Kris storms into the room with a thunderstorm gathering outside.  
It cracks lightning as he yells at Hakkyou.

WHAT FRESH HELL?! I JUST looked up what the white robe was for...you...you bastard!

Hakkyou: Uh, dude, I believe you just broke a rule, YOU DON'T USE MY FUCKING LINES!!!! (Pulls out masamune)

Kris: I DUN GIV A SHI*!

Fox: Holy crap another fight, sweet!

Hakkyou and Kris: SHUT THE FU*K UP, CAN'T YOU SEE WE'RE ARGUING HERE!?

Fox runs and hides behind a conveniently placed Bill. ( Sorry, don't do jokes like people wetting their pants *shrugs*)

Kris: Okay...now that I got over that, ONTO QUESTIONS-

Hakkyou: Hold it! (Pheonix Write music begins to play)

Kris: Whhaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!

Hakkyou: That statement is contradictory to what was previously said! I will not sit down and allow this to slide! We fight!!

SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO......

(Final Fantasy battle music plays)

Hakkyou uses 'Draw Slash'! 1 hit! 9999 DMG!  
Kris uses 'Racial Slur'! 2 hits! 300 DMG!  
Hakkyou uses Limt Break! **Octoslash!** 8 hits! Critical DMG! 80072 DMG!!  
Kris is defeated! (Fanfair starts playing *FF winning music*)  
Gained 90000 munny!  
Gained 30 000 exp!  
Hakkyou gained a level!  
Hakkyou is level 61!

Kris:..Well damn...  
To Krystal: YOU WOULD STRIP FOR A DOLLAR!? THEN HOW ABOUT FOR PANTHER?

Krystal: Would I strip for a dollar? I'd strip for a piece of bread! But not Panther. Never Panther.

Panther: Panther is sad.

Wolf: And no one cares.

SP: To Fara: WOULD YOU ** **O FOR A ** DOLLAR?

Fara: Aw *** Yeah I'd ** for a **! I mean, ***, who wouldn't *** for a ***?! **** yeah!!

SP: To Bill: Whats going on here? (audience snickers at the clever joke) No seriously...whats going on?

Bill: I don't know either...Ask Shadow....

Hakkyou: yeah, explain this for us, Shadow.

To Hakkyou: To "Hakk" yourself would be to uhh...(searches through something guide to the galaxy) AHA! To hakk yourself means to...lick yourself in "certain" places? okay well ahem...now that we know what it means...WOULD YOU HAKK YOURSELF?

Hakkyou:...Mayhaps...But I'm not a preverted freak, so less than likely. Even less, maybe. No, actually.

To Wolf: Hey look I'm cutting up my robe from last night... (glares at Hakkyou who shrugs and smiles) and making papaer airplanes with it.

Wolf:...That's great and all....But why paper air planes? What, d'you think one poked my eye out or something? Ha! No, my eye is still there, I just use this thing to get an extra edge.

Kris:...hey, is that food?!

Hakkyou: yeah.

Kris: What is there?

Hakkyou: Slop. And stew.

Kris: What's the stew?

Hakkyou: yesterday's slop.

Kris:ughhhh......

Kris slowly backs out of the room.

Velk: Hey Hakkyou!

Hakkyou: Oh, hey Velk...How did you get in here...?

Velk: oh, that Nazi guy let me in!

Hakkyou: He's part of the KKK...

Velk: Whatever. ANyways, can i use my OC, Adimid?!

Hakkyou: Er, no, probly not. Sorry.

Velk: it's cool, have some cake!

Hakkyou:...Thanks....But I just ate...

Velk: Whatever. See ya.

Hakkyou: Later, then.

(Too late, SP. XD)

Shadow breaks through a wall....THE FOURTH WALL!!!!!!!!

Hakkyou: What's the news, Shadow?

Shadow: Hey, Hakkyou thanks to Shaky, I now have a Zanpaktou. If you don't watch Bleach, which you probably do, it's the sword that a Soul Reaper uses. Mine is as tall as me. More fighting, I have to try this thing out.

Hakkyou: Well, I don't watch Bleach anymore, but I know what you mean. PLease don't tell me it looks like Ichigo's. I need to think of getting my own weapon...

To Wolf and Fox: Acting, eh? ...I'm not so sure.

Wolf: We're debating whether or not we're gay...

Leon: uh, from the sounds of you two last night, you ARE gay.

Shadow: To Hakkyou: Not shortcake, don't you get it? Whip cream is used to lick off each other! I don't care if Slippy is traumatized, I'm going to explain. (He takes about five minutes talking about it) ...and we both explode. Done.

Hakkyou: I know prefectly well what you meant, I just felt like saying short cake. Haven't said it in a while...And it also tastes good...

Shadow: I'm gonna Soul Blast you soon...

Hakkyou raises an eyebrow.

Shadow: To Fara: I don't know if Timid would like what I did... Why did I agree?

Fara: I don't really care if Timid likes it or not, we should 'eat shortcake' more often!

Hakkyou: Gross! DID NOT NEED TO HEAR THAT!!!

Shadow: Dude, how old ar you again?

Hakkyou: Shut up, I don't quite believe in love.

To Falco: You fail at life. I might just slice you with the Zanpaktou.

Falco: I'm not worth the trouble!

Shadow: Personally, I prefer you dead!

Falco: Smooth flying, Shadow.

Shadow: Shoot! He's right behind me!

Falco: Hands off my bread!

Hakkyou: SHUT UP!!

Hakkyou pulls out masamune and attacks Falco.

Shadow: To Krystal: ...Bounty hunter...heh...

Krystal: I FELL ENRAGE FOR REASON UNKNOWN TO ME. KRYSTAL ANGRY! KRYSTAL SMASH!!!

Krystal starts feebling beating up the t.v

To Fox: Do the Hustle.

Fox:...The...hustle...?

Shdaow: yes. The hustle.

To Hakkyou: Make him do it, even if he refuses.

Hakkyou:...Sorry man, but neither of us know what 'the hustle' is...Explain, and we'll talk.

To Leon and Wolf: Leon's gay, Wolf is bi, they both slept with other guys.

Wolf: Lies! I'm purely gay!

Shadow: But you just said-

Wolf: LIES! NONSENSE! TOMFOOLERY!!!!!

Leon: Believe it or not, I'm straight...

To Hakkyou: If you want to co host, you have to be put in the poll. At the earliest, I can have you host in chapter ten through twelve.

Hakkyou: Meh, I'm alright with that- of that long of a wait.

Shadow: now you're catching on!

To Everyone: Do you hate Hakkyou for what he's done? Trapping you here and forcing you to answer questions?

All: YES!! THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING!!!!

To Everyone: Keep impressing me! Do the Dew! As in Mountain Dew!

Slippy: I do it every Tuesday!

Panther spits out the Mountain Dew he was drinking.

Rukia drags Shadow away, saying that Ichigo needs a replacement.

Keep impressing me!  
Shadow

Velk: How do I contact you, Runescape?

Hakkyou: HOW DO YOU KEEP GETTING IN HERE?!?!?!

Velk: That Thief dude let me in...

Hakkyou: He's a ninja/shinigami...

Velk: Whatever.

Hakkyou: I certainly hope you're not being serious about that Runescape business...Cause if you are, I swear, heads will roll... And blood will run thick in the streets...

Velk: No, dude, it was a joke. Chill. See ya.

Hakkyou: Later...

Velk walks out of the backstage door....AGAIN!

Hakkyou: Well, that's the last of it...Remember, Bill can get questions too! And I might add a few others, too...

Fox: But you said you'd explain the Montanah-

Hakkyou: Silence, fucker.

And there was silence.  


* * *

Okay, here are the people that, I hope, will allow me to use them in the plot.  
Velk, Shadow, Timid, Shaky, Starfoxlover, Kris, SP, and maybe a few others.  
So, PM me and tell me if you'd like to or not. Thanks, and leave questions on the way out!


	6. And That's How I Broke the Fourth Wall!

Alright, it's been a while, but I'm back!  
I'm going to write the next chapter for  
Absolute Zero int he next couple of days,  
but I'm really busy with school, so I probly  
won't post fro a while after this: I got all  
of my work done in class :P

Alright! Let's Go!  


* * *

Hakkyou, Wolf Fox and Shadow are playing rockband, with Fox&Wolf on the guitars, Shadow on drums, and Hakkyou singing. Altogether, they owned.)

Hakkyou: Now that that's over, time for some questions!

Shadow walks out of the shadows, and drops casually onto a chair

Shadow: alright, listen up, bitches. I just got home, and you need me back again so soon? WTF?!

Hakkyou: Well, you see, demands are high and--

Shadow: FIGHTING POSES!!!

Hakkyou: You're on!!

Shadow pulls out a zanpaktou, while Hakkyou takes out his newest sword-

Shadow: Why is it red?

Hakkyou: Cause, red equals fire, so it can use fire magic!

Shadow: Well shit. SOUL BLAST!!

Hakkyou: AH! Can we do this later?! We have questions!!

Shadow: Hmph, you're just scared!

Hakkyou: We'll see who's scared at the end of this...Just ask the questions!

Shadow: To Hakkyou: I am not a honry bastard, I'm only one who is educated in vulgarity and someone who is ready to dish it out anywhere.

Hakkyou: Hot

Shadow: I...Feel...VIOLATED!!

Hakkyou: Yeah, I read all about it in Big Whoop Magazine.

All: OH SNAP!!

Shadow: Don't take my jokes- To Falco: you doing okay? Or has feminine odor got you down? Maybe it's that new birth control you're taking.

Falco: I know what you mean, but is Yasmin right for me?

Shadow: of course, all you have to do is take twenty four pills before and after sexual intercourse.

Falco: Wow! Sounds complicated!

Shadow: It's pretty complicated! The pills are made of stuff that protects you!

Falco: Brilliant! I'll take the whole lot!

Many people appear and begin to make bids for Shadows Yasmins.

Shadow: ya know, all you have to do is say the word, and I'll materialize some kick-ass weapons for you to go after the authors who made you do this. (A bunch of kick-ass weapons appear) Wait! What have I done?! RUN HAKKYOU!! RUUN!!!

Hakkyou: I don't run away.

Hakkyou Brandishes his sword, which is yet to be named, and Bill picks out a weapon.

Hakkyou: Try your luck!

Bill: Pay-back time!!

Bill begins firing rockets at hakkyou, who slices them in half. Somehow saving himself.

Shadow: I'm...Just gonna do the rest of my questions. To Fara or Krystal:...Giggity? Maybe? I got whip cream.

Fara and Krystal look at eachother, then dash at Shadow, who dodges them and they fall into the fridge. Fighting noises can be heard from inside.

Shadow: Heheh. To Slippy: Gay, and you like it in the ass! oh, wait sorry. I thought you were Falco.

Falco: THEY'RE MINE!!!!

Shadow: To Everyone but Fox: Fox humps the t.v at night when no one uses it and Krystal isn't around.

All: SICKENING!!!

Fox: not only is that not true, but I'm obivously gay-

All: SICKENING!!!

Fox: But-

All: SICKENING!!!

Fox:...

Shadow: To Everyone: Keep impressing me! Do the Dew! And i mean drink it, Slipp! Now if you'll exuces me, I've got to hide from Rukia. See ya!

Shadow leaves through wormhole that happened to be in Slippy's ear.

Hakkyou: That's enough.

Hakkyou runs his hand down the blade, fire running where his hand has been. He swings it around to his right side, and appears behind Bill with it in front of him. Bill drops the rocket launcher and doubles over, then gets caught in an explosion.

Announcer: 99999999 DMG!! Bill defeated! Obtained 27 munny! Gained 3 EXP! Potion get!

Hakkyou: Not even worth the trouble.

Bill:...Pain....

Fox: Yeah, Shadow left.

Hakkyou: Damn, we didn't get to fight! Coward!!!

Adam: Sup, bitch?

Hakkyou: How the freshly cut cucumber did you get in here?!

Adam: I just flew out of Slippy's ear when I tripped and fell in a hole...

Hakkyou: Yeah, be careful of that: There's a womrhole in his ear...

Adam:...Just gonna ask questions now...To Fox: You Like ***********************

Fox:....Uh, right....Seeing as though I can't read that..Sorry, Adam, I just can't answer your question...

Adam: Damn! to Fox. Likes. ********************************

Krystal: Er, Adam, you may want to find an alternative to saying that...Then we'll be able to respond correctly...

Adam: Shit! to Falco: You ARE a ******************

Falco: DON'T SaY THAT!! MY FATHER USED TO CALL ME A **************** WHY (sob) DIDN'T HE LOVE ME?! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY(sob sob sob)

No one cared. Espescially not Falco's father.

Adam: He answered it well!

Hakkyou: Silence, fucker.

Adam:...To Panther: Your ******* is weak.

Panther: PANTHER'S **** IS NOT WEAK. PANTHER ANGRY! PANTHER SMASH!!!

Panther begins to throw a fit.

Adam: To Slippy: You don't have a ***

Slippy: And you don't ahve an insult, due to stars!

Adam: GO DIE OR SOMETHING!!! TO DOG TYPES(including foxes): Did you know that the higher your tail is, the more "Alpha" you are?

Fox:....Er, yeah, actually...

Wolf: It's the code of our world- at least, one of the rules, anyways...

Krystal: My tail is blue!!

Adam: To Krystal: So, bounty hunted, where is your Gasmmeter?

Krystal: Anger...Surging! Rage.....Rage...RAGE- RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
RRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Leon: HOLY SHIT!! SHE'S GOING SUPER SAIYAN!!!!

Wolf: Fox! What does the Scouter say about ehr power level?!  
Fox:...It...IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAND!!!!!!!

**CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI**  
Krystal:** KAAAAAAMEEEEEEHAAAAAAAMEEEEHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI CHI**

All(Except Krystal): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!.......

Everything goes white, they're in a desolated area, with only Hakkyou and the StarFox characters remaining.

Hakkyou: Ugh.. Don't ever do that again, Krystal....

Krystal: I'm sorry, I don't know why, but being called bounty hunter pissess me off for some reason...

Bill:...Double Pain....

Katt: Can't you see I'm on the fucking phone?!

Katt kicks Bill.

Wolf: Hey...Where'd Adam go?

Fox: He must have gotten the full strength of it...

Leon: Which means...

Wolf: Dead. Probably... Krystal is a murderer~ Krystal is a murderer!~

Hakkyou: *sigh* Let's just get some more guests...We can worry about location next chapter...

Hakkyou looks around, but is suddenly taken from behind.

Hakkyou: ACK!! GET OFF!! OW OW OW OW OWWWW!!!!!

Kris is grabbing Hakkyou by the ear. He tries to break free, but Kris just increases the pressure on said ear, causing more pain. hakkyou submits.

Kris: BASTARD!!!

Hakkyou: WHAT?! WHAT NOW?!

Kris: THE FIGHT FROM YESTERDAY!! RACIAL SLUR?! WHAT THE FUCK?!

Hakkyou: Oh, yeah, well, you see....

Kris: NO I DUN SEE NOR DO I WANT TO YOU MUTHERFUCKING NI- I mean...

Hakkyou looks at Kris, his mouth a comical 'O' shape.

Kris: *Cough cough* What I meant to say was...YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!! Okay, Question time!

Kris: To Everyone: Why do you hate furries? WHY?! They're so cuddly and cute... WHY, YOU FURRY HATERS?! WHY?! Oh, and by the way, aren't you furries yourself?

Hakkyou: Allow me to answer this one... You don't properly understand what a "furry" is, do you? I have some sensitive viewers, and I don't want to ruin their lives, so I'll whisper it to you.

Hakkyou begins whispering in Kris' ear, whose eyes were slowly becoming wider and wider, an expression of mingled horror and sigust easy to define.

Kris: You..You mean....Furries... Dress as animals and go to orgies and do animals and they're mostly gay and they're trying to take over the world and none of these people are furries because they don't believe they have an 'inner animal' and go to disgusting orgy masquerades?

Hakkyou: Precisely. And to all you furries out there, this is not an insult to you, but my own opinion on this...business. Oh, and...

All: YIFF IN HELL FURFAGS!!!! So, drop this subject completely Kris.

Kris:...I am shaken...I'll ask some questions.. To Krystal: Did oyu know....FOX HAS HERPES?! and that your tail is blue?

krystal: I didn't know that! My tail really is blue! I just said that because I wanted attention....Fox has herpes? All the more reason to find Shadow...

Fox: I don't have herpes!!! Honestly!!!!

Wolf: Yeah, I'd know.

Kris: Disgusting. To Fara:..Who are you again?

Fara: WAAAH! NO ONE-a-PAYS ATTENTION TO-a- FARA!!!!

Kris: To Fox: Krystal doesn't really love you...She loves Leon!

Leon: Sweet!

Krystal: WHAAAAAAAAAT?!

Fox: Don't care. Why are you all under the illusion that I like Krystal-

All: SICKENING!!!

Fox: but-

ALL: S I C K E N I N G ! ! !

Fox:...

All:...

Fox:...you guys suck...

Kris: To Leon: Do you love Krystal? or maybe Wolf? Or even yourself? you selfish bastard!

Leon: Number one and three! *points at Krystal* Oooooh yeeeaaaaahhhh!...

Krystal screams and runs from the petrifying point of Leon's finger.

Kris: Take this cucumber and shove it up Falco's ass!

Hakkyou: I got it!

Falco: Nyeh?!

Hakkyou appears in front of Falco and does a jumping vertical sweep thing. It send Faloc into the air, okay?

Falco: NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...?

Hakkyou: That's enough.

Hakkyou appears above Falco, who had reached the height of his flight.

Falco: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARK

Hakkyou lands, turning around and giving a thumbs-up to Kris, who returned the gesture. Falco landed on his back, the tip of the cucumebr visible through the seat of his pants.

Hakkyou: that was fun.

Kris: Damn straight! or crooked, in your case.

Hakkyou: Whatever. NOW CAN YOU LET GO OF MY EAR!!?!?

Kris proceeds to throw Hakkyou onto the couch, where he lands on Wolf.

Wolf: Well, look who decided to drop on my lap...Wanna make hot love?

Hakkyou jumps off and brandishes his sword at Wolf.

Hakkyou: Get away from me...I hate love.. straight or gay...

Hakkyou stares coldly at Wolf.

Wolf: If it means I can be with you then I dun care. WOLF! (Wtf?)

Wolf attempts to jump on Hakkyou, swipes his hand in front of him, a fireball flying from it and blasting Wolf ack onto the couch. Wolf doesn't get up.

Hakkyou: Okay...*Brushing dirt of his shirt* I'm featuring some peple in my show and I need their permission first-

Kris:Use me IN the plot?! CERTAINLY NOT!! Im' pretty sure you'll just make me look like part of the K anyways... And that's probly it. BASTARD.

Hakkyou: Er, no, actually...*Rubs his head* I'm making fun of how people follow trends so easily, and Hannah Montanah seemed a hilarious idea, so.... *Hakkyou shrugs his shoulders* I'd probly make a reference or two to the K, but...

Hakkyou: *Rubbing temples* I think I'm gonna have a migraine...

Velk walks in.

Hakkyou:....What the fuck are you doing here?

Velk: That Nazi dude told me-

Hakkyou: KKK

Velk: Whatever. He told me the way here....But what ahppened to the place?

Hakkyou glares at Velk.

Velk: Well...Uh, see ya!

Velk runs off into the distance.

Hakkyou: Where'd Kris go?

Hakkyou looks around, and then notices a note on thr ground, picking it up, he read aloud.

Hakkyou: Dear COCKyou, we have kidnapped your bestest friend and have taken him to the lair of Montanah. If you do not arrive by 9:00 someday, we will force him to have a tea party with Peach and Zelda. Sincerely, Random Guy who develops plot. Huh. Weird. Shadow's standing right there...even though, I have closer friends...meh, who cares.*Shadow waves*

Fox:...You're not even gonna do anything?

Wolf: Coward.

Hakkyou: It's not my way. I'll let them come to me.

Bill:....Anyways, let's answer some questions!

Hakkyou looks at Bill in surprise

Hakkyou: Bill! Smashing! Simply marvelous to see you! Croking good to speak again! *Hakkyou beings shaking hands with a very confused Bill*

Velk: To Shadow: I ROOK YOU Su-ck.  
To Timid: I LURVE YOU!!..Where did that come from? *Srhugs, then proceeds to pull out three swords, one in each hand and one in his mouth*  
Shadow, you rock, but Death sadi you have to die!  
Shadow: Sorry, but that's idiotic.

Shadow summons his Zanpaktou and knocks the first sword out of Velk's mouth, and shatters the other two.

Shadow: _Never_ believe anything that One-Piece shows. That show is an epic failure.

Velk (Staring down the end of the Zanpaktou): W-What?! But, if that guy can do it...

Shadow: shakes his head and makes the sword dissappear. Velk looks hopeful

Shadow: SUPERNOVA RASENGAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shadow catches Velk full in the face with the swirling ball orange core chakra. Everyone watches him fly away.

Hakkyou: Shadow...We have something to finish...

Shadow looks over his shoudler and summons his Zanpaktou.

Shadow: Bring it on!

Hakkyou: You asked for it...

The two run at each other, the clash in the middle of the wasteland, chakra surround Shadow's sword, Hakkyou's sword a red-ish white hot color.

Fox: This is a very violent fanfic...

Wolf Looks and speaks at the camera

Wolf: And that's how I broke the fourth wall!  


* * *

Well, that took effing forever.  
Meh, I'm glad I did it. be sure  
to check out the newest chapter  
of Interview with StarFox; it had  
me laughing harder than I had even  
hoped.

Later!  
Hakkyou


	7. And the Lights Went Out

Okay, back soon, but I have another free night, and I won't for a while,  
so I'm going to update them both, alright? Alright. As I've put in Zero's summary,  
I'm gonna take some ideas from Final Fantasy. Seven, to be specific. Well,  
who cares right now, on with the show!!  


* * *

Hakkyou: That was all pretty fun..And now that I have my music playing, I'll be good to go!

Leon: Good to go get fucked, that is...

Hakkyou:...Say something?...!

Leon: Er, no. Nothing.

Hakkyou: Exactly. Okay, not as busy as usal, so this means this one'll be shorter...I think I might do some plot developing-

Fox: The wall! THE WALL!!!

Hakkyou: Oh, er, right- uh, sorry....Questions! Yes, questions! BRING IN SHADOW.

Shadow falls from the sky, and then melts into the ground, only to appear an inch above it and land on his face.

Shadow: Damn, I screwed it up!

Hakkyou:....Weird...

Shadow: You! *Pointing at Hakkyou*

Hakkyou: Eh?! What?!

Shadow: Yeah, Velk is important. But guess who I'm going to have to deal with it? I'm not going to tell you yet.

Hakkyou: Then why did you bother opening your mouth?

Shadow: Moving on! To Wolf:...

Shadow:...

Wolf:...

Shadow:...

Wolf:...

Shadow:...

Wolf:...

Shadow: SMACK!!!

Wolf: GODDAMMIT!!!

Krystal: Nice slap!

Shadow looks at Krystal

Shadow: The offer's still open.

Looks at Fara

Shadow: Same to you.

The two stare at him in incredulity. Shadow stirkes a thinking pose.

Shadow: But who...? I think I know how. Whoever can eat the most whip cream. Heheh... Prodigious.

Fara and Krystal begin cramming their gobs full of whipped cream.

Shadow: FUCK MAN!! RUN!!! IT'S THE SUPER VILLAIN KNOWN AS (Insert name here) MAN!! AND HE'S ON HIS PERIOD!!! *pointing at Falco*

Falco: WHa...Uh...Eh? What...He...He...He...! HE'S A TRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Falco runs off into the distance. No one misses him.

Shadow: To Bill: Hope you don't mind, but you're very immature in the first few chapters of Malice and Desperation. But there's a plan for it. Sorry!

Bill: Nah, s'okay. Hey, what's under there?

Shadow" Huh? Under where?

Bill: HAHA I MADE YOU SAY 'UNDERWEAR!!'

Bill begins dancing around, but trips and lands on his head, effectively knocking himself out.

Hakkyou: Too bad. I wanted to make him feel pain.

Shadow: To Hakkyou: (Shadow slams his Zanpaktou into the ground, and it begins glowing as he does aprox. 50 hand signs in ten seconds).  
Ninja Art: Ultima Shadow Eruption! ( Shadow grabs the Zanpaktou and swings it vertically at Hakkyou, sending a large wave of black and gold energy at him)

Hakkyou: Nice trick. But the triangle button is my friend!! (Hakkyou presses the /\ button, and jumps out of the attack's way, sending back his own attack of white and red, which Shadow dodges as well)

Shadow: Damn the /\ button!!! Heheh. I love Q&A's. Don't forget, the War is back on. The contestants are you, me, timid, shaky and SFL. Bring it on!

Hakkyou: Another one? Ridiculous...Anyways, you know who you remind me of?

Shadow: Who?

Hakkyou: Sora, but with a Zanpaktou and Ninja skills...

Shadow:..Strange... HOLY CRAP!!! HAKKYOU!! YOUR UN-NAMED SWORD!!!!

Hakkyou looks down in horror as he watches the blade of his un-named sword crumble into nothing.

Hakkyou: Damn you...Damn you....HOJOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Hakkyou falls to his knees and yells to the heavens, lamenting his loss*

Shadow: dude, chill. Just gett a new one.

Hakkyou: Good plan! Be right back- Shadow, you have to be host for a while. See ya!

Hakkyou turns around and walks away. He somehow gets to the horizon surprisingly fast.

Shadow: Alright! Now, who's the next-

????: Shadow!!!!!!!

Shadow: Timid!!!!!!

The two run to each other and embrace. Far away, Hakkyou stumbles.

Hakkyou: Did I just feel...love..on my show?...SHADOWWWW!!!!!!!!

Back with the show

Timid: Okay, I'm here to ask questions.

Shadow: Shoot.

Timid: To Falco: Are you going out with Katt Monroe?

Falco: Kinda.

Katt: A bit.

Timid:...That is NOT a valid answer.

Falco: I dunno...We hang out.

Katt: We're pretty much just friends... It'd be way too awkward...

Timid: I've learned something. A bit. To Males; Do you look at ****?

Males: Well, we're going to assume that says porn, so, yes!

Timid: Do you like yuri? Does it turn you on?

Fox: No.

Wolf: Nah.

Leon: HELL YEAH!!

Panther: Panther doesn't understand why gay girls are thought to be hot.

Shadow: Hmm...I dunno...haven't ventured there...

Timid: Same as last one, but yaoi instead of yuri.

All but Fox&Wolf: NO!!!

Fox: Definately!!

Wolf: I'd take the whole lot...

Timid: To Girls: Do you look at ****?

Girls: Well, that's probably porn, so not that much, but yeah, we're used to it.

Timid: Do you like yuri? Does it turn you on?

Krystal: Ew! No, no thanks.

Fara: I'd thought of it...

Katt: Meh, dunno, don't really care much.

Timid: Same question as before, but yaoi instead of yuri.

Krystal: I don't really see the merit in it for us...But kinda...

Fara: It's usually good...

Katt: Still don't care much.

Timid: To All but Slippy: I'm sorry if I offended you with those last six questions!

All(But Slippy): Nah, not a problem.

Timid: To Slippy: In this fic, you suck. In my fic, I'll make you vaguely normal.

Slippy: I once slept in Krystal's boots!!

Krystal begins running around, trying to get her boots off.

Timid: I LOATH SHAKESPEARE'S ENTOURAGE!! WHO'S WITH ME?!

Hakkyou: Explain a bit more, and I might concede.

Timid: When did you get here?

Hakkyou: When youw ere asking the porn questions.

Timid:...Why didn't you answer?

Hakkyou: Didn't fel like it.

Timid: But!...But!!

Hakkyou: What do you think the answer is, anyways?! I've made it clear haven't I?! THEN TAKE A FUCKING GUESS!!!

Timid:...Sooo.....Yuri?

Hakkyou glares at her.

Hakkyou: Perish. Now.

Hakkyou jumps at her, pulling out a new sword-

Shadow: You're not hurting her!

Shadow blocks Hakkyou and knocks him back with his Zanpaktou.

Shadow: Got the new sword?

Hakkyou: What? Too retarded to see it?

Hakkyou holds out his new sword in front of him: The sword is pure white and of normal length. Hakkyou spins it and ends ina battle position.

Hakkyou: Let's test this thing out...

All Star Fox Crew: NOT.

The screen slides to the right, revealing Hakkyou, Timid and Shadow in a serious discussion.

Timid: Then they must have Kris! I haven't heard from him ina while...

Hakkyou: Meh...Couldn't we just leave him? He hurt my ear!

Shadow: No way! We have to help him! Seriously, he'd help us!

Hakkyou: Wouldn't ehlp me. Besides, there's nothing to worry about! What, are they gonna realise they got the wrong guy and shut off the power to our hide out and try to take one of us to they're hide out so that we'll have to go and save them because one of them is very dear to the other and one'll feel bad because it was his fault that this all happened, so he goes along and fights off the Montanah followers, eventually cutting of the head off the beast itself?

And the lights went out.

Hakkyou-Timid-Shadow: Shit.  


* * *

Alright, short, but I'm tired. Not gonna write anymroe tonight, so forget about Zero.  
Any good? Hopefully. I just wanna get this Montanah thing over with! Whatever.  
And don't worry Velk, you're very important ot the plot. Okay, this time, instead of  
sending me questions, join me in my battle against Montanah! Bring any of your OC's  
if you have them lying around, and get your best weapons out. And remember-  
Embrace your dreams, and no matter what- Protect your Fanfiction honor.  
Oh noez! The new sword broke! DAMN YOU HOJOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!  
(The joke is that Hojo is involved in everything, becuase he IS involved in everything in Final Fantasy VII)

Later


	8. Castle Montanah

Okay, time to finish this, once and for all!

on-WAAAAARDS!!!

Everything was dark in the place where they were. Fuck if I know where they are- you imagine a place! All right, so this is what happened...

Hakkyou-Timid-Shadow:Shit.

Fox: IT'S SO DARK!!

Krystal: I'M INVISIBLE!!! SWEET!!

Falco: Huh. PANTS!!!!

Slippy: Krystal, you smell like blueberries....

Krystal:No...no!....NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Wolf: Paper planes...Everywhere! WHY AM I SO AFRAID OF PAPER PLANES?! IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SEEENSE!!!!

Timid: Mmmmf!....

Shadow:...

Hakkyou...

The lights turn back on.

Shadow: No way. You just had to say that, didn't you?

Hakkyou: Yeah...Sorry about that mate...

Shadow: Look, let's just go save her...(Shaking his head)

Hakkyou: Cool! But first...Where in the hell are we?

Fox: Ooooh...Pretty light bulb...

Shadow: HEY DIRECTOR GUY! STOP MAKING THEM MORONS!!!

Director: Why don't you make me?

Shadow: BE RIGHT UP!!

This scene is closed to the public due to too many retarded insults, some of which including arm-hair and bogies. Yeah, not that funny.

Hakkyou: C'mon, Shadow. Let's gather some people and take that cult down. You guys stay here and answer questions, all right?

Star Fox Characters: Kaay.

Shadow: AND I TAKE THE LEAD!!!

Shadow frog-marches away.

Hakkyou:.....Wait up!!

....With Timid....

Timid: OMG! WHO GOT KIDNAPPED?!

???:...Uh...You, actually....

Timid: Well shit.

???: Timid? That you?

Timid:Hm? AAHHH!!! THE KKK!!!!

Kris: I'M NOT PART OF THE K GOD DAMMIT!!! IT'S ME!! KRIS!! AND I'M NOT EVEN IN WHITE!!!!

Timid: Oh. Wait....I was kidnapped? Well.....Shit.

Kris: That's what I said!

The two begin to talk jovially, laughing and having a good. time.

....With the Star Fox Crew....

Fox:....Er, who's gonna be the host?

Panther: Panther says that Panther thinks it is a good idea for all to share.

Krystal: Good idea! We'll go by letters.

Wolf:...Er, run that by me again?

Krystal: We take turns judging on the first letter of our names.

Bill: Sounds cool. Guess I'm first then?

All: Yeah.

Bill: Alright! Enter SkatePunk!

Punk slides in on a skateboard that had punk drawings on it, slowing to a stop near the crowd of furry freaks.

Punk: Kay, This is to Hakkyou, So tell him when he gets back.: I've submitted my Q&A. It's in the SSB section and is rated M. Have you read it?

Fox: I thought I saw him reading it...But he might have forgotten about it.....

Punk:Ah, well shit. Next question, I guess. To Fox: Who do you want to fuck?

Fox: it's not the fucking I want to do...

Wolf and Fox share a look. Yes. THAT look.

Punk: Answered in record time! To EVERYONE: How many sex postions do you know?

Fox: sixty nine! HAhahahaaa...

Wolf: Same...It's still funny thought...

Falco: Er, there's positions? Show me.

Slippy:...Can sex count as watching Krystal sleep?

Krystal: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....

Katt: twenty something.

Fara: Many- more than any mortal eye can count for.

Bill: Giggity.

Peppy: BACK IN MY DAY, THERE WAS ONLY ONE POSITION: SEX!!!

PunK: Interesting...To Falco: Who do you hate most?

Falco: That bastard Wolf for making Fox gay! He was so cool before he met him...

Wolf: The hell?

Fox: Er, Falco, you've known that I've been gay since my academy days...

Falco: I didn't notice.

Fox: I asked you to drive me to gay bars.

Falco: I thought you only went there to walk home!

Fox: (Facepalm.)

Punk: Loser. Okay, To Wolf: How have you known about the fourth wall?

Wolf: It's a burden that I've been bearing since I was a child- at the moment of my birth, it presented itself to me. I am the true Seer of The Wall.

Punk: Deep stuff... To Leon: (Whispering) I'll give you fifty credits if you can touch Krystal in all of her naughty spots simultaneously.

Leon: (Whispering back) Deal!

Punk watches as Leon disappears for half a moment, and reappears just as Krystal falls over and begins to foam at the mouth, her eyes rolling.)

Falco gasps.

Katt:OH MY GOD! THE PROPHECY HAS BEEN FULFILLED!!

Leon: Huh?

Leon disappears in an explosion of Leon colored light, leaving nothing but a foaming Krystal.)

Punk: Good stuff- And I get to keep my credits! Moving on, To Fara: Who do you like the most?

Fara: Charlie the male prostitute. He lives on Jane and Finch.

PunK: Gehto-licious...I feel violated now...To The Girls: What do you think of tentacle hentai?

Krystal: Well, I've actually seen a lot of that, but instead it's Fox ('WHAT?!')

Katt: meh, I don't really look at porn. I LIVE IT.

Fara: I've done it a few times, it's fun.

Falco:...Don't you mean, seen...?

Fara: No, I meant what I said.

Falco begins to cry.

Punk: Weird. Well, thanks for ahving me- but I wanna watch Hakkyou and Shadow fight. Where are they?

Fox they went that-a-way!

Punk: All right! See ya!

Skate Punk runs into the direction Fox pointed, soon going to catch up with Hakkyou and Shadow.

....With Timid and Kris....

Timid:Sooo.....Do you like yuri?

Kris: Yeah. You?

Timid: No! Gross.

???: All right, you two. Shadow and Hakkyou are confirmed to be on the move. You know what that means?

Both: No.

???: it means I reveal who I am to you!

??? rips his mask off viciously, waiting for their gasps of recognition.

???:...Well?

Timid: I can't see you: it's too dark.

Kris: Yeah, turn on the lights!

???: Fine!

And with the turning on of the lights, the two gasp in unision.

....With Hakkyou and Shadow....

Shadow: Soo....Get a new weapon?

Hakkyou: yeah, the other flew away; I think it's afraid of the dark.

Shadow: lame, lame...So what's the new one?

Hakkyou: I've decided to get something practical: A gun!

Shadow:.....Not impressed...

Hakkyou:....Shut up, it's cool! What with materia, I can use it to shoot lots of stuff!

Shadow: Final Fantasy Fanboy.

Hakkyou: I'm not embarrassed by that.

Punk: Wait up!!

Hakkyou: Skate Punk? What're you doing here?

Punk: thought if I tagged along I could see you two fight.

Shadow: Cool! See Hakkyou? Everyone thinks we're awesome!

Hakkyou: Idiot, we're not famous or whatever.

Shadow: Whatever. Let's go! I can see a tall building in the distance!

....With the Star Fox Crew....

Fox : My turn!

All:...How does that work...?

Forever Fades Away fades into view, and looks round at them, and yells:

To Bill: WHAT HAPPENED TO TEH BROWN FUR?!?!  
To Katt: Well, You lost your pink fur... i'm upset  
To Krystal: What would you do if nintendo made you loose all your blue fur for... orange?  
To Falco: What if your feathers were Green?  
To all: WHAT IF THEY TOOK ALL YOUR COLORS AWAY LIKE THEY DID TO BILL AND KATT?!?!

~an outraged PSC~

All:.....Ramble. Ramble ramble. RAMBLE RAMBLE RAMBLERAMLBE!!!!

Katt: My Fur is pink!

Bill: My fur's brown!

Krystal: I'd become a prostitue!

Falco: I'd have green feathers!

ALL: RAMBLERAMBLERAMBLERAMBLE!!

FFA fades away, leaving the Crew exhausted.

....With Hakkyou and Shadow...And Skate Punk....

Shadow: Well, we're here....and we only have Punk to help us...

???: Not really.

The three watch as Starfoxluver walks towards them, grinning in a victorious way.

SFL: You didn't think I'd miss out on something like this, did you?

Hakkyou: Kinda, actually.

SFL: Either way, you're lucky to have me!

Punk: Er.. What can you do?

SFL: Fight, I suppose.

???: You're not the only one!

Shadow&Hakkyou: WE'RE SO SHOCKED RIGHT NOW!!!

Shakespeares Entourage also appears.

Shaky: Hakkyou. Fuckhead. Starfoxluver. (he nods to each in turn)

Hakkyou: Hey, what's up?

Starfoxluver: Oh, it's you.

Shadow: I am not a fuck head. He is.

Shadow points at a shadowed figure.

Hakkyou: Didn't notice him...

....With the Crew....

Wolf: No guests...Let's watch t.v!

Bill: All right!

(The screen flickers on. It shows a shadowy figure that no one can make out. He talks in a very dark voice.)

Hello again, Hakkyou. Remember me? I'm the one you attempted to brutally murder. But now I'm back to take my revenge on you and the other Q&A contestants.

Now I'd like to play a game. I have currently sided with Montanah, and have something special for you. On my signal, their gunmen will fire rocket launchers on your location. These special rockets have an explosive range that no one can escape from. Knowing you, and Shadow, you might have a tactic to teleport out. You see, I have put a special forcefield around the area to prevent such escape or anything else of the matter. Nothing out, but anything can go in. The only way to save yourself and the others is if you forward 5 million credits to my account. And don't try anything. My friendly countdown can cut itself short.

You have five minutes to decide. Your move.

(The screen flickers off)

Krystal:....We don't have a way of contacting Hakkyou, do we?

All: No.

....With The Heroes....

Hakkyou: Who're you?!

Velk: It is I, Velk!

Shadow: Huh? What're you doing here?

Velk: Uh, I'm at the bad guy's tower? What do you think?

Hakkyou: so that's how it is...

The four of them get into battle positions.

Velk: You're all gonna die!

Velk pulls out four swords, one without a guard, a six foot Zanpaktou (Shadow made a scandalised sound), a five foot long broadsword, and a four foot long dagger.

Hakkyou:...Mate. Mate. Matey mate with etxra mate and a side dish of MATE. With extra mate on top. That's ridiculous.

Velk: That's why I put the all together!

They all watch as he snaps them all together, creating a monster of a sword.

Hakkyou: So what? We can still win!

Hakkyou pulls out his gun and points it at Velk-

Hakkyou: Shit!

Shadow: The hell?!

A shot rings out as Hakkyou's gun is destroyed. From the side a fox is walking towards them.

Hakkyou: Bastard.

()Fox: Who's the one with a gun?

Starfoxluver: You're still outnumbered.

Shadow:Eh?....Uh, where'd Punk go?!

...With Punk...

Punk: Ah, man, good to be home! Hope they'll be all ri- the popcorn's ready!

...With the Heroes...

Shadow:....Oh well, we can still beat you! Right Hakkyou? Hakkyou? WHAT THE FUCK?!

Starfoxluver: Not him too!!

Velk laughs at them while the Fox just grins maniacally.

Shadow: No problem! That just means more action for us!

Starfoxluver: Good way to look at it.

Shadow pulls out his Zanpaktou while Starfoxluver readied himself for a fist fight.

....With Hakkyou....

Hakkyou:...Ugh...Where am I?... Why's it so dark?...

Hakkyou gets up and stands on what seems to be pure darkness.

Hakkyou: Weird....Ack!

Hakkyou covers his eyes, a blinding light surrounding him.

Hakkyou:... What fresh hell...?

Hakkyou finalls uncovers his eyes to find he is on the top of a tower amidst a sea of darkness.

Hakkyou: Bollucks...How do I get out of here?

Hakkyou looks around, only to spot what looked like a large key.

Hakkyou: No way.

Hakkyou walks to it and picks it up. It was indeed an over-large key, but not just any key.

Hakkyou: Key Blade...Honestly...Is this the best you could think of director dude?

Shut up! Hakkyou recognises the Key Blade to be Oathkeeper.

Hakkyou: Now to find a way out of here...

Hakkyou looks around and spots a door. With a grin, he heads towards it.

....With Kris and Timid....

Kris: This is really boring...

Timid: I know. But Shadow's gonna come for us soon, I know it!

Kris: Hold on.... WHY DID YOU GUYS KIDNAP ME?!?!?

Evil Guys: Because you are his friend.

Kris: NO I'M NOT!!! HOW'D YOU MESS UP AND KIDNAP THE WRONG PERSON ANYWAYS?!

Evil Guy: Shut up! I was having a bad day, okay?!

Evil Guy: It's all right, Craig, let's just ignore them.

Timid: Lame.

....With Shadow and Strafoxluver....

Shadow: Damn! What the hell is up that sword anyways?!

Velk: I dunno- dark magic?

Shadow: Huh. HE'S A WITCH! BURN HIM!!!

The two continue to slash at each other, steel never hitting flesh.

Starfoxluver and the fox were circling eachother saying "Your move guy", not hitting eachother.

Shadow:GOD FUCKING MOTHER LICKING COW POKING COSTUME BURNING NAZI STABBING RETARD KILLING DAMMIT!! TIME FOR A JUTSU!!!

Shadow jumps off of Velk, flying high into the air. He used Chakra, okay?

Shadow: NINJA ART!: 10K KUNAI FIRETORM!!

Shadow points dircetly at Velk, who stares blandly at him. Smal explosion start going off around Shadow, sending kunais made of fire towards Velk, more and more beginning to appear. The kunai explode on contact with the ground, leaving a very large empty spot where Velk used to be.

Shadow: Aww yeah! (Shadow spins the sword and lets it rest on his shoulder.) Take him out, Starfoxluver!

SFL: It's your move guy.

()Fox: It's your move guy.

SFL: It's my move guy.

()Fox: What?

Starfoxluver punches him in the face, effectively knocking him out.

SFL: So...Think we should wait for Hakkyou?

Shadow: no way! We don't have any time. Who knows what they've done to Timid!

SFL: All right...But where could he be?

Shadow: Dunno, but he'll probly appear when something important is happening.

SFL: Good enough for me. Let's go.

The two walk to the unnecessarily large doors and push them open, finally entering the castle.

....With Hakkyou....

Hakkyou: Hope this is the last door...

Hakkyou taps the door with the tip of Oathkeeper, making it swing out wards, letting out a blindingly white light.

Hakkyou: This has got to be it.

Hakkyou walks through the door, which begins to close behind him just as missiles appear on the side of the door he had just left, exploding uselessly on the door.

Hakkyou: Shit...Where am I? A basement?

Hakkyou was sitting in the middle of a basement floor.

Hakkyou: There's the door....

Hakkyou climbed the stairs and opened the door, revealing the interior of a castle.

Okay, I'm gonna leave it here for now- I'm way too tired to keep going.  
So I'm still taking questions during this, and still trying to gather people.  
Er, yeah, Key-Blade...So what, I like Kingdom Hearts? Big whoop want to fight about it?  
I'll update Aboslute Zero in a couple of days.  
Later


	9. Keyblade Get!

So, I'm going to keep working on  
getting the Montanah thing done,  
and then I'm going to focus on  
Absolute Zero. Thanks for all for your  
reviews and all of your support in my  
Q&A!

ONWARDS!!

Shadow and SFL were walking up their seventh flight of stairs, when they abruptly came a landing. They were at the end of a hallway.

SFL: Man...this place goes on forever...

Shadow: What d'you think happened to Hakkyou?

They had reached an elevator.

SFL:Well, knowing him, he's probly on an adventure of his own...

Shadow shrugged and pressed the up button.

....With the Starfox Crew....

Fox: ...I'm really bored...when are they gonna get back?!

Bill: Look!

Bill points at the t.v

(The screen flickers on again. Mr. Saw is shown, but cannot be seen clearly.)

It seems that you didn't get my last transmission. You see, I have increased the stakes. Now, I have a tractor beam on top of the building. Don't bother trying to remove it; I have also retracted the forcefield so that it will not allow to reach it. Same as before, the forcefield will allow anything in, but nothing out. So, this time, on my command, the tractor beam will bring down a nearby meteor.

Falco: Hands off my bread! And leave us alone you retarded coward!

Look, if you wanna blame someone, blame Hakkyou and Shadow. They almost killed me when they ditched the first Q&A. Remember, 5 million credits in my account. All hail Montana!

Wolf: But Shadow and Hakkyou aren't even here...

(The screen flickers off.)

All: Shit.

....With Hakkyou....

Hakkyou: Well....Might as well look around..

Hakkyou walked into the middle of what appeared to be an extravagantly large antechamber.

Hakkyou: Hmm... (Hakkyou strikes a thinking pose)

Hakkyou looks around the room, seeing nothing but the door he had left.

Hakkyou: Aagh! What's the point of this?!

???: To piss you off and confuse you, moslty.

Hakkoyu: Huh?! Show yourself!

???: All right then...

Two lights at symetrical points appear at the wall oppostie of the door Hakkyou left began to form the outline of a door.

Soon a white door was made, and it opened outwards, revealing-

Hakkyou: Velk?! But... But!!

Velk: No buts- only battle.

Velk pulled out his swords and assebled them as he said this.

Hakkyou: I don't have time for this!

Oathkeeper appeared in his right hand in a small burst of light.

The two stared eachother down, then ran forwards, preparing their weapons for the first strike.

....With Shadow and SFL....

The elevator finally came to a halt, and the doors opened, revealing an open area that was bathed in twilight. A gate was at the other side.

SFL:...Doesn't this seem like a boss area from video games?

Shadow: Naah! You worry too much!

Shadow walks forward confidently, SFL following him a bit more cautiously.

The two reach the gate without incidence.

Shadow: See? Nothing to worry about!

???: Oh, hello!

The two quickly whirl around to see two women in dresses- one with a pink, frilly dress and a parasol- looking at them from the middle of the clearing.

Shadow: Wha?...Princess Peach?

SFL: And Zelda? This is retarded....

Peach:I think the two of you should learn some manners- that's no way to talk to a lady.

Zelda remained silent.

Peach waved her parasol, which shed its top, turning into a long sword.

Zelda made a bow appear from no where. It's called magic, okay?

Shadow: wow, this is gonna be easy!

SFL: Just need a long range weapon...

Shadow: here, have some jutsu scrolls.

SFL: Thanks...

Peach giggled and said: First, we'll killed you, then we'll drain your blood and drink it!

Zelda remained silent.

Shadow: Bring it!...wait, what?!

Peach jumped forward with startling speed and clashed swords with Shadow, Zelda training her bow on a running Starfoxluver.

....With????....

????: So, they are gathering...

#1: yes, milady!

????: And the other two? The other heroes who could lead to our down fall?

#2: Currently in their cells, milady.

????: Then everything goes as planned... But where is the short one? With the black spiky hair?

#1: Ah...we have no idea...

????: I want him found- Immediately. None of them can go unchecked.

#1: yes, milady...

....With Hakkyou....

Hakkyou blocked another crashing blow from Velk's monster sword, losing more stamina.

Velk: Had enough? Cuz you can always just give in.

Hakkyou: Like I'd let my self lose to a scallop like you!

Velk's face twisted in fury.

Velk: NEVER CALL ME A SCALLOP!! MY FATHER CALLED ME A SCALLOP- AND THAT'S WHAT I TURNED HIM INTO!!! RRAAAAAA!!!

Velk gave a mighty surge of energy, and swung Hakkyou into the far wall, bouncing off of it and falling onto one knee.

Velk: You're FINISHED!!

Velk jumped at Hakkyou- his blade high above his head-

_Can I win?_

Velk was half way to Hakkyou...

_No, you can't..._

Velk was bringing down the sword, time seemed to have slowed...

_Just give up..._

The sword was close...

_It's over anyways.._

Hakkyou closed his eyes.

The sword inched closer

Hakkyou: _No_.

Hakkyou opened his eyes and swung both arms upwards- a weight now in the left one.

Hakkyou: I'm not going to lose to a scallop- I refuse!

Velk gave another roar of anger and ran at Hakkyou just as Hakkyou got up and ran at him, holding two keyblades- one shining white, the other an unnatural blot of darkness.

Hakkyou and Velk clashed again, the battle almost lost, and almost won.

....With the Starfox Crew....

Fox:...So....anyone wanna play Truth, Dare, or Strip?

All: Yes!!

Okay, not very long, I know, but I like building tension, and I don't want to be tired tomorrow- I have a test.  
Going to finish it soon, but not too soon.  
Later


	10. Teh Moar U Know

Okay, I'm home sick so I felt like getting this  
closer to being done. I can't work on Absolute Zero  
with this thing looming over me. _ Bullocks. There's  
exams next week too. Onwards!!  


* * *

....With the Crew....

Katt: Alright Bill, since you didn't eat that bit of pickle we found in Slippy's ear, you have to lose some clothes.

Bill: That's cheating! Would you eat it?

Katt: no, but I didn't get the dare, so it doesn't really matter.

Bill: I hate you all, I really do...

Bill takes off his shirt, only to watch Leon fall out from it.

All: WTF?!?!?

Leon:...Why....why..didn't you LOOK for me?!

Bill:....What were you doing in there?-

Leon: I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW I GOT THERE!!!.....I need some sleep...

Leon trudges away to a couch, and falls on it.

Wolf: Well, looks like I go again..... Falco, truth or dare?

Falco: Dare.

Wolf: All right....I dare you to turn on the t.v, ask Mr. Saw to sodomize you while you're dancing in a bucket of eel eyes on a full moon, and then make a paper air plane and throw it into that worm hole so it'll hit me in another dimension and send the other me into a fit, all the while singing "I feel pretty".

Falco:....God dammit...

Falco walks away to complete the above dare.

Fox:...I think taking off a piece of clothing is a better choice than doing that.

Krystal: yeah, but he can't back down from a challenge for some reason.

Katt: look! The kitchen t.v!

(The kitchen t.v was flickering, and the image suddenly came into focus: was sitting as obscurely as always.)  
Mr. Saw: I THOUGHT we were playing a game, but I don't see any money. You DO know what this means Hakkyou? I will give you an additional two minutes to fill out my order, or else I will press the button to activate the tractor beam-

Fox: DON'T YOU FUCKING GET IT?! THEY'RE NOT HERE!! IT'S JUST US!! WEE DIDN'T KILL YOU- YOU ALMOST KILLED US!! AND I'M PRETTY SURE YOU KILLED PEPPY!!! SERIOUSLY, DO YOU EVEN CHECK WHO'S THERE WHEN YOU MAKE A TRANSMISSION?!?! FOR AN EVIL GENIUS PSYCHO SOCIOPATH, YOU'RE FUCKING RETARDED!!

All:.....

:...Soo.... They're not there?

Fox: No. They went to some stupid castle. Palace Mississippi or something...

: Castle Montanah?!

Fox: Yeah, that's it.

Mr. Saw's face contorted with fear equaled only by rage.

Mr. Saw: Well, excuse me, I must think of a way to kill them...What's that? Who found that camera? Falco? AW- AW-AWWW!! NO! THAT'S JUST SICK- NO STOP SINGING THAT- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!.....

(The screen flickers off)

All:....HahahhaahhahahHAHAHAHAHAhAHAHAHAAHHA!!

Wolf: WHAT A DOUCHCEBAG!! HE ACTUALLY DIDI IT!!

Katt: Holy shit- and to think I was interested in him!

Fox: Aahh, I chuckled.

Krystal: Oh my god...oh my god...I can't breathe...Bahahhaa...

Slippy:I don't really get what's so funny...

All:... Once again Slippy, you've ruined the moment.

....With Hakkyou....

Hakkyou: I'M GONNA WIN!!

Velk: I'm GONNA WIN!!

Hakkyou: NO, I WILL!!

Velk: You'll LOSE!!

Velk swings at Hakkyou.

Hakkyou: H&R BLOCKED!!

Velk: Gasp!

Hakkyou: DIE!!

Hakkyou rushes forward and stabs Velk in the chest.

Velk: GURGLE!!!...

Hakkyou:....Wow...He bleeds a lot..

Velk continues to bleed.

Hakkyou: Oh my god...I'll drown in the stuff if I don't get out! Uh, um, er, um, erm, errrrrmmm.......Door!!

Hakkyou rushes at the door and hits into it, stumbling back a bit.

Hakkyou: Damn! WHERE'S THE KEY!!!?....Oh, right, Keyblade.

Hakkyou taps the door with his keybalde- and wow! It opens! Surprise surprise!

Hakkyou: Finally, that took for ever...

Hakkyou walks through the door, which closes after he passes through, stopping the flow of Velks blood.

Hakkyou:....This is gonna take a while...

Hakkyou begins walking towards the end of the hallway.

....With Shadow and Co.....

Shadow and Peach have clashed and are trying to unbalance each other, while Starfoxluver and Zelda are circling, brandishing their fists and saying "It's your move guy".

Shadow: I'm not getting beaten by some lady in a pink frilly dress!!

Shadow grabs a sword from his back, holding it in a reverse. Peach pushes forward, and Shadow swings the second sword, knocking her dangerous umbrella aside. Shadow brings the first sword forwards and runs Peach through with it.

Peach: well, isn't this peachy...

Peach begins to dissolve into little purple things. Like in Brawl, but not.

SFL: It's your move guy.

Zelda: It's your move guy.

SFL: It's your move guy.

Zelda: It's your move guy.

SFL: It's your move guy.

Zelda: It's my move guy.

SFL: No it's my move guy.

Zelda: What?

Starfoxluver pucnhes at Zelda, but she ducks and attempts to uppercut him, missing only because he jumped away in time. The two stare each other down, then jump into the air to attack eachother.

(I don't remember if I've used this in this stoy, but I don't really care.)

Zelda: WATARI SHINNUN SHINNUN- SHINUNZUU!!!!

SFL: FARUKON PAAWNCH!!!

Starfoxluver punches Zelda on the forehead, fire surroudning his fist.

Shadow: Captain Farukon!!!!

Zelda: UUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHhhhh!!!!.......

Zelda disappears in an eplosion of fire, never to be seen again.

SFL: Show me your moves!

.....With the Evil People....

Craig: So....Lemme get this straight: They built this place so that you can only go up, and they putthe prisoner cells in part of the way to the top?

Steve: yeah that's about it.

Craig: Shit.

Timid: Shit yeah!

Steve: The fuc-

Timid runs at Steve and grabs him by the shoulders, and head butts him. Steve falls.

Kris: yeah, what kinda name is Craig anyways? Go die or something.

Craig: Fine! I'll just press the K button.

Craig falls over.

Kris: Wait a minute..How did you get free?!

Timid: oh, I wasn't tied up this whole time.

Kris:...AND YOU ONLY WAITED TILL NOW TO GET OUT?!

Timid:...Yeah, that's about it.

Kris: Surrounded by idiots...Well, if the only way out is down, then that means Shadow will be going up.

Timid: And he hasn't passed us so...

Both: We go down...?

The two take the stairs down.

....With Hakkyou....

After opening many random doors, climbing many flights of stairs, and waiting impatiently for lots of elevators, Hakkyou finally found a non-path obstucting place.

Hakkyou: Hey, an antechamber! Sweet!

???: You know, they could have just said that to make us go and get hurt or something..

???: Come one- the guys name was Craig! CRAIG, I tell you!

???:.... Alright, I get what you mean- but still!

Hakkyou watches the door open slowly, revealing-

Hakkyou: Timid?! And- Oh, it's just you.

Timid: hey- where's Shadow, then?

Kris: I feel so wanted...

Hakkyou: No clue Timid and you're not unwanted- just racist.

Kris: You- standing there-

Hakkyou: Well, you see-

Kris: NO I DUN SEE AND NOR DO I CARE- NOW GET US OUT OF HERE.

Kris grabs hold of Hakkyou's ear. Hakkyou submits.

Timid: But we have to find Shadow...

Hakkyou: Actually, Shadow has to find you.

Kris: Don't try to be smart- you'll embarrass yourself.

Hakkyou: Bastard.

Kris: I'm in control here! You're at my whim!

Hakkyou: Kinky.

Kris: AW! AWW-NO! NO AWWW- NO DON'T NOOOO!!!!

Kris lets go of Hakkyou and steps away.

Bob: hey, Lloyd! Come help me fight these two!

???: It's your move guy!

Lloyd: It's your move guy!

???: FISHCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKES!!!!!

Hakkyou: That'll be them now!

Timid: SHADOW!!!

Shadow: Do mine ears decieve me?

Kris: Wut?

Hakkyou: I dunno...Ask the author.

Llyod: Bob? Bob?! BOOOOOOB!!!!!....Er, that says 'Bob', just so you know. Not boob.

Hakkyou points drammaticaly at Bob.

Hakkyou: Finish him.

SFL: It's my move guy.

Lloyd: What?

SFL: FARUKON PAAAWNCH!!!

Shadow: rambleramblerambleramble!

Timid:answeransweransweranswer!

SFL: Hey Hakkyou, where were you before?

Hakkyou: I dunno- just kinda disappeared, I guess.

Kris: Standing right here!

Shadow: Whoah! I forgot we were trying to save you too!

SFL: Sorry, it's just your problem was more explainable, and Hakkyou just vanished, so that took priority...

Timid: Hey! Look at this sign!

Shadow: "Secret shortcut to the owner of Castle Montanah: Hannah." Huh. That's helpful.

Kris:I'm gonna go anyways: I need to hurt someone after all of this nonsense.

Hakkyou: And tomfoolery.

All: Shut up, Hakkyou.

....With the Crew....

Almost every one wasn't wearing clothes now- excluding Slippy, no one wanted to chance him taking off his clothes- mostly people in their undergarments or at least pants. Or shirt. You imagine it.

Fox: This is getting boring- and it feels like we've thoroughly played this game before.

Katt: it is kinda dull now...

Falco: That's just cuz you always do people's dares.

Wolf:...How about we put our clothes back on and play video games?

All: Best...idea...EVAR!!!

Wolf: And this is the sequel to how I broke the fourth wall.

Fox: GOD DAMMIT WOLF THAT COSTS A LOT!!

Wolf: Like what?

Fox: Like readers taking the writer seriously! By breaking the fourth wall, you make the readers think that th writer wants to be a part of it!

Wolf: Huh. I always thought that breaking it was fun. And how much does it cost?

Fox: I dunno- 30 grand?

Wolf: Teh moar u know.  


* * *

Alright, I think this one was kinda poor. Oh well, I made it less serious, I guess.  
Falcon PAWNCHes are always fun. Well, I feel dead now, so later. And send  
questions, whoever reads this, because I'll still answer them.


	11. BAHAMUT! I CHOOSE YOU!

Alright, time to finish this...  
And then I can be normal  
and just take questions again.  
I do not advise starting something  
like this if you're like me: you WON'T.  
Now on with the story!  
By the way, I'm finishing this now.  


* * *

...With the HEROIC People...!

Hakkyou: Shit! Who the hell makes a shortcut so dark anyways?!

Shadow: What? Are you afraid of the dark?

Hakkyou: Why would I be-

Shadow:Oooo...ooo...OOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!

Hakkyou: T_T'

Timid: I am... Sorta...Not really..

Kris: Why the hell am I still here?!

Starfoxluver: Look! There's a light up ahead! Praise the lord, and may he smite all non-believers!...And gays, too.

Hakkyou: I swear, I'm gonna kill you, and I'm gonna carve your name in my blood...Somehow...

The heroes continued forth, and eventually went through the blinding holy light, and in front of the was a flat roof, with three single (You know what I mean..They're a group!) figures blighting its surface. Aside from themselves.

Shadow: Velk?! But... We killed you! SO MANY TIMES!!

Velk: It doesn't matter: as long as there's somepne for me to challenge, I'll never die! Mwa ha ha ha aha!

Kris: Yeah... I don't think you're _quite_ made out for evil laughter...

Random other person: Shut up!

Hakkyou: (Strikes a thinking pose) Who're you?

Adimid: I'm Adimid!

Hakkyou: Ooh yeah... I thought I remembered you from somewhere!(Whispers to Shadow) D'you know who he is?

Shadow: Nope! Not a clue!

Adimid: What?! I'm a woman!!

Timid: What?! How's that?! This world is filled with strange people...

Starfoxluver: Er, its actually a _furry_...

Hakkyou: Not that again!

Shadow: So the last person just leaves...Hanna Montana?

Hakkyou: Thanks for correcting me...NOT!!

Montana: Yes! It is I, Ansem!

Velk: (Whispering urgently) No! We're not making a Kingdom Hearts referance!

Montana: Oh....Well, like, yeah! It's, like, totally me! GIGGLE GIGGLE!!

Shadow: Ah, my ears...

Hakkyou:...That _was_ bad...

Kris: Can we just get this over with? I wanna get home...

Velk: Silence! I will kill you, and I will carve your name into my blood-

Hakkyou: yeah, sorry, already said that.

Velk:...

Hakkyou:...

Velk:...

Hakkyou:...

Velk:...

Hakkyou:...

Pedo-bear: :D

Velk:...Damn.

Adimid: I'm surrounded by idiots...

Shadow: Like you're one to talk: You sided with _Hanna Montana_, and you can't even decide on your own species!

H&M: Like, that was sooo totally rude! Minions! Totally give me your strength! Hehehheheh!

Hakkyou: Stop it with that stupid laugh!

The Three: Shut up! Now!

Adimid: Prepare for trouble!  
Velk: Make it double!  
Adimid: To protect the world from devastation  
Velk: To unite all peoples within our nation  
Adimid: To denounce the evils of truth and love  
Velk: To extend our reach to the stars above  
Adimid: Adimid!  
Velk: Velk!  
Both: Team Rocket, blast off at the speed of light! Surrender now, or prepare to fight!  
Montana: Montana, dat's right!

All of the HEROIC PEOPLE stare in loathing and shock, not even doing anything as all three begin to glow, making it impossible to see them.

Shadow: They're beginning to glow!

Starfoxluver: We can't even see them now!

Timid: I'm still in shock!

Hakkyou&Kris: THIS WAS ALREADY ESTABLISHED!!

The light dimmed-

Shadow: The light's dimming-

Shut up!

Shadow: Sheesh, sorry!

Ahem. Right. Oh, god dammit- look at that! They've already merged and stuff! See, this is what happens if you interrupt me! God dammit! DAMMIT!! Alright...Let's just do this... And then, the monster that was the three combined stood before them, ready to fight, about to tear them limb from limb, going to shoot giant lasers all over the place and make a huge eplosion that would somehow end up with everyone on giant pieces of rock that were soaring towards earth, and they'd have a really cool air battle and stuff- Wait? What? What's it doing? The hell?! NO!!

Montana..Thing: Like, damn! You little fish sticks win! I, like, totally never thought I'd lose! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--

Shadow:...

Starfoxluver: Eh? Well, this calls for a...(Runs at ...It.. Perparing his fist) FALCON PAWWNCH!!!...AAAHHHHHH!!! SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIIIT!!!!

Hakkyou: Damn! She...IT's, way too strong to even get hit by a falcon PAWWNCH!, but it's freaking out all over the palce?!

Kris:...Should we just live it here?

Timid: No, no! We need to do something! Afterall, it _did_ kidnap us!

Kris: you're right: revenge is in order!

Starfoxluver: Well, any ideas Shadow? You're prett quiet...Shadow?

Shadow: Shut up... Focusing my chakra..

Timid: Oh! That? LEmme help, lemme help!

Shadow: Thanks!

Timid puts her hand on his arm, and her hand begins glowing. They're both ninjas, so it works that way.

Kris:...more glowing lights?

Hakkyou: Oohhh, I get it. Some giant Rasengan, right?

Shadow nods.

Hakkyou: Can't help you there. I don't believe in auras. Or chakra, for that matter.

Montana: BASIC ATTACK NUMBER TWENTY- ONE!! TYRANUSAURUS-REX ATTACK!!!

H&M began running at the grouping, flailing...its arms all over the place, hopeing to hit someone, all the while lumbering around like a drunken T-rex. Of course, no one gets hit.

Hakkyou: Almost ready?

Kris: yeah, I'm getting pretty bored...

Starfoxluver: Hello-o? My hand? Anyone gonna help?

Shadow: Alright... I think I'm ready!

Shadow takes up a valiant stance in front of ...IT, and began to focus the chakra into his hand.

Shadow: Alright, Evil boss! I'm here to end you! Ninja Art: Big-Bang Rasengan!!( BEgins making hand sigsn that could possibly just be random ways of making an ubscene hand gesture discreet)

Hakkyou: My turn too! (Hakkyou's left hand begins to glow a bright blue..Sorta.) O master of the skies, appear before me and obliterate my foes (Inspired by Tales of Vesperia) Summon: Bahamur!! BAHAMUT!! I CHOOSE YOOOUUUU!!!!!!!!( Hands throws his hand to the air(metaphor) and a sort of exlposion ting happens. But not really. It'd look more like a blue flaming transmutation circle in mid-air, which collopses on itself and shoots into the sky, now a flaming blue ball of blue flames.)

At this moment, something happened. Oh yes, so many Pokemon referances, that music began to play out of no where.

Music: I wanna be, the very best..

Timid: Cool! The old school version!

Music: That no one ever was!

DUN DUN DUN!

To catch them is my real quest- to train them is my cause...

Bahamut: BAHAMUUUT!!! BAHAMUUT! BAAHAAMUUUUUT!!!!

Bahamut flew out of the sky, completely not killing anyone, but making a nice getaway for them.

Shadow: You're gonna pay for this!! (Shadow runs at the big bad IT((For he did NOT jump on to Bahamut) and shot his hand forward, letting loose a twisting explosion, witha red core and dark blue energy running around it. Soon, the screen fades to white, and then fades back in to all of the _Answers! DAMMIT I WANT ANSWERS_ crew. all of whom are sitting in studio chairs.

Hakkyou: Well, I hope you all thoroughly enjoyed that needless fillee thing.

Fox: How do you to finally finish it?

Hakkyou: I just feel so..Free, like I don't have to worry about that stupid sub story again!

Falco: That's good. We were really bored during that moving.

Shadow: Hey, shut up! If I'm in a movie, you shouldn't be able to look away. Pidgeon.

Falco: What?!

Shadow: Pidgeon!!

Timid: Ah, didn't see this coming...

Kris: Okay, I helped you make a movie; I'm outta here.

Krystal: See you later!

Kris: Probly not.

Katt: Wow. Those were actually some good special effects!

Wolf: So....Where is Bahamut? I mean, you needed to actually get a Bahamut, right?

Hakkyou: Oh, yeah. He's tied up outside.

All: O_O'

Hakkyou: In case I need to go somewhere!

Shadow: PIDGEON!!!

Falco: PENCIL PUSHER!!!

Shadow: That was uncalled for!

Leon: IMPUDENT FOOLS! YOU WILL KNEEL BEFORE THE GREAT LEON!!!

Hakkyou: No one's kneeling any time soon...

Velk: LULULLUULULLULULULULULLULULUL!!

All:...

Velk:...

All:...

Velk:...?

Timid: Velk....who let you in?

Velk: Well, that asian dude let me in when he went out the back...'-'

Hakkyou: _sigh_ As per usual...

Shadow: i guess things are back to normal, so...See ya lter!

Timid: Give us a call if you ever have to fight a retarded pop singer who doesn't have any talent!

Hakkyou: I'll make sure of it.

Starfoxluver: I've gotta go too; Have to keep writing about Cloudy "Cloud" McCloud, y'know! gay.

Hakkyou: What?!

Starfoxluver: BAIL!!! (Jumps out of a window and runs)

Hakkyou:...Well... That's new., for sure...Rrr! I'm gonna beat that freak up! DISCRIMINITORY BASTARD!!(Just a joke.)

Fox: (We weren't in this one at all...)  


* * *

Well, that worked out better than I thought it would.  
Definately a lot of pokeman referances. To any who are  
wondering: I am still continuing my Q&A fic, but I'm probably  
gonna work on Absolute Zero. I'll only update if I get lots of questions.  
Well, thanks for sticking htrough this retarded nire of terrible literature.

Later. ('-') KIRBY!!!!:D


	12. Oh Look, an Invisible Hippogriff!

Well... Finally, back to normal chapters...  
Which reminds me: I bought a bunch of books today!  
...What? I like books!  
Big whoop want to fight about it? (I do not own this line)

ONWARDS!! ( I do however use this)

* * *

Hakkyou is reading a book while all of the starfox crew are making snide jokes at him that could possibly have ties with their lack of mention in the previous show. Hakkyou is too busy with the book to notice.

_HEY! ALL OF YOU! THE SHOW IS BEGUN AND THE AUDIENCE WAITING! GO...ENTERTAAAIIIIN!!!!!_

Falco: Captain Falcon?!_  
_

Fox: Falcon?!-

Captain: PAWWNCH!!! (Captain Falcon Falcon PAWWNCHES Slippy into one of their many televisions)

Falco:

Hitomi no oku ga boyake te mie nai  
kokoro no soko no kimochi wa aru no ?

sekai no subete wo te ni shi ta toshite mo  
sore ga anata no shiawase na no ?

Why kodoku na sora wo miageru no ?  
Why waratte mise te yo

kotoba ni suru no ga heta na  
anata no seikaku wakaru kara

Falco continues to sing _Why_ by (1)Ayaka, all of the others staring in confusion.

Hakkyou: (sigh) Guess I can't ignore you now...(snaps the book shut)

Wolf: Finally....Douchebag...

Hakkyou: Har har har. Anyways... I've thought of an idea.

Wolf: Ho ho! Another one! So soon? Don't want ot tire your brain from all of this strenuous thinking, do you?

Hakkyou: I'll kill you. I'll have you rape by a rhinoceros, stabbed in the duodena, tied to seven trees, and finally, I'll kill you in the slowest way I can think of.

Wolf: No...you can't mean...

Hakkyou: yes. I do. The most evil and indestructible force of nature to have walk...Well, they don't really walk, they just glomp around the place...this earth...Or fanfiction, to be more precise: Fangirls.

An eerie silence ensued.

Hakkyou: And now that I have your full, and albeit petrified, attention: here's the plan.

Hakkyou: For this chapter, you are all going to ask each other ONE question. This means you each get eleven questions. And if I'm wrong, then who cares; I'm horrible at math anyhow. And if you don't answer a question, you must undergo a punishment. The punishment, for not answering can be anything. And when I say anything, I mean anything.

Fox: one thing.

Hakkyou:?

Fox: Can we all ask you a question?-

Hakkyou: No.

Fox: Why not?!

Falco: Yeah, it's only fair compensation for us being humiliated all the time!!

Krystal: Yeah!

Panther: Panther says yes.

Wolf: Why do you always have to say-

Panther: PANTHER SPEAKS UPON THE GREAT PANTHERS BEHALF.

Leon: Kneel, eh? Eh? (Elbowing Bill in the ribs)

The two begin laughing. And so, a beautiful friendship was born, that probably will not be born many other times, because even that was an accident. We're sorry for the inconvenience.

A general amount of (2)rabble rousing rose from the crew, while the crowds mostly went "Awww snap!" for no reason apparently.

Hakkyou: I am trying to bring a change to this fanfiction. An ideal fanfic. (Commence Low of Solipsism from _Deathnote_.)

Falco: Eh?

Hakkyou: Just kidding!

Falco: Harumph!

Hakkyou: And to answer you (3)elicit ensuing enquirers, you can actually ask me one question, but all of you must decide on the one...And plus, you all woudn't shut up about it...

Bill: Aw'right!

Fay: Victory!!

Peppy: In my day, we'd shout (4)"HEIL!" not victory! Kids these days...

Hakkyou: So, get to asking each other your questions. I'll just be over here, reading. Tell me when you're all done.

Hakkyou sat down and engrossed himself in the book.

Fox: Hmm...Well, who's gonna ask the questions first? Personally, I think it should be-

Falco: Me!

Wolf: Me, obviously.

Katt: Me, no questions asked.

Slippy:...I'm kinda nervous...Me?

Krystal: I kinda like the idea: me!

Bill: Me. Just for fun.

Peppy:zzz...

Fay: Me! After all, I've barely gotten any attention!

Panther: Panther has agreed with Panther that Panther should go first. Although Panther would have greatly enjoyed being first to Panther for once...

Leon: FOOLS!! YOU SHAL KNEEL BEFORE THE GREAT LEON!!!...Who, coincidentally, is indeed going first.

Fox:...Slippy.

Slippy:...Wh-what?!

All of them stared open-mouthed at Fox, who simply shrugged.

Panther began to clap. The audience slowly began to clap, and then even the starfox crew joined in (Excepting a few extremely confused people: Wolf, Falco, Krystal, and even Slippy himself)

Hakkyou: The decision is made. None can turn back now; the game has begun.

Fox:...What?! GAME?!

Hakkyou: Hm? What? No, not like him!!... Besides, I was his downfall... Kinda... What i meant was: Start questioning. This might be interesting.

Fay: C'mon, Slippy! Ask Leon first...

Krystal: No! Ask Fox if he loves me!

Slippy:....Er...Uh...Um...PANTHER!!

Number One:Panther

Panther:!

Slippy:uh...To Panther: Have you ever been raped?

Panther: Why of course not..Panther hasn't...Panther..Panther...(Panther begins to cry, like the over sized Panther that he is. What?!)

Fox:..Errrrr......Oookaaayyy.....

Panther: Panther couldn't do anything! Panther was too weak...Panther...was the reason Panther was raped...Which is why I am now Panther, not that despicable creature that is Panther. That is a Panther long dead to Panther.

Falco: My brain hurts...

Slippy: Wow...I know what it feels like to be a reader now! Well, next one!

Wolf: he sure got confident fast.

Fox: Yeah...He'll be complaining about bogies any minute now, just watch.

Wolf looked at Fox in confusion

Wolf: And just what does all of this have to do with bogies?

Fox: Bogies? You know- Oh. that's what you're thinking. (sigh) You're really dense, Wolf.

Wolf: What?! I'm not dense!

Number Two:Krystal

Slippy: To Krystal: Are you a bounty hunter, who wears blueberry perfume? or or you a normal BLUE ANTHROPRMORPHIC vixen that wears blueberry scented perfume?

Krystal: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE- No, I'm just wearing bluebrrry perfume! Thanks for noticing!~

Fox: Hmm... She's not paying atten-

Krystal: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Bill: (5)Whoah. (Looks right) It goes all the way off the screen! That's a long scream...

Number Three:Falco

Slippy: R-right... Erm.. To Falco: Why are you always such an arrogant douchebag?! i mean, seriously! I went to make a sandwich- the likes of which Krystal could never enjoy- and just as I took out the bread, you swiped it, yelled "HANDS OFF MY BREAD!!" ran off with it, and left me with two pieces of cheese, some meat and lettuce. Douche.

Falco: yeah, well, I know the kind of meat you were holding... lluullululululululululullululullll!11eleven!!one!!

ROB: No, this statement is completely incorrect. Only Fox is gay enough to hold _that kind of meat_. I merely would like to point out the fact that he is an animal that is bipedal, can talk, and to top it off, is gay. You don't find freaks like that often, and his being gay just adds to it.

Fox: ..._

Wolf: ...Gay? :(

Hakkyou: ...Excuse me? T_T

Wolf&Hakkyou: I'M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!! Huh? What?! FUCK YOU!! I'M GONNA KILL HIM!!

Wolf: Heh! You couldn't kill him! Besides, I wanna tear him apart!

Hakkyou: Oh yeah?! I'll just have to beat you up first then!

Wolf: Good luck with that, shorty!-

Hakkyou: WHO'RE YOU CALLING A MINUSCULE ATOM ON THE SMALLEST PIECE OF DUST FLOATING AROUND IN A BEANSPROUT?!?!?!?!

Fox:...

Hakkyou: HEARTLESS INSULTS!!!

Wolf: HURTFUL COMEBACKS!!!

The two continue to fight, and are eventually ignored.

Falco: Whoah, I think Fox is broken...

Krystal: Fox..?

Fox:...That was mean...

Leon: Eh? Wha? Sorry, wasn't paying attention.

Fox:...Peppy ate the last piece of cake! And I'd already called it...

Falco: We're ignoring you now.

Number Four:Bill

Slippy: Well...Never let something like that happen again...Moving on!...!... To Bill: You know in the first chapters how youw ere stripping? Why? Why would you? I'm pretty sure some people would have reacted badly, but apparently nothing happened...

Bill: (Grimacing) Shadow kinda took things into his own hands...

All: not going there.

Fox: Anything that guy takes into his own hands is usually.... well, I don't know the words to describe it...

Hakkyou: Yeah. He is special that way... No offense, though.

Number Five: Katt

Slippy: That one was pretty uneventful... To Katt: You know, you're pretty much as widly known a sex symbol for starfox as Krystal is; how does that affect you? Has it gone to your head?

Katt: Of course not! By the way, do you guys like my clothes? (All of the...straight men stared at her in awe. Why? Because she was wearing skimpy clothing, that's be why.)

Krystal: Oh yeah? You only wore tight clothes when you were introduced! _I_ was wearing a bra and loin cloth!...Too bad I was rescued by a gay guy...

Number Six:Peppy

Slippy:..Right... Onto the next one....To Peppy: How was the cake? Did it taste better because you got the last piece?

Peppy's eyes began to twinkle with a light rarely seen. imagine Dumbledore, if you will.

Peppy: Ah, yes. It reminded me of waking up on the morning of the rising moon, its brilliant sliver glow bathing me in peace. Yes, Slippy. the cake was magnificent.

Fox: Hey! That's not fair! I even put a note on saying it's mine!-

Peppy: Shut up, youngin'! (Peppy proceeded to hit Fox over the head with Hakkyous book)

Fox: Ow! Wolf, help! I'm under attack from a giant rabbit that'll eat all of your cake!

Wolf: Fox?!

Fox: Don't bother with me.. It's too late...my cake...was...taken...destroy him...it's...our...only hope...blaraghaahgahgahgargh....

Fox stopped moving, about to laugh.

Wolf: Alright. I will- (Wolf noticed Peppy eating a piece of cake he'd been saving for later)

Wolf:...

Peppy: Nom nom nom...

Wolf:...

Peppy:Nom nom nom...

Wolf.. RUN EVERYONE!! IT'S TOO LATE FOR US!-

Peppy finished the cake.

Wolf: BALREARGHARARAHGAAHGARAAGHARGH!!!..(Wolf fell over)

Everyone run into the kitchen to protect their cake. All except for Hakkyou, who was staring coldly at Peppy.

Peppy: Whatsit, youngin'? Tell me, or I'll it yer cak too!

Hakkyou: I don't have any cake. But, you have my book. Hand it over, and no gets hurt.

Peppy: Eh? An' what if I wanna read it?

Hakyou: You can't.

Peppy: Why not?

Hakkyou: It. Is. _Mine_.

Peppy:I'm openin' it!

Hakkyou: No, you're not. (Hakkyou presses a button.)

Peppy: Eh?!- Kabloooom! Or something like that... exlpody sound affects? Sure.

Hakkyou catches the book, and continues from where he left off. Slowly, all of the cast come back into the room, while Fox and Wolf sit up, shaking their heads. The whole matter was quickly forgotten.

Number Seven:Fox

Slippy: Well Fox, your turn!

Fox: Oh, great. Just what I needed to see, your question! (Get it? Get it? What?! My genius is wasted here...)

Slippy: To Fox: Are you gay, or are you just pretending? I honestly can't tell for the life of me.

Fox: yes Slippy. As you have known for a few years now, I am gay.

Krystal: Wait, how does that work?

Fox: Well, we've been friends since we were kids, and I'm 21 now, soo....

Falco: Huh?! Only twenty one?! How does that work?! You're supposed to be around forty by the end of _Command_....

Hakkyou: Yeah... I guess I just decided to mesh all of the times together and reform it to my own liking. That's what a fanfictions supposed to be, right? Shaping a story in different ways so that it fits your pleasure and entertains those who read it?

Shadow: That's about right.

All of them look around, not seeing him. They soon gave up.

Number Eight: Fay

Slippy: To Fay: Where did you and Bill first meet?

Fay: Yay, I'm not last!

Wolf and Leon grumble.

Fay: Well, it was really weird, but we met on Fichina. For some reason, there was a base being attacked by invisible hippogriffs and I helped them out. Bill and I met when a Hippogriff that had escaped the radar attacked me from behind, and he shot it in the head-

Bill: I saw the footprints and guessed where the head would be-

Fay: And then we both stabbed it until we were sure it was dead. Ever since then, we've never been happier with each other.

Hakkyou: A truly bloody story...

Falco: I think I'm gonna puke...

Wolf: I've heard worse.

Leon: I've _done_ worse.

Wolf: Where do you think I've heard worse?

Fox: Good points.. But all the same...

Krystal: Why were there invisible hippogriffs anyhow?

(6#1)Bill: Apparently, some race was being had, and hippogriffs were used as the means of vehicles.

(6#2)Fay: it was supposed to be in a virtual reality, but they need to take pictures of the invisible hippogriffs for the simulation.

(6#3)Wolf and Fox grimaced at each other.

Slippy: I've never heard of anything like that... hey Fox, you okay? You look sick...

Leon: Yeah, you look a little weird too, Wolf...

(6#4)Wolf&Fox: TJ.

Hakkyou: let's not get into the matter...

Number Nine:Leon

Leon: OH YEAH!!!

Wolf: OH COME ON!!!

Slippy: Sorry Wolf, but like me, Leon is green, so I picked him...

Falco: (sigh) Sometimes Slip, you never cease to amaze me...

Slippy: To Leon: Why do you wear such tight clothes?

Leon: I'm not the only one who does.

Slippy: That's true...

Slippy noted Wolf, Fox, Falco, Katt, Krystal, Panther, Panther, Fay, Bill, and even Peppy and himself to be wearing tight clothes aside from Leon.

Hakkyou: You're dodging the question.

Leon scowled.

Slippy: That's right! _Why_ do you wear such skin tight clothes.

Leon: I'm not saying.

Wolf pointed his right index finger at Leon and took up an epic stance.

Wolf: Then you must suffer the consequences.

Leon: What's the worst that he could throw at me?

Slippy: You must chop down the mightiest tree in the forest...

Falco: (sigh) So typical of him...

Slippy: With a herring!

Leon:...What?

Fox: Judgment has been passed.

Krystal: You must journey east, to the mighty forest of Bordhir, and chop down the mightiest tree in the forest.

Peppy: With Herring in hand you shall down...

Leon(Muttering): You've gotta be joking...

Slippy: The Wispy Willow.

Kirby: Hiiiii!

Wolf: (exhales) Lucky! That could've been me!

Leon: Yeah well, don't count your fowl until you've shot them into a blooming rain of destruction.

Falco: Aaaawkward.

Leon(Grumbling): I'll see you guys later...Taxi! TAXI!!

_Number Ten_: Wolf

Wolf: Okay, I'm ready! Give me your best shot!

Slippy: Are you sure?-

Wolf: I don't care what rock you crawled out from- bring it!

Slippy: Rock?! That's insulting!! I'm gonna get you for that...

Wolf: Nothing you can dish out that I can't take care of.

Slippy: TO WOLF!!!: Whatever happened to your right eye? We've heard Shadows account, but we haven't heard yours...From this dimension, anyhow.

Wolf: really? That's all? Man, my eye's almost as Krystal being a bounty Huntress-

Krystal: UNEXPLAINED RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Bill: Yep. That's another screen leaving scream...(nods)

Falco: Hey! Set him up with a lie detector!

Slippy: Niiiice!

One lie detector later...

Wolf: All right. The way I lost my eye is.... I didn't lose my eye.

Slippy:...

Falco:...

Fox: Hey! The line's going straight! That means he's telling the truth!

Falco: yeah.. But.. But he's gay! And since he's gay, straight is crooked to him!

Even Peppy could tell he was lying.

Bill: That's pretty discriminatory... But it does _kinda_ make sense...

All agreed (Albeit a Hakkyou who refused to acknowledge them and a very glum Fox. Wolf was simply livid and yelling a few choice words.)

Falco: Right! Since the line is going straight!-

Fox: (Pointing at the sheet of paper) It's going all over the place now.

Indeed, the line was going criss-crossed and sometimes just diagonally.

Falco stared at it with his mouth open.

Wolf: I didn't lose an eye. It's just a scar, and the eye patch is just a trick. And the electric eye is just for aerial combat. Although it does scan stuff...

Fox: What kind of trick?

Wolf: Sorry, I don't have to answer that.

Hakkyou closed his book with a snap.

Hakkyou: Well, that ends this new installation. We will be holding these one characters randomly, and each will bring out very personal aspects of the characters. We here at Answers! hope that you'll continue to contribute to our clever show, and send in more questions! I would also like to take the time to tell you that I will hold a poll for who the next questioning charcter will be. once again: Thank you for tuning in, and see you again next time!

The lights on the stage fade away while the entire crew walks off, while the audience goes mad, some even foaming at the mouth. The words, _Sayonara, Bitches_ appeared on the large screens that were magically- sorry- scientifically floating around.

* * *

That took a lot more time than I thought it would.  
As explained, this will happen randomly, but after I've gotten enough votes for the next character who questions the others. Also, send in to the characters what you think the final question (for me) should be. Send all of your normal questions as well, but dont' forget: a good chapter is produced by reviews. Espescially when you're running a faniction that needs reviews so the questions can be answered..T3T

PS.~ I made a few notes, and they're just things I'd like to point out. here they are:

(1):_Why_ is a popular song made by Ayaka. It was used in Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII when Zack died to save CLoud. This, of course, made it even more popular.

(2):Don't you just love alliteration?

(3):Alliteration really is fun to use...

(4):I don't mean anything by it. I personally think the Germans are amazing. I mean, Adolf Hitler practically took over an entire counrty on his own. (He did have armies, but you know what I mean). But I'm not Neo-Nazi either. Just saying, some people should be recognized for their talent, and that includes world domination.

(5):I'm not sure whether or not I'm spelling whoah right... Help?

(6, Numbers 1, 2 and 3): Read the story McBrawled in the Super Smash Bros. section. You'll have a laugh and find out what i mean by invisible hippogriffs. If you don't mind some more Fox/Wolf, that is...It's light, so no worries. Hope you don't mind me referencing it SerpentPanda!

Later.


	13. Haggle flabble! I'm back, baby!

Hakkyou: I enter stage left, jump into the middle, and introduce our first questioner!... Oh.

Fox: What?

Hakkyou: This is kind of awkward… our first person thingy is Velk…

Velk walks in from a magical back door that had appeared in the middle of the stage.

Velk: Sup.

All: Same as usual.

Velk: To Hakkyou: Hey, 'Hak-a-fag'!.

Hakkyou: Somehow, I get the feeling that you're trying to make fun of my sexuality…

Hakkyou looks boredly at Velk then makes a gesture for him to continue.

Velk:To All: Did that get past the censors.

All: Well, seeing as though it's RIGHT there, you might be able to answer that yourself.

To Guys: your all f.a.g.s. I hate f.a.g.s. so you can all go F.u.c.k. each other in the a.s.s. ok F.u.c.k.e.r.s.?

well see ya b.i.t.c.h.e.s.

Hakkyou: For some reason, I think he may be a homophobe.

Wolf&Fox: No trouble for us.

Straightmales: But why did he call us gay??

Hakkyou: Because you are all so obviously gay.

Falco begins to angrily yell at Hakkyou.

Hakkyou: It's called sarcasm, douchebag.

Hakkyou: Now, get out of here, you…. Blank. Here's our next questioner!

A giant can of soda pop appears, and magically the lid pop open, shooting orange pop all over the place along with !

Hakkyou: So good to see you; there are towels if you'd like to dry off….Towels for all!!

Hakkyou begins throwing endless amounts of towels into the air. Many of the audience members begin to go wild, trying to grab their own pristinely white towels.

Bill: I FEEL INFINITE!!

Mr. Benzidrine: So do I! Now let's get rid of that buzz kill!

To the Girls: Drabble drabble ** ** drabble drabble party party sex sex sex and don't forget the VIOLENCE!

The girls began to continue this out of tune.

Mr. Benzidrine: I love that song.

Hakkyou: I've never heard of it, actually. Is it alright if I call you Mr.B, by the way?

Mr. B: Sure!

To Hakkyou: I CALL GUEST HOST IN ONE OF YOUR CHAPTERS!!

Hakkyou: Oh, Mr. B! You're so silly- you already are!!

Mr. B: Really? Whaha-Yeah!!!!

Everything goes really mellow, while for some reason, Hakkyou and Mr. B float into the air slowly, preparing to give each other the high-five of FRIENDSHIP.

Hakkyou: Alright, enough of that nonsense.

Mr. B: To Shadow:…You don't know who I am-

Shadow: I DON'T KNOW WHO HE IS!!!

He points at Mr. B, dancing on the spot and yelling at Hakkyou.

Hakkyou: If you'd been listening, you'd know his name was Mr. B.

Metal: Ooooooooooooooooh You. Just. Got. THUNDER-SEEEEEEEEEERVED!!

Metal slides across the stage on his knees, playing the solo from Knights of Cambodia. ((I think that's the song name. I don't listen to enough rock/metal to know.))

Slippy wipes a tear away: Rock on, Metal. Rock on!

A montage of all of the great times that metal has played guitar begin playing. After it ends, all of the audience is crying. Hakkyou nodding his head, Fox staring at the screen in awe, and all of the rest of the Starfox crew blubbing about the place.

Mr. B: HAHA! YOU LIVE IN A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE! I live in teh atlantic time zsone, so... a good 4 hours ahead of you. Bring a dollar for lunch tomorrow. m sailsbury steak.

Shadow: So? YOU live in a different time zone! HAHA!! Medium or rare done? (Begins salivating)

The two then begin to salivate next to each other, thinking of the Salisbury steak that would surely begin a wonderful friendship.

Shadow: I still don't know you.

To Hakkyou: You look left out. What is your favorite song? Favorite Genre? Favorite band? Favorite CD?

Hakkyou: You… think I look left out? I… I-I… I never thought this day would come… Stay strong…Stay strong… if you cry, I will stab you, with a pencil.

All: 00

Hakkyou: Well, right now my favourite song is Someday. It's off a video game called The World Ends With You. My favorite genre is Indie- what did you expect? Metal? I don't really listen to CD's, I always download my music.

Leon : I listen to cl-

All: WE DON'T CARE WHAT YOU THINK!!!!

Leon : :'(

Mr. /b/: Guess what? That was four questions in one!...Shit…!

(Get it? Get it? Mr. /b/? I wish some /b/tards were here to enjoy that joke…)

To Bill: Oddly enough, you're my absolute favorite character in the series, despite having no story, no major parts, and the fact that my brother thought you were a duck the first 10 days we owned SF64.

Bill smiles brightly, then walks into a conference room. He throws the doors wide open

Bill: GIRUGAMESH!!!!

Everyone breaks into laughter, clutching their sides and rolling on the floor.

Katt: This is why we should have him here more often!

Wolf: I chuckled.

To Fay: I hate you.(Fay gasps, and tears gather in her eyes) No I don't! I'm just making conversation!

Fay: Oh, well that's cool! Hey, did you hear about Miley Cyrus-

Wolf: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Wolfs jumps up, takes out his gun, and fires randomly. Later, it was confirmed that his bullet hit Miley Cyrus, who had been in the audience. No one cared.

Fay:…o_O

Fox: He doesn't like Miley Cyrus much…

To Ness , Lucas, and Clause: GO BACK TO THE MOTHER 3/EARTHBOUND SERIES!

Ness : Okay!

Clause: But I have so much to learn from their technoilogy!!

Lucas: I can't leave without my pet rope snake!... Oh, Snekky, where are you?!

To All: That's all **. Remember: I'm happy peppy JeRrY!

Hakkyou: ! I didn't make that connection before!

Mr. B disappears in a wave of Happiness.

Hakkyou: Wow… That blew my mind… next up is: Fox Fighter 220~!

To Fox: WTF why are you gay?

Fox:: (Points at Wolf)

To Wolf: WTF why are you gay?

Wolf: Why are you straight?

To Falco: why are you such a gaytard?

Falco: Hands off my dignity!!...sniff sniff

To Katt Krystal and Fara: back room 10:00 be there

Krystal: Foursome?

FF: Foursome.

Katt: Foursome!

Fara: Foursooome!

To Fara: why the heck is your last name pheonix?

Fara: Ask Jesus. No, seriously, SFL has some good connections with Him.

To Fay: I saw you naked gigity!

Fay: I did too!!!

To Fox: do you hate slippy?

Fox: not so much, now that Hakkyou's easing up on him. (looks proudly at Slippy, who wasn't picking his nose or doing something Slippy-esque.)

Hakkyou: it's true. I realized I can make hima better person.

FINAL QUESTION

TO HAKKYOU: why the heck did you agree to do this fic anyways? oh and everybody hates gays you gaytard (no offence I just want this to be funny as possible)

Hakkyou: Agree? My dear, misguided FF… I CREATED THIS FIC!!

And not everybody hates me.. Timid, Shadow and I get along well. And Metal, too. And, and, WTDMTN!! And other people I don't remember… Like Mr. B! (Hakkyou smiles, remiscining about the time they high-fived. Epicly). And you know what? It's getting really old. (Walks away from FF, and takes out his cell phone. He presses a couple of button, and a giant laser obliterates him.)

Hakkyou: You'd be annoyed too if people wouldn't stop being douchebags about your sexuality, too.

Looks angrily at where FF lay on the floor.

Mr. b: Hey! Look! Old questions I digged up!

Hakkyou: Fire away!!

To Wolf: Here. Entertain yourself *Hands a DS and Diamond.*

Wolf: Err, don't you have anything… Better?

To Bill: I used an action replay and changed every one of your lines to: "I suck boys off for free. Me so horny." And when you die, everyone says HAHAHAHA!

Bill: Oh, yeah, I remember that. It was a delightable time.

To Hakkyou: No, i really didn't, but i thought it would be... um... funny!

Hakkyou:…Sorry, But I couldn't find out what you said… refresh my memory?

To Wolf: Sheesh! Sorry! I didn't mean to bring back memories of your childhood!

Wolf:…. (looks around) Which chapter was this in?

To Ness : You psychic **! PAULA LOVES YOU! YOU BROKE HER HEART!

Nees begins crying. Clause and comforts him. Lucas wails in despair of his lost Snekky.

To Hakkyou: Don't you just love EarthBound?

Hakkyou: I'm glad you asked. My friends gonna give me a download, and I actually can't wait.

Hakkyou: Wow. Spanish Japanese song… Not interested.

Mr. B: That burns me deep.

Hakkyou turns to Shadow: Got any questions?

Shadow: DO I?? J

To Hakkyou: I don't know if I've told you this, but Mr. Saw I back and wanting revenge. Be careful, I think he has inside help to destroy us.

Hakkyou: Inside help? Surely not… What , d'you think it's that cardboard box over there.

Said cardboard box begins to sweat nervously

Shadow: I guess you're right….

To Panther: Ya know what? Shadow can do shadow things to shadows with his shadow powers. Shadow's shadow powers also allow him to do shadowy shadow things to other people...and their shadows. So you see, Shadow can shadowly talk like a retard while he does shadowy shadow things to your face while you're staring at Shadow and his shadow.

Panther: Do you think that Panther does this merely for fun? Do you think that Panther talks like this because he is in love with himself? Well, that is untrue. If you must know, my religion is that of the Sacred Panther- The Panther who raised the moon, so that the panther can hunt in the night. Panther has always followed His Way, and shall not deviate. Panther would also like to say that Panther thinks Shadow is not quite as good as Shadow. And Panther also thinks he smells like expired milk.

Timid: I TRY to get him to bathe….(All jokes, all jokes. No seriously, I bet you smell like amazing. Urgh, now I sound like I'm coming onto you… Ina dismissive way…)

To the girls: If you had any power over Hakkyou, what would you do? See, I respect women, so never say I don't.

Women: We would probably make him not gay, but able to remember that he HAD been.

Hakkyou: D:

To the girls: So, given your answer...(He casts a shadow spell on them, and they have whatever power they want.) *Vampire laugh* Attack him, my pretties!

They all attack him. Hakkyou taps buttons on his cell phone rapidly. They close in on him, but freeze completely when he finishes.

Hakkyou: Oh mai gawd, that was close…

To Wolf: *in a low voice* I have something to tell you.

Wolf: What be it, matey?

To Wolf: *whispering* Come closer.

Wolf, grumbling: Are you coming onto me? (Does so anyways)

To Wolf: *whispering next to his ear* ...I smell dead people. They smell like you, and you smell like expired beef and cheese.

Wolf: Err, no, that's not me, it's Falco… it turns out that the bread he stole from Slippy was soaked in gross…

To everyone: Hey everyone. *Sharp claws come out of the tips of his fingers. He brings them up to a chalk board and slowly scrapes his claws across it slowly*

Hakkyou frowns at Shadow. He takes out his cell phone and deletes the chalkboard.

Shadow: Lame. :(

To Krystal: So, if Fox is gay, then who are you with?

Krystal: Anyone… I could be with you, if I wanted…

To everyone: Well, that's all. Don't stop being prodigious, minna-san (everyone)! JA MATA (Good bye)!

Hakkyou: One, Weeabo. Two, is that what ja mata means?

Shadow: L and yes. JA MATA!! ( I have no idea why there are L's there. I didn't type them in...)

Shadow walks off into the glorious sunrise. (D'you see what I did? Instead of sunset, I put sunrise!.... Screw you)

Hakkyou: Well, that's it… That chapter wasn't all that good. Oh well.

Leon : Give us some more questions, ja?

Wolf: Leon ! I didn't know you were Norwegian!

Fox: Wooolf? I wanna go to bed.

Wolf: Then go. I just found out my team mate is Norwegian!! J (WTF J???!!!)

Fox: but I don't wanna go alone!

Wolf follows Fox to some place. I don't know where. Maybe they went ot the Great Fox. Yeah, they went to the Great Fox.

Alltheguys: Grumble grumble…

Fara; I always knew he'd turn out gay anyways.

Hakkyou: Well, I suppose that's all. And now for counting time with Sho Minamimato!

Sho: Thanks, Hakkyou. Zetta cool.

Hakkyou: Thanks.

Sho: I see one brain-dead binomial (Falco) on disgusting yoctagram (Slippy) three zetta bitchy bitches... And one of them are wierdly colored...(Main girls) I'm pretty sure two heteropascals just left here (I'll let you guess this one) and one seriously cool yoctogram. (Me. And all of the readers, if they feel like a morality boost)

Hakkyou: Always a pleasure, Sho.

Sho: Sine! Likewise

Naaaaa na na na nanana na na Katamari Damacyyyy!!~

Naaaaa na na na nanana na na Katamari Damacyyyy!!~

(All of the others join in)

Naaaaa na na na nanana na na Katamari Damacyyyy!!~

Naaaaa na na na nanana na na Katamari Damacyyyy!!-Yeah~


	14. God revealed Retarded Unicorns Galore!

The stage is dark, when suddenly, a drum roll starts! The stage is lit up, and the camera zooms in on each persons face, each of them possessing a goofy expression. Except for the more serious people. They simply look bemused. How do I know this? I'm your Narrator… God, of course!

Hakkyou: That's enough exposition out of you, God!

Grumble Grumble.

Hakkyou: So, we've got some questions. I… I just wanted to reassure you guys I'm not starting up a stupid side story again. I didn't enjoy that…

All: Neither did we.

Hakkyou nods approvingly

Hakkyou: Well, let's cut to the…errr, script? Certainly not the chase, so early into this…

Leon : You're somewhat different, you know (Squints at him)

Hakkyou: I've mellowed, but enough digression. Introducing, DARK!!!

Dark: I SAID CALL ME 'VENOM'!!!! (Hits Hakkyou around the head)

Hakkyou: Alright, alright… Well, since you got here… somehow

Dark: Let's not go into that.

All: Let's…not. Let's not. We forgot to say not. Wait, are we all speaking at the same time??

God: Yes you are!

Hakkyou: HEY!!! YOU STAY IN ITALICS!!!!

Grumblegrumblehobaggrumbleraginghomosexualgrumble.

Hakkyou: You're lucky you don't really exist. Take this, imagination!! But enough digression. Dark?

Dark: (Hits Hakkyou) Yes, you're right. Thanks. To EVERYONE: Soon…. Soon….

(All is my thing, thankyouverymuch.)

Dark: (A roll of the eyes) To Krystal: Do you want to multiplex?

Krystal: I'm not sure… It sounds like some sort of building blueprint…

Dark: (Raises his eyebrow) Allow me to explain, since Hakkyou is obviously too lazy to look it up.

Hakkyou: We here at Answers Corp. like to make our viewers feel more involved.

Wolf: Well rehearsed.

Hakkyou: It was improvised, but thanks nonetheless.

Dark: To Katt: Can I do you? Pleeeeaaaaase???

Katt: Who are you again? And are you legal?

Falco Hands off my prey!!

(Don't worry, you probably just perceive yourself as sick. You are what you pretend to be, and your thoughts create your world. Sorry, I'm a bit of a philosophical person. ^_^)

Dark: Chill, man! Chill! It's all in good fun!... If you get what I mean! Whoa! CHILL!!!

Leon : Roast him.

Dark: To EVERYONE: Who's ?

Hakkyou: (looks at all concerned)… Believe me, ignorance is bliss in this situation… Until such a later date that you may have to be notified. You could possibly be dead by then, but whatever.

Dark: Thanks for being honest, anyways… To Fox: U. G.A.Y

Fox: -_-' Those aren't my initials. They're not my initials at all. YES I KNOW I'M GAY YOU IDIOT!!! Am I supposed to be ashamed? (Glares threateningly. I mean, this guy probably works out and stuff. Seriously, he could mess you up for-pretend.)

Dark:… Err, just… Making sure…?... To EVERYONE: AHAAHAHAHAhaahhaa, I've seen another guy do it.

Hakkyou: (Crosses his arms) You mean sex? Were you taping it for him or something? Or did you accidentally walk into your college mate's dorm room while he was doing 'it' because you forgot he likes to be 'alone' on Sundays…?

Wolf: Did you post it on facebook and stuff? To humiliate him?

Leon : Was it Panther? You can always see that guy having sex. Even when he's just sitting in a chair.

Dark:… maybe I'll tell you guys later (Both: Laame) Whatever. To Falco: Are you a guy?

Falco: Even though I've been around Hakkyou, and beaten up/tortured by him, yeah, I am.

Dark: Huh. It's jus tthat eyeliner-

Falco: IT'S NOT EYELINER!!!!

All: O_O

Falco: It… It's not…

DarkI: Whoa…'kay… Um. To Me: Hey, how's it going.

DarkII: Did I got o law school with you?

DarkI: No, I think I remember seeing you in an elevator once.

DarkII: Really? I really thought…

DarkI: Actually…

Dark: To Bill: Where's Fay?

Bill: Still tied up… Shit! I forgot!! (Runs off in some obscure direction. Most likely a wall- but don't worry, he'll figure it out. I hope so. God bless him.)

Hakkyou: Wait. Did you just say- (Tries to talk, but is silenced.)

Dark: To E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E: ps3x-box

Hakkyou: (Crosses his arms and frowns.)

Wolf&Fox: (Look around, confused)

Girls: (Begin gossiping about the newest sandwich model. Yeah, I just went there.)

The Rest: (Aren't paying attention.)

All: We just don't get it.

Dark sighs.

Dark: To EEVVEERRYYOONNEE: well im going and yes i am a very sick man im not going down with out comeing on someones Q&A

WELL BUY ALL AHAHAHA IM GOING OUT WITH A BOOM (puts down a bomb and runaways and jumps in car) SEE YA AHAHAHAHA

Hakkyou: (Waves serenely) Byyyeeee! Have fun with that!

Shadow:… Aren't you gonna do something about that bomb.?

Hakkyou: Nah.

All:… But there's a timer… for t-20 seconds…

Hakkyou: (Looks at his knuckles)

The timer goes off. Nothing happens.

All: ?

Shadow: How'd you know it was a dud?

Hakkyou: Because, this is my own little world, and I magically made the bombs switch.

Far off, a small light is seen.

All: Nice.

Velk: Sup?

Hakkyou: nothing much, you?

Velk: Same, just that I wanted to tell you that people are stealing my good name AGAIN. So, you know.

Hakkyou: We don't blame you.

Velk: Cool. I'm just gonna go chill in the crowd

Shadow: Later

Hakkyou waves

Hakkyou: And now we have…………… No, not ellipses, but HakkyouXXX!

(This entire review is fictional. I myself put this here, just to clear up any discretion)

HakkyouXXX: To Hakkyou: HAHAAHA!! IT IS I, YOUR EVIL TWIN WHO LIKES TO SHOUT A LOT !!

Hakkyou: Oh no.

E Hakkyou : YES!! I AM HERE TO TAKE OVER YOUR Q&A FIC!! PREPARE YOURSELF!

(Evil Hakkyou pulls out a gun and shoots Hakkyou. Hakkyou falls as if in slow motion, creating a graceful arc to the floor, where he fell, and lie dead)

All: Oh noez!!

Evil Hakkyou: MWAHAHAHAHA! NO THIS FIC BELONGS TO- BWA!!

Hakkyou: YOU FORGOT I HAD ADDITIONAL PILONS, BEOTCH!

(Hakkyou sends in additional nuclear pylons, and for good measure, Erases E. H.)

Hakkyou: Ha. This is why I don't send myself questions.

Shadow: The first person to count how many times "Hakkyou" Is said in there wins a chance to be co-host!

Krystal: I'm the booth babe!~

Whoopee Goldberg: Daaamn, girl!

Hakkyou: Where's Cthulu?

Whoopee Goldberg: He busy eatin some fish, yo.

Hakkyou: Word.

All:…?!

Hakkyou: And now we have Fox Fighter 220!.... Does he look different, or is it just me…

Wolf: Get some glasses.

Hakkyou: -_-

FF220(?):ok to clear one thing up, I'm Straight... but I'm not a homophobe... and just to prove I'm not all against gayness I'll have a gay moment today, just wait a few questions

Hakkyou: We're all so proud of you, here at Hakkyou Corp.

Fox: The name changed?

Hakkyou: Yeppers.

FF220(?): To the three girls: howd you like our 10:00 meeting? heh heh...

Girls: We loved your 10:00 meeting, yout studly man muffin! Let's have another one! But earlier!!

FF220(?): To Hakkyou: your gay... I HATE YOUR DAMN REVEIWS FOR MY STORY! cept the most recent one 's alright...

Hakyou: (Smirks) my gay what? And yeah, they'll get better.

FF220(?): To Krystal: how you doin' sexy?

Krystal: Depends how horny you are, Studly Guy Man. Except replace Guy with Woman attracting.

FF220(?): To Hakkyou: if you don't notice I'm showing my complete straightness before the gay moment... keep in mind I AM STRAIGHT!

Hakkyou: I commend you on your straightery.

FF220(?):To Wolf: your gay, and your with Fox... you do know he's your cousin right?

Wolf: (Also smirks) My gay what? And my what with Fox? And, like Hakkyou said, this is its own little universe. A completely different world from your own, where whimsy is solid determination and fiction is the same side of the coin as fact. Yes. Welcome to Wonderland, Alice !

FF220(?)To Hakkyou: YOU'VE GOT INCEST GAYS ON YOUR SHOW! incest is one thing I can not tolerate!

Hakkyou: Please refer to the above novel! (In a cheery voice!)

ok here's the damned gay moment (Oho? God doesn't approve)

*walks up to Hakkyou and kisses him on the lips*

*turns to everyone* THAT NEVER HAPPENED! I AM S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T STRAIGHT AS A STRAIGHT PERSON CAN BE! that was just to prove I'm not a homophobe... and if I get dissed for that I'm gonna punch someone in the face!

Hakkyou: (Is just standing there)

FF220(?): To Hakkyou: sorry about you being the subject of the gay moment... but kissing one of them (referring to Wolf and Fox) wouldn't have proved my point...

Hakkyou: (Is still just standing there.)

Leon : Dude… He's actually speechless.

FF220(?):To Krystal: I have to get rid of the gayness... let's go to the room back there...

Krystal: I'm nto sosure anymore. Your reputation is falling all around you!

FF220(?): To Fox & Wolf & Hakkyou: stay the f.u.c.k. away from me...

Hakkyou: (Is still just standing there)

Fox: Why would we cheat on each other?

Wolf: Also, I don't think you're of age for anything I'd want to do…

FF220(?): To Everyone: that made me sick I gotta go...

All: We can relate (Except for Hakkyou, as he is still just standing there.)

FF220(?): To Everyone: and keep in mind none of this was real... I'm not even real I'm a figment of you effing imagination so leave me the f.u.c.k. alone...

P.S. I wasn't gonna submit this revweiw but what tah heck... I might as well... I AM NOT GAY! I AM STRAIGHT DAMN IT STRAIGHT! I'm going to go cut myself now... *a knife appears in hand* see ya later...

All: Yeah… bye…

Suddenly, a gun shot rings through the air, and things get even more quiet than when Hakkyou and FF kissed. You know? Like, from a couple of seconds ago? BUT HERE'S THE TWIST!!!

FF220(?): W---wha..? (He holds his chest, then he removes a hand covered in blood. He falls down and begins to grovel around on the floor, getting more blood on the ground and slowly bleeding out. Everyone stares as FF220 lowers his gun, his eyes cold.)

Wolf: I think… I think my mind just punched itself…

Leon :… Waaaaiiiit…. (Looks at a smirking Hakkyou)

Hakkyou: Of course I knew about this. I created it. You could call this story a symphony, and I could, metaphorically, be it's composer. (Giggle giggle. But not in a girly way, just a small laugh.)

FF220: Sorry, I got drunk and my friend thought it would be funny to put that there.

Hakkyou: No problem. Although I must say.. He's a good kisser.

FF220: Okay. I'm outta here.

Hakkyou: (Smirkity smirk smirk) See you, Heterosexual Man Guy Whom Attracts All of the Ladies With his Incendiary Nipples. (Giggle)

FF220: (Rolls his eyes and walks away)

Me: See? I told this would go well.

You: Yeah, whatever.

Hakkyou: Hey. Get out of here, you're breaking the fourth wall.

Me: Damn, I hate those fines…

Hakkyou: That's why I'm your proxy

I disappear. WHWVW:H

Shadow: You think kind of weird.

Hakkyou: Just in a more tangled up sort of complex way. Next up we have … Fox Fighter220, but since we've covered his review, I'd say we can skip this.

Shadow: Instead, we bring you VenomDark!

Dark: Back again.

Hakkyou: Did you ever really leave?

Dark: No. That was all kind of funny. To Hakkyouto: haha u a funny guy and ur still calling me venom and if u don't im going on ur **

Hakkyou: I'll just let you put that as your next review.

to everyone: im kiding just kiding

Shadow: You don't joke about that guy… Seriously.

well buy again HAHA ur still funny than other Q&A m8

All: Bye, Venom.

Hakkyou: (Sigh)

Suddenly, an explosion of pixie dust and imploding fairies appeared, making a wormhole through the power of 1up mushroom and paraplegic elephants. Out of this wormhole came a dragon dressed in what I suppose a monk would wear. His scales were, and are, to this day, shiny silver and he had, and has, to the day, star dust off of him. Or maybe cocaine. Whichever he snorted, but I digress. Oh. Right. His monk-y clothes were green. Thought you ought to know.

StarlightDragon: greetings maby shadow told you about me or not but allow me to introduce myself. i am the the dragon of the stars starlightdragon

Hakkyou: (Hakkoyu stares at him as if he had been reading a book when a unicorn that had no doubt just arrived from the Special Olympics had broke through his ceiling and began rummaging through his waste bin, no doubt looking for cocaine. Or stardust. What? I don't have any; ask that shiny thing over there.)

STD: To Wolf: you know you have your own theme song? and if you do why does it sound sad?

Wolf: yeah, I'm the one who hummed it up and decided: "Hey, Shigeru Miyamoto, Katsuya Eguchi, Yoichi Yamada, Takaya Imamura! I just thought this song up, we should totally make it in the game!" "Ooh, this song very kawaii desu. We make good version" And it's not. It's supposed to sound determined, focused, taunting, and maybe a tad bit melancholy. Oh, did I mention wrathful? Assault just kind of botched it…

Leon : Big time.

STD: to whoever it applies to: why does corneria suck so much i mean the army is just plain pathetic with the exeption of the bulldog squad.

WHOMever it applies to:

-Fox: Yeah, it does suck. Why d'you think we're there?

-Falco: Only cuz they need us so bad.

-Bill: Hey… We're good at what we do… We just like Starfox's company…

-Krystal: From what I've learned, they're pretty useless on their own.

-Katt: I'm a mercenary; I don't care.

-Slippy: Well, we've made lots of advancements in technology, but for some reason, Corneria is never prepared for war…

-Wolf; Why do you think I chose Andross' side?... Aside from the money…

-Hakkyou: Yeah. I hate saving them all of the time. It gets annoying. Oh, when I say this, I mean I've played the games before.

STD: Farewell, and tell Shadow that I was here, knave.

Hakkyou:.. You don't mean me, right?

STD: Until next time, short one! My ride is here. (Starlightdragon then jumps on the unicorn Hakkyou had recently imagined. No doubt the image was so powerful, he imagined it into existence.)

Hakkyou: Later, Sexually Transmitted Disease!

Fox: Hey, I just noticed that!

Panther: Panther laughs at the words his initials make. Ha ha ha.

Lon: Were have you been?

Panther: Leon , where am I usually? Having sex in some obscure place, with some obscure person., and sometimes the obscure object.

Wolf: What'd you expect?

Leon : I dunno. I just don't know.

Hakkyou: Well, I think that covers all of the questions.. If I missed anyone, just rage at me. Until next time! Oh, and don't take any of that offensively, STD. Really, you just gave me the ammunition there. I'm a cynic- sue me.

This is God, signing off.

…lulbai.

Well, that wasn't too bad, now was it? Once again, if I forgot anyone's reviews, shout at me. I might- JUST MIGHT- hear you. And a final time, LSD trip Sexually Transmitted Disease, if you had read the previous chapters, you could have anticipated me ripping into you like that. If people take offense to what I say, then go die. No. Really. Take a knife and kill yourself. I don't want you ranting at me because I INDIRECTLY insulted you. And Foxfighter, I told you it'd work out. Hang in there. Hang in there.


	15. HMMWUA Tries To Steal The Show

Again? So soon? Some of you may be asking, "Hakkyou, you crazy! Why are you updating so much recently!?!?!?kawaiidesu?!?!" Well, the answer is FUCK YOU. No, not really, it's okay. It's just that I have exams tomorrow, and I feel the need to do some thing fun. Like exercise my brain. It's gotten fat and lethargic because I've been doing my studies more than drawing in class _ But enough jibber jabber. ONWAAAA-

(This is a small disclosure. When I said "INDIRECTLY" at the end of the last chapter, that was meant as a joke. The upper case indicates sarcasm. In fact, the whole tirade at the end was a joke. It's hard to emote over the information super high way.) -RDS!!

This is your host, God, who most definitely did not speak to you one page break ago!

Hakkyou: Yes, yes, thank you, God.

SFL: PRAAAAISE JESUS!!

(Entire cast on Interview with StarFox): PRAAAAAAAAAAISE JESSUUUUS!!!!!11

Hakkyou: (Lifts an eyebrow) Well, we have some SUPREME questions today. Of course, supreme meaning heterosexual.

Just then, Joe made an entirely non spontaneous entrance via… Err, somehow. I wasn't watching.

Joe: Hey hey heyyyy- WHAT'S UP??

Hakkyou: Err, well-

Joe: Ladies (Wiggle wiggle wiggle said the eyebrows)

Ladies: Heterosexual Manly Man whom all Women are Unquestionably Attracted to. But let's call you HMMWUA for short… Unlike you.

Audience: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Hakkyou: Just… just ask the questions…

Joe: Whatever, short and girly (WHAT?!)To Hakkyou:*trying to keep from laughing, but not succeding* HA HA HA HA HA! my friend started to spit and clean his tongue when you said he was a good kisser!

Hakkyou: (Smirk/giggle) He shouldn't be so modest, really… We must spend more quality time together (smirksmirksmirk)

Joe: And also, if you don't EVER put me as the subject of your gay comments I wouldn't mind being friends, so, what do ya say? *holds out his hand to shake hands*

Hakkyou: (Shrugs) Whatever helps you sleep at night… (Shakes hand) Ewww… Your hands are all sweaty!....

Joe: ///

Hakkyou: That… That's just gross! Blegh. I'm washing this before I have to incinerate it…

Joe: You suck. Is it my fault if I was playing an intense video game…?

Wolf: I think he got the wrong message there, mate

Joe: Oh. Whatever. To Dark: heh heh, looks like you finnaly got into a Q&A but not as the name you want!

Dark: DAMMIT! CALL ME VENOM!! V&*%^(Dark) SMASH!! RAAAWR!!!

Joe:To Fox&Wolf: why the hell are you two gay anyways? what happened, *thinks for a second* scratch that, I know, Hakkyou happened...

Hakkyou: How astute of you. You know, it's not possible that they could actually have feelings for each other or something…

Wolf: We would tell you the story, but you'd probably get bored.

Fox: Yeah. A rare miss.

Joe: Lucky, more like. To Krystal: hey hottie

Krystal: (In her most ho-baggity clothes, her nano skirt covering a whole 3 inches of her legs, with her sad piece of cloth on her chest. Whoops. It's actually a shirt.) Heyyy HMMWUA.. (Suggestive wink)

Joe: To Everyone: oh BTW I do have a girlfriend

Badunk.

Girls; What d'you mean, girlfriend… (Joe is quickly strapped into a chair, where all he can do is tremble in fear.)

(Straight) Guys (Without girlfriends): Lucky bastard…

Hakkyou: Sigh… I want a boyfriend…

Joe: Ha. Loner (I'LL CHAR YOUR BONES BLACK!!) To Hakkyou: ... you broke the fourth wall!

All:…So?

Joe: You revealed life outside of the story…

Copyrighted Characters: We've broken that wall many a time. Get with the times, old man.

Joe: To Hakkyou: call me Joe not FF220, its extremely annoying when people put FF220...

Hakkyou: (Giggle/smirk) Consider it done… Is this some new kink of yours? (Sorry, I had to. It's just too fun making straight guys squirm! This must be how girls feel like when they have guys on a leash… Except I'm more or less trying to tie you to a dead sheep. Enjoy the mutton)

Joe: joe isn't amused.

Panther: Panther is bisexual (Panther then gets into a fight with himself, where Panther brutally kicked Panther's shin for revealing Panther's deepest secret)

Fox: just how many Panthers are there??

Wolf: I've counted 34 so far…

Joe: To Falco: IT IS! IT IS EYELINER! YOU LIAR!

Falco: YOU'RE THE LIAR!!!

Joe then dumps a bucket of water over Falco, and the red runs away from his eyes, leaving the area blue

Joe: TRIUMPH!!!

Falco fell over and cried. But no one cared.

Joe:To Katt: you had sex with a minor XP

Katt: And you had sex with a piece of this kid's imagination.

Joe: Thanks for that slap into reality. To Krystal: so did you XP

Krystal: I would make a funny response, but my shorts are ripping!!

Joe: :[] (Some time later) To Miyu: and you too XP

Miya: (Is busy being not a typical whore)

Joe: To Everyone: E=MC2 means Energy equals mass times the speed of light squared, its used to find the amount of potential energy an object has... O_O where the HELL did that come from?

Hakkyou: Einstein, if I'm correct.

Joe: To Hakkyou: you live in Canada right? so does my girlfriend, I wonder if you know her...

Hakkyou: Oh, yeah, sure I do. Because here in Canada , we know EVERYONE from Nova Scotia to British Columbia . Because we have such a SMALL ECONOMY. In fact, I have a next door neighbor from the MOTHA FUCKIN' YUKON. I WILL BITCH SLAP YOU YOU SON A OF AN INDISTINGUISHED NHIALIST ASSOCIATION PROVAKING CLOWN SPANKING PIG SHAGGER!

Joe:… Sorry…? To Harold: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU AND WHY THE HELL DO YOU KEEP CALLING ME?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Harold: Is unable to answer the phone right now. Please leave a message after the beep. QUACK.

Joe: To everyone: +_-' in reality somebody named Harold does keep calling my phone, eventually I'm going to track the guy down and kill him...

Hakkyou: (Makes a face) Eewwww, creepy stalker guy! I HATE CREEPERS!! And greasy hair…

Joe: To no on in particular: DING! your cookies are ready! *cough Game Called "Furcadia" cough*

All: WE DON'T GET THE REFEREEEEENCE!!!! (Point at him accusingly.)

Joe: To Falco: *shoots him with a tranquilizer and locks him in a room with a hungry (but not for food *evil laugh*) lion*

Hakkyou: Ewwwwww!

Girls: He earned it.

Guys: Wow. That's just cruel…

Hakkyou: IT'S AN ANIMAL!! THAT'S JUST GROSS!!!!!!! Blegh.

Joe: I thought you had some sort of Wolf complex… Isn't he an animal?

Hakkyou: I've said it before, "If he were human" Not into non existent and interspecies relationships.

Joe: To Krystal, Katt, & Miyu: so how does it feel to know you broke the law? you know, by having relations with a minor? HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Girls: Yeah, but it was worth it, you Studly Hunk of Manliness and Testosterone. You heterosexual guy, you.

Joe: To Everyone: GOD I FEEL EVIL TODAY! HA HA HA HA HA! *his eyes begin to turn Black* HA! *he begins to wreak havoc*

Hakkoyu: I swear if you don't stop I'll kiss you full on the lips

Joe: I'll be good. (Whimper)

Hakkyou: (Frowns) It's not like there's a crustacean in my mouth or something….

(One of the three Men that I saw half naked (Shirt-wise) in the past week): Hey, you there, skinny and pleasingly effeminate boy, have a manly kiss (Manly kiss given)

Hakkyou: Random hawt stranger! I had no idea you were…

This goes on in a funny way, while Shadow steps in for Hakkoyu. That homosexual, him. But damn… at least he's getting guys… HE'S GETTING THE GUYS THAT I THOUGHT WERE HAWT!! WHAT GIVES?!?!!?

Shadow: Sorry, J, but looks like that fish, that fish and that fish all got away.

There was never a chance we'd even be a sea next to each other. ;;_;;

Shadow: great, now J's crying. Well, let's just have some more questions… From me!

To Hakkyou: Yours, funnier than mine? I can't accept that. NOT ONE BIT!

Hakkoyu: Oh, come on, we have different senses of humour, and my cynical version just happens to appeal to others more than yours does- CAN WE DEAL WITH THIS WITHOUT TESTOSTERONE FUELED FIGHTS?!? (NO!) (Assaults him with the 8 Triagrams 128 Palms attack, follows up with the Primary and Hidden Lotus, and uses the Finale Rasengan. Unfortunately, the Hawt Stranger used his shear testosterone levels and age difference to stop Shadow from getting close). I'm the ruler of the Q&A War! YOU HEAR THAT, VENOM?!?!?!?! I AM NOT LOSING!! I'm just too busy to update every damn week like the others!

To Fox: ...Barry Manilow, let me guess?

Fox: Errr… I actually don't know what you mean…

To Wolf: More...Barry Manilow...And some Jonas Brothers thrown in? Jonas Brothers are gay, and love brother on brother incest, I tell you what. I just know it. Don't be fooled by those abstinence rings or anything, they TOUCH each other!

Wolf: Niether, and you think that's bad? YOU dress up as a dinosaur and attend children's birthday parties, and hen start putting the cake in their hired clown's rectum. You gross clown sodomizing dinosaur wannabe. GTFO.

Shadow: O_O That actually sounds like the sorta thing Hakkyou would say…

Hakkyou: Mmpf?

Shadow: nothing -_-

To Falco: I can't remember. Are you a metalhead or a gangsta?

Falco: this fo' real yo? Imma gangsta, a strai' up G, yo! You trppin' o' sumthin'? I'm actually from Brooklyn , too.

Shadow: What a pleasant surprise about your character! Too bad about those lions though-

Hakkyou: Gross!

Shadow: Thanks for that one syllable comment, Hakkyou…

To Katt: ...Let's try orange for a change. (Takes a paint can and a brush and violently paints Katt orange.) Awesome! You almost look like my cat, Whiskers. Except that you're a chick and he's male.

Katt: Nya!

(You have a cat?!?!? I'M SO JEALOUS!!!!!)

To Krystal: Are you...like...kinda like a ** here? Or just searching for that right person?

Krysta; (Stops fiddling with her bra and hitches her shorts up so that and extra two inches of leg is visible) What? Didn't hear that.

To Leon : Any luck hunting that...hot...hot...Sally Field tail?

Leon : Sigh. Alas, no. Thanks for caring, though.

Shadow: Any time, bro. (They do that semi cool hand bump type thing, with the top then bottom then pound it. Hmm. Sounds hot.)

To Panther: Honestly, dude, get some new Krystal sex dolls! I fell in your closet once, and they stuck to me for hours! Everyone was laughing...And then I killed them for playing with my recently fragile emotions. So yeah, either clean them or get new ones. Or maybe lock your closet so no one falls in.

Panther: Panther is sorry… But Panther likes a sense of familiarity with his sex dolls.

Shadow: Hahaha! I know what you mean, man!

Hakkyou: Wow… you too have more in common than I thought…

Shadow: Where's the random guy?

Hakkyou: Oh, he had to go and get ready to take his shirt off in front of me when I'm walking by him again.

Bill: Have you got something for older men or something? That's kinda gross…

Hakkyou: I'm fourteen; older means around 18-20. Douche.

Shadow: huh. You learn something every day…

To Slippy: I dare you to build something that can destroy me. I would WELCOME destruction by your hand, for it would be funny. Funny, because it's impossibly, and you're not a threat, you little pile of defecation.

Slippy: haha! I've awaited this day! (Slippy rips off his shirt, presses a button on his wrist watch and shines with the brilliance of the star Sirius)

Shadow: Ummm… Shit.

Hakkoyu: Just so you know, I think your choice of defecation was good one.

Then Slippy stood there, more muscled than anyone. EVAR.

Shadow: ummm… Takesy backsies?

To Everyone: That's all I got. Sayonara, unless Hakkyou has me stay or something.

Hakkyou: YOU SHALL STAY!! What if another man just walks in and rips his shirt off and happens to notice me?

Shadow: I'm getting the feeling you're a bit of a whore

Hakkyou: What? Just because I have ONE Hollister shirt?!

Shadow: No, more or less because you're wearing that Hollister shirt, and there are buttons un buttoned at the top and bottom. But at least you have the sense to wear a shirt underneath.

Hakkyou:… point made. Well, next up we have… Uh oh. One angry little pony.

Stralightdragon than sashayed into the room angrily, getting up in Hakkyou's grill.

STD: SEXUALLY TRANMITED DISEASE?! AH* destroys the gay author with the spell Big Bang* (Unfortunately, Hakkyou smartly side stepped it)

Hakkyou: Wow. Your first point made is that I'm gay. Sigh. All straight guys are alike.. Well, except for you, Shadow. (Pats him on the head and earns a jab in the side)

STD:-and i do not ride unicorns. they dont let anyone ride them. INSULT ME LIKE THAT AGAININ FRONT OF THE ENITER FAN FICTION COMMUNITY AND ITS YOUR END!

Hakkyou; Err, dude, I really doubt that the entire community of fanfiction reads this. Actually, I doubt whether or not many people read this at all. Hmm. Maybe it's too insulting…

STD: to fox: i tweeked your arwing a little so now you have full power lasers all the time.

Hakkyou: He… He just…Rrr!

Fox: Looks like someone thinks this story actually applies to the games

to leon : i respect you as a pilot but your attitude needs ajusting. the devil is waiting for you on the 7th level of hell.

Leon : Riight. Well, your Fungal Majesty, your unicorn awaits…

to falco*gives the Phyga belt and phone* how do you like the the new weapon?

Falco:…What the hell is this? How does this even qualify as a weapon? What am I gonna do- Strap the phone to my head and pull some prank calls?

STD: Now I must depart *dissaperes into heaven*

Hakkyou: (Frown) That guy…. Why would anyone want a pseudonym like that? Hell, His (His meaning me) pseudonym is just a more blunt version of him. Me being the pseudonym.

Shadow: let's just tear down that wall!

Wolf: Yeah, enough already.

Hakkyou: Anyhow…

Suddenly Starlightdragon peeps out from behind a curtain

ack disregard my outburst i didnt notice you were joking untill after i posted. to hakkyou: learn to control yourself i mean i can understand a joke but if you carry it to far someone will go and get this show of permanetly and it wont be me. and please dont think my stardust is cocaine i despise the stuff.

Hakkyou: Thanks for all of the concern and whatnot, but one can't state ones opinions without annoying someone, so they should just deal. Also, I have this all saved: I can easily put it back up, much to their annoyance. And if you feel so insulted, maybe I could repay you? (Smirks)

STD: I think I hear my cloud calling… (Flies away. Except one thing. NEVER BE A DRAGONT YPE THINGAMAJIG ON MY STORY AGAIN. Please, I shun such things and immediately shoot them down. Just act on character. )

Hakkyou: (Giggle) always works…

Shadow: You really know how to use that t your advantage

Hakkyou: It's a gift. Now, let's see who's next… It's Dark!! Ouch!! Dude, not cool!

Dark: there's more where that came from, sonny! (WHO'RE YOU CALLING A PINT SIZED SHRIMP?!?!) Now, I HAVE QUESTIONS.

to hakkyou: ye god man i was lol-ing (yeah i just said lol-ing) so hard where do u come up with this stuff?

Hakkyou: I didn't know you were into Loli. Pedobear would be so proud….

to krystal: uh yeah i got my question wrong last time i originally said: "do u have a" see?

Krystal: I really don't know what you're on about.

to fox: no hard fells?

Fox: NO ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU WHEN YOU TYPE LIKE THAT!! GOD DAMNIT!!! (Fox picks up the now muscled Slippy and throws him into the refrigerator t.v.)

Slippy: AN NEW TWIST ON AND OLD CLASIIIIIc….

to falco: i don't no i seen pictures

Falco: No. No you haven't.

to hakkyou: NO U CALLED ME DARK NO U EVL MAN!!1!one!!

Hakkyou: Awwww, he's getting all mad :3

to katt: WRONG THE RIGHT ANSWER WAS: glass car but thanks for playing

Katt:..Errr, what now?

to the frog: LIES UR NOT A MAN

The Frog: But this t.v hurts… My muscles are deflating!!

to shadow: hey-yay big fan!...oh god i had a normal minute uh uh QUADRUPLE THE BEEF there we go

Shadow: Good show, old biscuit stomper. Hope we meet again. WHAT HO!!

to hakkyou: ok do u under stand this?: hyatt hakkzyo i dot uder sand wat u sazz to-8ay

Hakkyou: Do you understand this?.... Well, of course you don't; I didn't say anything.

to everyone: KATTS OR DOGS!? (katt get it? lolololololool) huh?

All: Hahahahahahahahahahaha- WE KNOW.

Hakkyou: Cats. Their attitude is so awesome. They're all like "Fuck you!" and walk away nonchalantly.

Rest: Meh.

Shadow: Whiskers! =^__^=

to bill: u find-her yet? bily

Bill: I just don't get it. (Bill shrugs and looks comically at the camera)

to everyone: aha i have a new game to play! for i mit and he will be coming to a Q&A near u! and soon...

Hakkyou: And what if I convinced you toplay a different game… (Giggle/smirk)

Dark then begins freaking out and screaming for a bit. He eventually calms down.

Shadow: yep. You're definitely a whore.

Hakkyou: it was a joke. : |

to EVERY1: for ye be sad now this is my last question for now oh what has 2 legs but walks on 1 at night but 2 in the morning? next review u will no!! (this is for EVERYONE even shadow and friends so good luck with it)

(pulls out a AK-47 and aims at someone) i'll be back baby...

Hakkyou: How am I supposed to figure out??... And if you don't leave, then I could ask Wolf to show you what has no legs in the morning, two during the day and for at night.

Wolf: (Raises his eyebrow)

Fox: (Glares at Hakkyou)

Hakkyou: Just a joke!... you could do it instead of Wolf, Fox…

Fox: (Rolls his eyes) Shadow's right: You are a whore…

Hakkyou: Maybe I am… I may have to fix that…

All: PLEASE DON'T WE HAVE A VERY CLEAR IDEA OF WHAT THE ANSWER IS!!!!!!!!!

Hakkyou: (Throws his hands up in the air. And I don't mean he vomited his hands into the air.) Can't even take a joke…

Shadow: let's just check for more questions, alright Mr. Used-By-All?

Hakkyou: I'm gonna ignore that. And it's okay, Dark; I don't really care if you accidentally review the same thing twice.

Dark: Cool. Just last minute stuff sorry

to joe: (AKA: fox fighter) NO IM VENOM DAMMIT VVENOM

Joe: Not from what I've heard.. Right Mr. Man-Whore?

Hakkyou: I regret my actions.

Venom: I suppose being called Dark is better than being a ho.

Hakkyou: GOD DAMNIT!!

to shadow: i don't no hakkyous is gut busting funny when urs is OMG IM DIEING funny but both r great

Shadow: Say. It. Again. I dares ya.

that is all (runs down hi-way yelling something about a fox talking or something)...(a cop is seen beating venom badly for going for his gun)

Hakkyou: Sigh. I really want a boyfriend…

Wolf&Fox: Sucks to be you, kid.

Hakkyou: It does…. Oh, right. Thanks for updating all of the recent chapter, Shadow. Appreciate it. (Tackle hugs him, but doesn't do more than knock him off balance a bit)

Shadow: Gerrof me! I don't need your male attractions!

Hakkyou: It's just a hug.. What, are you going by Japanese standards or something?

Shadow: No, but Timid might kill you if she saw that.

Hakkyou: Pshaw. Like she even knows where I am.

The video footage then ran out, and a female silhouette was visible on the t.v screen .

Sorry for extra harshness and whatnot, people. And sorry for all of the gayness, Joe, but that hand was nasty and sweaty. Blegh. Well, anyone else I've insulted, you know what to do: Scream your vocal cords out at me. But if anyone who reads this knows a hot gay guy who lives in Toronto …. Laughlaughlaughlaughlaugh.

Later.


	16. Bitches on the Homestead

Exams are over! You know what this means? AN ENTIRE SUMMER OF QUESTIONS AND HAPPINESS!! We'll even be at the beach. Ah, a generic summer get-together area! I've noticed more people are finally reviewing. The thing that makes me glad is that they're mostly anonymous. You know what that means, denizens of the fanfiction world? That's right. JUST DO IT. I am a review whore! Oh, feed back! YES!! Not really. But honestly, I can't make the fancy wordplay if you don't send me the deep, dark, moist and juicy questions. Hmm. I'm being very sensual. Mayhap some katamari would go well with this? And for those who send me things that have to do with topics they know but I WTF all over, don't expect me to look it up. I'll only do it if I'm interested. Like a nice little known random fun fact. But, I digress. : D (Endless thanks for ShadowShinobi updating this for me. And all of the recent chapters, too. My computer doesn't approve of logging in to fanfiction for some odd reason.)

* * *

The sun! (AAAGH!! MY SKIN!!) The sea! (Ewww! What's up with all of these.. ANIMALS?!?!) The sand (Feels nice and warm… Ahhhh…) The happy go lucky families with no worries (Until their daughter is legal ;)). Yes, THE BEACH!!!!

(Insert crappy guitar here. No, actually, I won't. I'll just play some Franz Ferdinand…)

Hakkyou: So, we're here out in this ridiculously sunny… Nature, I think it's called, and the questions continue!

Shadow: Indeed they do, Hakkyou!... Hakkyou?

Hakkyou: Where… weh..? How did you get muscle…? I 'M A FLIMSY PIECE OF PAPER!!! But that works for me.

Velk: AND PROBABLY THOSE BEARS I SAW YOU WITH IN THE WOODS!!

Hakkyou; Where are you? Damn! This beach is too large! I'LL GET YOU IN THE WINTER!!!

Shadow: But, instead of Hakkyou ranting on about nothing, I'm here to keep balance. However that works out… First up is!... A giant… Chicken?

Falco: … What? Why are you all looking at me??

Fox: We're not. It's the giant bird behind you we're looking at.

Leon : OH MY FUCKING GOD IT'S A CHICKE-EN JESUS CHRIIST! WTF?!?!?

Hakkyou: I think that could land us in flames. /b/ flames. Bah, like even Bawksey would care.

Then, as if by nuclear fission, the chicken exploded everywhere, sending kirbies all over the land! In the middle of it stood-

Shadow: Daaark!!

Dark: Sup, my cold turkey mutha leaching climate change?

Shadow: A hurf a durf! Got any zany questions for us today, mac?

Dark: Indeed I do!....... Oh, right. Ahem. To: hakkyou: sup bud

Hakkyou: I've finally finished exams and I'm ready to sleep and miss out on meals for my entire summer! Oh. Big change there.

Dark: Anorexic fuck. To fox: im afraid of u now O_o

Fox: you should be. I OWN A MOTHERFUCKING PLANE WITH GUNS ATTACHED. I carry guns on me. SHIT JUST GOT REEEAAL!!

Dark: O_O To falco: ...

Falco: Yeah? Well, ellipses to you too!

to katt: milk?

Katt: I've got it. And it has a flavour :3

to everyone: yeah im bored now to my question last time!

All: Yepps

the answer is...(drum rule please)...IM NOT TELLING U PEOPLE

Accumulative groans of frustration

to krystal: SALAD!!

Krystal :ARE YOU SAYING I NEED TO GO ON A DIET!?!?!?! (Krystal gets up in Dark's grill. Damn! I love saying that!)

to shadow: ok (hides behind hakkyou) uhh er i find hakkyous a bit more funny...(gets ready to die) HIDE ME HAKKYOU!

Hakkyou: If you hadn't noticed, I'm kinda small for a human shield…

to wolf: i can't believe how many fangurls u have its nuts

Wolf: What can I say? They always go for the mysterious sexy man.

Dark: And the clearly heterosexual man.

Wolf: That's a given. Unless they're yaoi fan girls…

Hakkyou: I hate them. They usually can't even draw….

to sonic: huh what r u doing here!?

All: WE DON'T WANT YOU OR YOUR CRAPPY NEW GAMES HERE! (He esplodes.)

to everyone: well bye and remember its a mad mad mad mad world! (yeah thats my new thing)

Shadow: is that in reference to the game Mad World or the song it's a small world?... He's gone.

Hakkyou: Well, next we have… Dear God. (Nervousness) Err, Joe.

Joe kicks down the door and strides at Hakkyou, then gets all vicious and malicious. :D

To Hakkyou: you ever EVER threaten to kiss me again, you won't live to see the next second

Hakkyou: Let's just, everybody, calm down…

To Shadow: I think someone has the hotts for you *points at Hakkyou in an obvious way*

Shadow: Naw. We just knew each other since we both started making stories. Looks on with a nostalgic stare)

Hakkyou: And I don't hit on straight guys. I just like annoying you, because I know it makes you uncomfortable… (Gigllety giggles)

To Hakkyou: BTW first you say you live in Ontario , now Toronto , make up your freaking mind already! oh and another BTW you could know my girl friend because she LIVES IN ONTARIO !

Hakkyou: First: Toronto is in Ontario . Geography; LEARN IT. Second, I seriously doubt it, unless she's in the York Region. Even then, the chances are slim… Damn you! Getting me to solicit my information! AND I'M TOO LAZY TO DELETE IT ALL!!!!

To Krystal: hey smexy

Krystal: Heyyy, Mexy, as in man. (Throws her nunga nungas into his face)

To Katt: O_O what the hell are you wearing?

Katt: Well, I'm kind of into Lolita clothing…

Hakkyou: I never thought frilly would've been your thing.

Joe:…. I think I've just developed a Lolita complex.

To Hakkyou: I really need to introduce you to my bi friend... you two would get along great... with your simmilarities in CONSTANTLY HITTING ON ME WHEN I TELL YOU NOT TO!

Hakkyou: It's more or less teasing, not hitting on. And I don't really like bi people… I'M SO CONFIDENT ABOUT MY LURV FOR OTHERS, I CAN LURV BOTH SEXES!! DURRRRR!! Also, the thought of that that mouth has also invaded women territory… blegh.

To Fox&Wolf: you two can go crawl in SEPERATE holes and die...

Fox&Wolf: It'd have been classier if you'd screamed "YIFF IN HELL FURFAGS!!!"

To Jake:... why the hell are you on this Q&A?

Shadow: (Snaps his fingers and Jake disappears) problem solved.

Hakkyou: That guy's unreasonably horny.

To Everyone: here have a "fight against gays cookie" (sorry Hakk I just can't stop with the homophobic jokes)

All: Mmmmm… Tastes like testosterone fueled wars and self righteous actions blinded by fake beliefs! (All of the above is just my opinion. You really are lame if you take that personally.)

To Hakkyou: isn't Hakkyou Japanese for "Insanity"?

Hakkyou: Yes, indeed it does. If the name of the first chapter wasn't an indicator to this. Did you figure it all out on your own? We're so proud of you!!!

Joe: oh and for what you said earlier *snaps his fingers and a crustacean really does appear in Hakkyou's mouth*

Hakkyou: (Rips the shellfish out of his mouth and tries not to throw up) You suck…. So much….

Joe: that'll teach you to direct your gay comments at me. oh and that wasn't sweat on my hands, it was a girls "fluids" *waits in anticipation for Hakkyou to scream and go wash his hands again*

Hakkyou: (Stares at him, until Joe begins to fidget. His eye then twitches.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA……

(Runs off to a conveniently placed mansion bath room)

Joe: HA HA HA HA HA!

Shadow: Whoa, man… I hope you've cleaned your hands since then… (Glares)

Joe: Heheheehehehe….

To Falco: your eyeliner is wearing off again... and so is your hair gel... or feather gel... or whatever you avians use...

Falco: (Is appalled that he knows all of his hair…feather care supplies)

To no one in particular: *watches as a Mew floats by*

No One in particular: Where am I? WHO am I?

Guy: You're No one, and you're in Particular.

To Bill: I'm not afraid of you William Jack Grey, that's right! Bills middle name is Jack! his full name is William Jack Grey, his father was Jacob Michael Grey, his mother was Mary Sue Grey, don't ask me how I know this just accept it as the truth and have it over with...

Bill: Err, my grandmother wasn't a horribly stereotypical badass hero who knows everything somehow…. She worked at a steak house.

To Hakkyou: you know what? that Smirkity smirk smirk s.h.i.t. is really starting to get on my nerves...

Hakkyou: (Now cleansed) Well, I happen to smirk a lot… I have an annoying thing where I look like I know all….

To Everyone: I'm in Arkansas right now visiting family... last night I went to the lake with my cousins and some of their friends, had a party, got drunk, saw some **, and had an all around great time...

Hakkyou: I disapprove. Alcohol sucks.

Rest(Who have done so): Join the world order

Rest(Whohaven't): Doesn't seem like that good of a time…

To Slippy: you ain't nothin but a retard, cryin' all the time. I'm related to Elvis Presely its true

Slippy: OBJECTION!!! Your statement is a false! I have the document! Your honor, please allow me to bring up a witness to this document-

Judge: Over-ruled.

To Hakkyou: if a girl walked up to you and asked you to do her, would you? or are you so gay you would run away?

Hakkyou: I wouldn't really run away. I'd just get a disgusted look on my face, tell her, in a condescending voice, that I'm gay, and walk off from her like a bad ass person walks away from and explosion.

Joe: Except you're a bad-ass lite.

Hakkyou: You so funny! T_T

To Everyone: yes it is true, I am related to Elvis Presely ( Cue surprised gasps ) (They all gasp surprisedly. Including Joe.) he was my grandfathers 2nd cousin, which makes him my 4th cousin...

Hakkyou: I'm a skeptic… I don't believe it. (Ha. Let's see who picks that up hinthinthint)

Shadow: I'm willing to believe!

SFL: In God?

Shadow; nope. I'm an FSM believer, tried and true!

Rest: We didn't like Elvis that much anyhow…

Bill: DUDE!! THAT'S FREAKING AWESOME!!

To Falco: your gonna die! *runs at Falco and a tree pops up out of no where and he runs into it* ok! who the f.u.c.k. did that and why the hell would you want Falco alive?

Hakkyou; Are you kidding me? Only I get to torture Falco to the brink of death.

Joe: Fair enough…

To Hakkyou: wasup shorty? lol your shorter than everyone here you gay hoe-bagity host. lol ok I know that'll get you mad...

Hakkyou: WHO"RE YOU CALLING AN ATOMIC QUARTER OF A MICROSCOPIC WORM?!?!?!

Joe: You.

To Krystal: did you even expect I was only 15?

To Katt: did you?

To Miyu: did you?

Allof them: We actually didn't You're such a man!!! :3

To the pink frog: your a nasty pink frog, any guy who does you would get warts *sees two of the guys scooting off stage* aww come on guys! why f.u.c.k. a pink frog when you have a whole bunch of hot w.h.o.r.e.s. here! *designates Krystals Katts and Miyu's general direction... completely ignoring Fay, who is not attractive to him* (Fay: HEY!) shut up hoe (Fay: at least he didn't say) oh wait I meant ugly a.s.s. hoe (Fay: Jerk) I CAN BE A F.U.C.K.I.N.G. JERK IF I WANT TO!

Hakkyou: We don't support having a female partner for Slippy, here at Answers corp.

To Hakkyou: take off the offensive language filters, please, its driving me nuts that I have to put things in the words to make them get through the filter... (is it just me and my in the gutter mind or did that sound wrong?)

Hakkyou: I have one on…? I'll work on it. And don't worry, it's just you.

Joe: oh, and Hakkyou, I have a cat too, his name is Marshmellow ( I didn't name him...) I just want to add to your jealousy of not having a cat...

Hakkyou: Everyone… everyone but me has a cat…

Joe: BTW never get drunk then go swimming, I learned that the hard way last night... then this morning I had a hellish hang over of the century... ok I wasn't drunk I was buzzed and the hellish hangover was more like a small migrane, I couldn't get all that drunk, I had to make sure the DD (Designated Driver) didn't drink... so I only had 6 beers BOOZE IZ TEH AWSOMEST!

Hakkyou: (Looks at in horror) ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!? I'm the lightest light weight to drink. EVER. Do you know what Mike's Hard Lemonade is? Yeah. I had half of my sisters and I got extremely buzzed. AND SHE HAD THREE MORE THAT NIGHT. I really don't like alcohol, but the lemonade part in it is SO good…

Joe: anywayz that's all I got so I guess I'll stay and keep the ladies company... XP

Ladies: OooooOOOoooh! We know you'd love to stay for us, HMMUAW!

Joe: (Smirk)

Hakkyou: Well, now we have Erik (STD).

Erik: Uh, I think you-

Hakkyou: YOU ARE A HUMAN AND WILL THEREFORE HAVE A HUMAN NAME IN MY Q&A!! It's all for your benefit, trust me. I'm less likely to rip on you like this.

Erik: Right.. Well, to falco: the Physga belt grants you acces to a powerful suit of high tech armor. you can use it to cause a large ammount of dammage.

Falco: Sounds like it comes from an anime. Do not want. (Shuns said belt. WTF though.)

to hakkyou: look it up would you so you know what it is. go to wikipedia and search Kamen Rider 5(dont ask) scroll all the way down untill you see Phyga.

Hakkyou: Thanks, but no. (Examines his hand)

to wolf: *rips off eye patch* let me upgrade this would ya? *tweaks the eye patch and places it back on wolf* there now you can see onto the aural(aura), spiritual, and astral planes of existence handy for making sure no one sneaks up on you.

Wolf: Unfortunately, I'm an atheist and don't believe nor want to believe in these things. So, just a little twist here… Disconnect this… recalibrate the system, and… voila! Back to normal. Also, it pretty much has everything I need… Infrared, X-ray…. It can zoom in, scan stuff, the works. I've got you trumped.

to leon : say that one more time and ill introduce you to a race of aliens that eat your species for their rarest delacacy.

Leon : Don't get your fictional garters in a twist! I'm just trying to get you onto your steed…

to panther: i think its time you understood the pain of those you torture namely, women so gender change *turns panther into a female and summons men who are like him when hes trying to get a women* itl last untill the end of the chapter. bye all May the stars shine on us all and peace forever reign.

Panther: Hey! Panther has boobs… Panther likes this… (Another Panther walks out of Panther and leads Panther to an obscure shack on the beach, where they had, and still do, on the odd thursday, crazy narcissist sex.)

Hakkyou: Great, you just gave him pleasure. No matter what gender, shape or form, PANTHER WILL BE A LUSTFUL BAG OF ewwwww…. And I think it's time you left, yo crazy sun worshipping HUMAN, you! (I realize that people in Africa used to worship the sun. Why? OUT OF FEAR!! And that is why I mock it.)

Erik: (Walks off and sits near the water.)

Hakkyou: Well, I think we have one more- WBAAAM!!!

Out of no where, an overly muscled American man- this being based on the tattoo of the American flag on his very open to the elements -and heterosexual- chest, flew in on a helicopter)

To Hakkyou: WE WILL STOP ALL THE GAYNESS IN AMERICA THEN (eventually) THE WORLD! MUA HA HA HA HA! (the association then sees a random gay guy walk in the room and kiss Hakkyou, they shoot the random gay guy) we realize that we cannot kill you here because this is your own Q&A but we will be back in another one, and we'll be back with weapons, and more men, AND WEAPONS!

Hakkyou: That's interesting and all, but… (Takes out his cell phone) JESUS BEAM!! (A large laser comes out of the sky, obliterating the helicopter and its HETEROSEXUAL!!! Occupant)...You don't kill people when I kiss them. You'll get blood on my clothes...

Maybe someone will get the TWEWY reference. Most likely not.

Shadow: As he was saying, we now have The Pianist Soul.

Pianist: (a fair skinned skinny white boy with blonde hair and blue eyes comes in and behind him are three very muscular men carrying a piano, they set it down in the interviewing area along with the pianists bench, the boy sits down and begins playing Fur Elise) yes yes I have questions...

Hakkyou: Isn't it redundant to be fair skinned and be white…? And nice. Power to the humans. Damn furries…

Pianist: (Smile)

To Krystal: who is your favorite pianist composer?

Krystal: Definitely lady Gaga!

The Majority of people: (Facepalm)

To Hakkyou: Mozart or Bethoven?

Hakkyou: Neither.

Pianist: (Frown)

Hakkyou: I prefer Rachmaninov. (Giggle time)

Pianist: Cool. (Smiley smiles)

(plays Ode to Joy)

To Fox: yeah the "Fur Elise" was to make fun of you being furries.

Fox: Hakkyou made that clear… if we couldn't work it out on our own… (Falco walks by with a piece of bread in his ear) Well… Some of us could…

To everyone: any requests? I can play almost any song... even ones not composed on the piano

Hakkyou: How about Chopins etude in flat.. A minor, I think.

Piano dude does so.

Hakkyou: You're actually good…

To Hakkyou: do you shop at Abercrombie and Fitch? I love that store... so what? I'm a gay rich white boy, you guys are going to disrespect me for that?

Hakkyou: I'm going to disrespect you for shopping there, but I'm a rich white kid too. Unite! (And I'm gay)

To Hakkyou: yes that's right, I'm gay, laugh it up...

Hakkyou: Ha. It's funny how you think that I'd laugh at that. You obviously didn't read any chapters. How is that even possible? How could anyone not notice I'm gay from this? I have several gay moments EVERY chapter!! If you want someone to laugh at you for being homosexual, check if Joe isn't busy.

Wolf&Fox: Good job. Most people are too afraid to come out and say it… peer pressure and whatnot.

Rest: We're cool with gay people.

Shadow: Dude, Hakkyou and I have been friends since we started writing… (looks off nostalgically). Whoa. Déjà vu… WHOA SWEET! Those markings on the words deja vu put themselves there! Oh. It didn't work a second time...

To everyone: it sucks living in New York ... do you KNOW how hard it is to get from place to place? for one thing I'm small, only 14 so everytime I try to go somewhere I get ambushed by homophobic guys that go to my school which is why I don't walk anywhere anymore... which does suck because in Manhattan its faster to get around on foot rather than by bus or taxi...

Hakkyou: No troubles, I deal with the same thing. I live in a major city, but I love it! So many stores, you can walk anywhere because it's all so close by (Or take the subway for fun ^_^) … It's all just awesome! Except for the homeless. Blegh. Don't you have any friends that are accepting of you…? Or do people just flip shit on you? People don't even try to argue with me. What with logic AND philosophy combined, I rarely lose arguments.

Rest(Except for the Male 'Haters': We hate people like that SO much around here. Probably because our God is gay, but whatever.

I'm in your heaven, LMFAO'ing

Pianist: now I must depart, unless I can stay and watch, I find this quite amusing and it becomes more so exponentially everytime I read it... I'll be back... with the same name... watch for me (winks at all the guys then begins to walk towards the door)

Hakkyou: Of course you can stay. there's water, sand, parasols, your piano, fighting sessions with Shadow, the amusement of Velk's walking in at unexpected times, and so much more!

Pianist: Wow. It's like a shmorgasborg in here.

Shadow: (Raises an eyebrow)

Hakkyou: (Raises a nonchalant eyebrow)

Shadow: (Shrugs)

Hakkyou; (Grins) Well, that's it, I guess. The last review is just me flipping shit, but don't mind that; just ignore it. Forget it ever happened.

Wolf: So… Mr. Piano Charmer…

Fox: He seemed to have his eye on you.. [Did he? I can't tell. It's so hard to emote over the internet. Sigh. It's kind of depressing that people spend most of their time talking on computers than with each other. But only just a bit.] (Smirk smirk)

Wolf: (Also smirk) Or you had your eye on him…

Hakkyou: Shutting up would be a good idea…

Shadow: SHORTY!

Hakkyou: DAMMNIT! I'M NOT THAT SHORT, ALIRGHT!! I'm just average ish… and skinny. REALLY skinny… hahahaha… anorexia…

Fay: Damns straight, sista.

Hakkyou: (Eye twitches)

Bill: Hahahaha! You always have the best jokes, Fay!

Leon : Huh. Panther isn't back yet…

Peppy DO A BARELL ROLL!!

All: YOU"RE TOO OLD AND NASTY FOR THE BEACH! YOU ARE HENCEFORTH BANISHED FROM THE BEACH!! BEGONE!!!!!

* * *

Trying to mend my horrible gayness, Joe. Only because you ask SO nicely. I probably insulted a few ( Lot ) of people, so please do you best to ruin my hearing. Erik, I really mean that I'm trying to help… But wait. Are you actually a good buddy of Shadow's? I meant to ask a while ago, but my memory is awful… Well, I'm the guy who controls Hakkyou, and I say it so you don't have to endure the angry feedback. Once again lots of appreciation for Shadow updating for me because my computer flips shit if I try to log on.


	17. Waltz of the Mentally Deranged

-_-' Quick disclaimer: Shadow is a triumphant awesome guy for updating these for me. I have way too much free time, so I write… Now, I'm feeling VERY cynical right now, so all reviewers are warned: There will be high amounts of cruelty.

ONWARDS!!

Here, again at… You know what? Screw this! I don't get paid enough to do all of this narrating . I'm outta here.

Hakkyou: ……… Errr…. Well, I guess we just go on without him.

Shadow: This may be a bit awkward.

All: you think?

Hakkyou: Well, moving away from that… We have-

Shadow: Me!

Hakkyou: All right… It's cools…

Bill: It's been too long!

Shadow: Thanks, man. To Hakkyou: Bitches on the Homestead , just like you asked sir...now, we're gonna have to run some diagnostics on this here chapter, make sure it's up to speed. This'll cost you about $10 per chapter, this bill will be final. Any questions, sir?

Hakkyou: D: But…. But… I CAN'T PAY THAT!!! I mean, I have a salary and whatnot but it's not like I'd actually comply… Or bother finding a way to pay you…

To The Pianist Soul: ...You are an enigma, sir...Tell me, you mind doing me a favor. We need some more classical stuff on Q&A Madness, you mind leaving a couple questions there? I might just have a position for pianist on the roster for the Q&A Madness crew. What say you, my good friend? Yes, I called you friend. I barely know you, yet you seem like a cool person. So, what say you?

Pianist: Oh, er, well sure, I guess. Yeah, I think I will-

JKBHB: GINAT ROOSERT ATTAAAAAAAACK!!!!

Shadow: I thought it was getting a bit ordinary in here.

To Dark: ...That's fine, your opinion is fine...Too bad my fans are here. Oh, FANGIRLS! (They step up onto the stage, angry at Dark) See? They don't take your favoritism lightly. GET 'EM, GIRLS! First to kill him gets the top of my Soul Reaper robe! (Excited screams come from the fangirl crowd, and they charge after Dark)

Hakkyou: You are one sick bastard.

Shadow: Yep yep.

Fay: Hey, I thought the narrator was gone…?

Hakkyou: It seems SOMEONE was too lazy to omit those. Someone referring to me.

Fay: Oh. Okay then.

To Joe: Wow, how could you? GETTING DRUNK AND GOING SWIMMING?!?! BAD JOE!! (Smacks him with a stalk of celery) Wait, why waste celery? (Eats the stalk)

Joe:…. Celery is for homos.

To all the others: Can't think of anything to say for some weird raisin. (Hakkyou: Raisin...? Sentence distortions never end with you, do they?) No, you got a problem with that?

Hakkyou: What I meant was… Ugh. Forget it.

Shadow: ...I thought not. I'll be over there, doing shadowy stuff with my shadow. Or over here, doing shadowy stuff with your shadow using my shadow. Who knows, that's the fun.

Fox:… That sounds kind of suggestive. If you squint, anyways…

Hakkyou: I do not think you articulated as well as you could have. That was my take ona story based on plot without attempts at grammar accommodations, or character. Next up we have Erik. Oh, there's him on his unicorn now… What a convenient way to travel.

Erik: next time call me starlight to falco: no its not from an anime its from a live action show called Kamen Rider Faiz. all well if you dont want it then very well. what do you want that i can supply BESIDES me leaving you alone?

Falco: Well, you could always commit suicide.

Erik: to wolf: if you dont want the upgrade then fine but*slides a chip to Wolf* that contains the upgrades in case you need them because there is technolengy that can hide from all your sensors. its just not ready yet. oh and its invincable and disposable-proof so you cant do away with it in any way.

Wolf: I really don't see how something can be disposable proof. Look, I just tossed it over there, and it's still there. Oh- someone just stepped on it and it broke. Nasty fat lolitas…

Erik: to leon : thats it*teleports to a planet of canible lizards* enjoy being eaten.

Leon : Hey! It's all you can eat down here. You know, Wolf, your cell phone has amazing receptivity!

Wolf: That's cool.

Erik: to panther: thats it act properly to women or ill kill you plain and simple.

Hakkyou: Have you not noticed? HE'S STILL IN THERE. And he seemed pretty happy to go…

Erik: bye all –OW!! AUGH!! STOP KICKING ME!! OUCH!!

Hakkyou: YOU-DON'T-SAY-ALL!! ONLY-I-DO!!!!

Erik: WTF??? YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THE LAST OF MEEEEEEEeeeeeee…..

Shadow: That's a pretty fast unicorn.

Wolf: Darn fast, I must say.

Hakkyou: God. Well next up we have The Pianist Soul. Yes, THE Pianist Soul!

Shadow: This crowd! It's going wild!

Fox: Uh, that'sa good thing.

Pianist: Hey everyone.

All: Hi Pianist.

Pianist: To Hakkyou: so you're gay huh ;D (giggle)

Hakkyou: Yes. The only problem being that I had to point that out…

To uh Shadow I think: soo... your not homophobic? nice! finnaly someone who won't get all afraid because I'm gay!

Shadow: Yes yes. I don't really like to discriminate against people. Everyone should get along, I think.

Hakkyou: Which is why we get along so well. That and our minds are completely retarded.

Pianist: To Joe: ... Homophobic bastard...

Joe: Homosexual bastard…

Shadow: uh, Hakkyou? You're kind of setting Joe on fire with your intense glaring…

Pianist: To Everyone: any of you have a request for me to play?

All: We don't really…

Hakkyou; The sweetest sound to me would be sleep right now…

Pianist: To Hakkyou: waiit... were you crushing on me? :P

Hakkyou: Not so much crushing as flirting. I'm quite sure that you can't really have a crush on someone if you don't know them in reality…

Pianist: To Krystal: ... LADY FRICKIN' GA GA? (face palms) you are an idiotic hoe!

Krystal: What d'you have against Lady xG? I'MMA GET ALL UP IN YOUR GRILL, GUY!!

Pianist: To Fox: ? ? ? ?? takes a lot to just come out and say it? I tell everyone I meet... I don't like being mistaken for being something I'm not...

Fox: You'd be surprised. Lots of people would never come out of the closet at your age. What with insecurity and whatnot…

Hakkyou: I know what you mean, but I don't bandy it about… I have it planned out.

Shadow: I can tell from that smirk that you actually have a plan…

Pianist: To Wolf: I can see what Hakkyou is saying when he says if you were human... rawr ;D

Wolf: Hehehehehe… What can I say…?

Fox: You should both know that he's too old and that he's with me…

Hakkyou: You seem to forget that whole 'Not Human' thing.

Pianist: I had the same in my question….

Joe: CAN WE PLEASE STOP WITH THE HOMOSEXUALITY!!

Hakkyou&Wolf: Damn, we're outnumbered!

(starts playing chopsticks on the piano)

Shadow: Err… I don't see a piano in here… HOW ARE YOU DOING THAT?!?!?

Pianist: To Whoever it applies: what's your favorite composition on the piano?

Slippy: Would Beethoven's Spring Sonata count?

All: ….

Slippy: What…?

Pianist: To Hakkyou: oh yeah and there are a few people who accept me... they're mostly girls though...

Hakkyou: Heeheehee… You have fag hags! Sorry. The term is blunt, I know, but it's stll funny! Also, all guys at our age are idiots. Don't hope for anything until around grade 11/12.

Joe: What did I say?

Hakkoyu: You'll be saying "Ow! My face! He broke my face!" Soon if you don't shut the hell up!

Joe: O_O

All:…

Hakkyou: To The Pianist Soul: Hey, did you know that I've now encountered my fourth half naked hawt guy? I'm making a tally for the summer. ^_^ I'm so lucky to have random hawt guys ripping off their shirts for my pleasure in this city…

Bill: You do realize it's against the law to send the reviewers questions-

Shadow: SILENCE!! AND PRRAAAAAAAISE RIGHT WING ZOMBIE JESUSSSS!!!

Bill&AndARandomGospelChoir: PRRAAAAAAAISE RIGHT WING SOMBIE JESUSSSSS!!!

Pianist: anyways I have to go... my muffins are done! (I love Bannana nut!) see you!

Hakkyou: Has anyone here had earl grey muffins…? All you do is cut open a tea bag of earl grey and mix it in with the… Muffin mix.

Shadow: That seems oddly… Domestic of you.

Hakkyou: Yes. Sadly enough, I am stereotypical enough to be able to cook well. Sigh.

Dark: YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!

Hakkyou: Ghgashasgljhg??

Shadow:LHGLHGLHG!!!! (I don't even know how I managed to type randomly but get that result)

Dark: hey hey hey

Hakkyou: Fat Albert?!

Dark: to hakkyou: thats great!

Hakkyou: Wh…what's great??

Dark: to krystal: u do need to eat more salads lay off the frys OH NO I DIDN'T!

Krystal :AAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAArrgh!!

Shadow: OH YES YOU DI-IID!

Dark: to katt: no i ask if u LIKE milk

Dark: to fox: O_o

Fox: Sooorrrrry.

to falco: YO MAMMAS SO FAT THAT THE BLOB SAID "DAMN"

Falco: YO' MOMMAS SO FAT WHEN SHE SITS DOWN SHE GETS MORE COMFORTABLE!

Dark: to shadow: HA i have anti fan gurl turkeys to protect me!

Shadow: They… They're stopping my fangirls!!

Dark: to joe: STALKING IS FUN!

Joe: Manliness yeah. Instead of fuck yeah.

Hakkyou: NO IT'S NOT YOU CREPPRES!! Damn you, Joe!

Dark: to hakkyou: yeah i just said it

Hakkyou: Yeah. YOU DID T_T

Dark: to fox: WOLF IS BETTER!

Fox: On what grounds do you base this?

Dark: That he's probably on top.

Fox: 0///0

Wolf: He's right, you know.

Fox: STFU.

Dark: to wolf: well at least i do

Wolf:… Do what? You've gotta finish your sentences, kid.

Dark: to katt: is that milk on u?...

Katt: So what? I'm lactating. Falco and I are getting married!

Dark: You poor, poor soul.

Dark: to panther: ur ...a...woman...who the hell thought of tha...oh hakkyou did

Hakkyou: Err, actually, that was Erik's doing-

Erik: MY NAME IS STRALIGHTDRAGON-

Hakkyou: GET DOWN HERE AND FIX IT THEN!!!

Shadow: Oh ho ho.

Venom: to all of star fox: HOW DO U NO ME?? STALKERS!

Star Fox Crew: No. You found us.

Dark: STFU

Pikachu: Wow! He's bitch slapping them all! Pow! It's super effective!

Dark: to all of star wolf: QUITE TO OPPORTUNITY U HAVE

Wolf: Seeing as though I'm the only one not busy…

Fox: HAVE CRAZY MANSEX WITH ME!!

Wolf: I'll have to answer your question later.

Hakkyou: JUST TO INCONVENIENCE YOU!

Dark: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Dark: to everyone: how long can anybody fight the darkness? for do we have darker sides of r selfs? or r we the darkness? when we fight r darker sides come out than we become me brutal more animal like for do we really fight for the greatest good?

Dark: to everyone: yeah im deep

Hakkyou: Can you prove there was ever really a light? The light is just a deception- What is space when all of the stars have burnt out? Darkness. In the Dark, people are brought to their knees, forced to see what only they can see when the light isn't there to let them see what they want to. In the Dark, people stumble and never get back up, the Darkness swallowing them up silently. People strive to keep that light going, preferring the happy deception over the harsh reality: the emptiness, the Darkness that surrounds our planet, us; that Darkness that's in us, that emptiness that's in us, will ever more stop us from learning to transcend the fear. We are what we're made, and that always ends up where we started: Darkness. TOP THAT!! I'm a fucking philosoraptor!

Shadow: I think my cerebral cortex just imploded, exploded and turned into a strawberry.

Dark: to falco: YOU DECIDE WHO GETS MY BRAID!

Falco: Yo, you mean bread? Cuz then I get it, yo! I got the rights, man!

Dark: to shadow: mumbleurgoingtokillmeright?mumble

Shadow: Yes! In your sleep!

Dark: that is all and remember it's a mad mad mad mad world!

Bill: Mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad mad…

Hakkyou: Great, now Bill's stuck in a loop.

Shadow: Let's just continue without him…

Hakkyou: So, now we've got… Oh. Whatever.

Ninja: To Krystal: Hey

Krystal: Hey there heterosexual man guy stud!

Joe: Hey! Where're you going?

To Miyu: Hey

Miyu: Sup?

To Katt: He...What are you doing with that rope no NO NO

Katt: I'm just anchoring this ship… Why?

To Hakkyou: You'll hate this but I have 6 cats

Hakkyou: Pop quiz: Where do you keep your cats? In detail. Not like I'm going to steal them or something…

To Everyone: crazy time HAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA

All: Hahahaaha…ha?

To Fox and Wolf: *Puts out hand and they become forever straight and nothing can turn them back not even Hakkyou my power is jut to great now HAHAHA* bye

Hakkyou: Hmmm….. Errr…. Oh, I've got it.

Hakkyou then proceeded to imagine them both into being gay again.

Shadow: Hey! You're back!

Yes. I got bored.

Hakkyou: Good. Just so you know, we don't get paid here at DAMMIT corp.

Grumblegrumble.

Shadow: Good!

Hakkyou: Well, to be frank, I'm sleepy.

Shadow: And you're out of questions.

Dark: And you're out of people to be questioned. They just left.

And we're all going to wonder if anyone will notice the proper use of Dark's name.

Hakkyou: Shhh! They need to find out on their own!

Of course. Whoops.

Shadow: Laaaaaerrrrrr!!!.....

Dark:… Is he on an invisible hippogriff?

Hakkyou: Yes. Yes he is.

Well, things got a bit out of hand with that. Huh. I guess tea helps me write. I'll keep that in mind. And now to address those readers who don't review; I know you're there. I actually find it depressing to look at the review/viewer ratio. I may have to be sad. :'(

But I won't be. I'm just whoring my self out for more questions. Oh! Ah! Inquiries! Yes!

If you hadn't noticed, that was a joke. Because I am soliciting for more reviews -_-'.

DAMN YOU BRAAAAAAAAAAIN- durrrrrrrr………..


	18. Bill Grey's Monogamy

What's this?! Hakkyou's updated?! Rubbish! But you'd be wrong to think that! I'm back, and it appears that I am indeed in black! (Although I'm wearing white… and brown.). Yes, people who take the time to read this (Especially those who stuck through the beginning, which sucked in my opinion.), I'm updating! Finally… The reason it took so long is that I got bored while writing it each time I tried. So, just for you incongruous and anonymous folks, I'll update! And no, I don't know what incongruous means! ONWARDS!!!

To ...No one, since I'm in an action sequence: (Shadow jumps through a window. Instead of his Soul Reaper attire, he's in a S.T.A.R.S Alpha team outfit. Instead of swords and ninja tools, he has various guns.) New mode. If you didn't guess today's topic...(He pulls out a survival knife a juggles it from left hand to right hand.) ...It's Resident Evil.

No One (Because he's in an action sequence!): Dude! You shot me!

Bill: Shit! He shot No One! Quick, let's get him to A&E, Mayu!

Mayu: On it!

The two rush No One out of the room in full police officer/pathologist regalia.

To Hakkyou: Be careful...They may attack at any minute...(Takes out a tazer and zaps the zombie to Hakkyou's left. It's skin flashes as it falls down, dead.)

Hakkyou: Err, thanks… How did the zombies- ack! AHH!! ONE POKED ME!!!

To Krystal: What will happen to those around you...or yourself...? (Takes out his Berretta and fires about six shots into a zombie, killing it)

Krystal: I Don't know bout you, but Imma GET ALL UP IN THIS ZOMBIE GRILLS!!

To Fox and Wolf: Your relationship is at risk...(Turns around a fires a shotgun right at its head, decapitating it.)

Fox: Wait… Wolf, is he saying you're cheating on me?!

Wolf: W-what?! No! He's talking devil talk…

To those I forgot: They'll come after you...Ah shit...(Takes out rocket launcher and fires it into the Tyrant, killing it.) ...Okay, that one was really weak. Anyway...(Play Moonlight Sonata on Pianist's Soul's piano. A passageway opens up to reveal the Death Mask with no mouth, eyes, or nose. He takes it.) A'ight then. Yes, that is a part of Resident Evil, I wasn't trying to be a piano noob. You really have to play that to open a passageway to get the first Death Mask. Later! (Runs to a scary looking mansion, chased by zombie dogs.) Yes, I know the order of events in this is out of whack to the actual game! This is Shadow, signing off! (Runs into the mansion.)

Leon opens the door, shutting it while mumbling something about too many teenagers jumping through perfectly good windows these days.

Leon : Well… Looks like somebody's been playing too much Resident Evil.

Panther: You're all covered in blood… why is that? (Panther frowns at Leon and looks at Wolf for assistance)

Leon : Cannibal planet? ( Leon raises a non-existent eyebrow)

Wolf: That's sick.

Leon : I know, right?

Wolf: I MEANT THAT'S GROSS!!

Hakkyou: Well…. There he goes.

Slippy: Yep. Off into that obviously not zombie infested mansion.

And just as Slippy had said, Shadow entered the NOT ZOMBIE INFESTED mansion and went to have a cup of tea- sorry, I forgot he's American- coffee with Mr. Slumps. But, it turned out there were zombies in the mansion! So he dropped a bomb and came back to the Q&A place. Which sucked because it was kinda close to the Zombeh Mansion .

Hakkyou: Well, pardoning the zombies, we have Joe and his early developing lady friends! Except minus the lady friends who wear training bras.

Joe: Bastard.

Hakkyou (shrugging with righteous fury): You can always humiliate other people, right?

Joe: I'll drink to that!

Joe: To Everyone: I forgot to review!um... just a sec! (runs around looking for his questions, which he then realizes were in his hands)oh heh heh...

Falco: Ha! You so stupid, you couldn't even recognize your shadow on a cloudy day!

Katt: Err, Falco, that doesn't make sense…

Falco:…

Joe: Idiot…

Joe: To Hakkyou: (Clears his throat) pickles pizza burgers, oh wait, wrong side, this is the grocery list side (damn those women and their groceries...)

Hakkyou: … Who eats Pizza Burgers? Blegh!

Joe: Fuck you. To Krystal: hey sexy (he winks at her)

Krystal: Heeyyy underage MAN guy. I bet you were born with so much testosterone that they had to remove a lot when you was a baby, hmmm?

Joe: To Katt: getting married? to that... (points at Falco) that make up wearing parrot pigeon thing?

Shadow: SNIP SNAP!!

Hakkyou: Snip snap indeed!!

Joe: To The Pianist Soul: I never said anything homophobic to you, so whats your problem?

Pianist: Get away you red neck bleeding heart communist homo hater!! I SAID GET YO ASS AWAY!!

Joe: To Hakkyou: don't trip over that- (Suddenly, Hakkyou trips while standing sitting down and falls towards a basket that seem to be filled with womens "used" under garments, when a portal rips open and Hakkyou jumps out, tackling himself away from the basket, pulling the pin on a grenade as he lands and throwing it into the basket, then runs off into the distance.)

All: o_o

Joe: Dammit!

Hakkyou:… What the fuck?!

Joe: To Everyone: (passes out invatations to everyone) my friend told me to give them to you all, they're all enclosed, I haven't read them yet... let me open mine... (opens it) oh its an invite to a party at the lake... more beer, and even Mike's Hard Lemonade...

All: Paaartay!

Wolf: Wait a minute, this doesn't say night club!

All: LAME.

Joe: Shut up!!

Joe: To Harold: CALL ME ONE MORE TIME AND I'LL FIND YOU AND CHOP YOU'RE HEAD OFF!

Harold: I'M HAROLD!

Shadow: Oh, look, it's Harold, the local retarded whino!

Harold the Retarded Whino: WHERE'S BABAR?

Shadow: God bless his retarded mind.

Joe: To Jake: WHY THE HELL ARE YOU STILL HERE? I BANISH YOU!

Jake: You could banish me to the four-

Joe: THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE!!

Jake: (looks at Hakkyou) How about this tasty little-

Hakkyou: Piss off! (Kicks him in the ankle then sets a rabid… Porky on him. Porky… what did Porky do?! Anyways, Jake was burnt to a crisp. We don't like his kind round here.)

Joe: To Hakkyou: I just thought of a challenge: for one! one episode! or even a review for a Q&A I challenge you to act completely straight, just once, no gayness, and you have to hit on at least one girl. can you take that challenge? or is it too difficult for your tiny mind to comprehend?

Hakkyou: Yeaaaah, I'm gonna have to go ahead and say no.

Joe: To Myself: why the hell am I asking myself a question? well its not gonna be me answering, but the personality Hakkyou has augmented on my Q&A self, anyways, you respect women don't you? you don't just mess with them then be a total asshole do you? cuz I don't do that, I respect them...

Joe: Fuck yeah! You're a pussy.

Hakkyou: Dude! You totally just owned yourself!

Joe: To Katt: are you sure thats milk on you?

Katt: Someone knows how to act mature…

Joe: To Krystal: what are you doing tonight? (seductive growl and a wink)

Krystal: I gotta go to church and hang wit' mah home girls. I'm playin' Lady Magdalene at the church, whoever that ho is.

Hakkyou: (Smirk) Have fun, Magdalene. Some Christian fanatic will get this joke.

Joe: To Miyu: (examines her entire body) are you wearing tighter clothes than last time?

Miyu: Shut up you wannabe womanizer! We've almost got No One stabled! Doctor Gray, what should we do?!

Bill: There's nothing we can do, Nurse Gray…

Joe:To Fay: I still don't find you very attractive...

Fay: I still find you to be a little toerag!

Joe: To Everyone: look! its a bird! its a plane! no... its just Erik on his Unicorn...

And, as Joe did say, Erik did fly through the sky, and he was upon a unicorn. And all was good.

Joe: To Everyone: O.O fangirls always try to get me in bed you know... I just refuse because its more like a one night stand thing... and I'm not like that, I think its stupid to fuck and forget, its just not right, thats why I'd just rather not fuck fan girls... my girlfriend, yes, my FWB (Friends With Benefits) yes, fangirls, no... (in reality, there are girls who want one night stands, its rediculous... and yes I do have a girl friend and FWB's who are all girls, just so Hakkyou doesn't get the idea to say any thing homosexual about the non gender specified nature of the word "Friends")

Hakkyou: Stop it with the exposition.

Joe: To all the straight single guys: you guys really need to go get a girlfriend...

All the Straight Single Guys: You can say that? You're a teenager; you have a relationship with a girl for a month or two, then you fall apart.

Joe: not me and ________

Joe: To all homosexual single guys (AKA: Hakkyou): you need to turn straight, then find a girlfriend... ROFL

Hakkyou: You need to shut yo mouth! (Raises a hand to backhand him while Joe cowers)

Joe: It's cool man, it's cool! To Fox: you need to turn straight and find a girl

Fox: Says the kid who just found out what sex is.

Joe: To Wolf: you need to turn straight and go back to being lonely...

Wolf: Kid, I will FUCK YOU UP if you don't shut that giant mouth of yours.

Joe: (Looks at the people he insulted apprehensively)

Joe: To Everyone: MICHAEL JACKSON IS DEAD! WOO HOO! THAT CHILD MOLESTING PETOFILE IS GONE! GONE! WO HO! CHILDREN OF THE WORLD ARE NOW SAFE ONCE AGAIN! well... not really... there are still others like him out there... dammit... I wish they would all just dissapear into oblivions gate... (oblivions gate is something from a poem I made up)

Hakkyou: You kidding?! MJ was the bomb!! When he was black, but still- fuck you!

Joe: To Hakkyou: I no longer depict myself as an Anthro... you'll see what I mean when I get the next chapter of my Q&A up...

Hakkyou: Yes! The system WORKS!

Joe: To everyone: out of questions, see ya! wait, unless the ladies want me to stay that is...(looks at the angry people glaring at him) Ooon second thought, I'll talk to you later. (Runs through the door)

Hakkyou: Wow, this is the farthest I've gotten while updating this chapter…

Shadow: (Hits him with a fan) Shut up!

Hakkyou: Dammit!

???: Cough cough.

Hakkyou: So what?! You don't have to hit me for breaking the fourth wall!

???: AHEM.

Hakkyou looks round and smiles slyly when he sees the coughing menace.

Hakkyou: Heeeeyyyy, buddy. What up?

Erik: Well, I-

Hakkyou: Just ask the questions, Erik.

Erik (Fuming): It's Starlightdragon!

Hakkyou rolls his eyes.

Erik: to hakkyou: enough of the unicorn already i know its a running gag but please stop.

Hakkyou: (Stares at him with wide, not so innocent eyes) What unicorn? Surely you must be imagining it… Do you think you need hospital? You look a bit red…

Starlightmehmehmhe: No. (Glaring angrily)

Erik: to falco: no i will not perform suicide as that will bring about the End of Everything.

Falco: Yo, you think you the sun or somethin'? Get real!

Erik: You don't even exist!

Falco: Aight, Imma mess you up now…

Starlightdragon: (Raises his hands in submission)

Erik: to leon : your the one being eaten here.

Leon : No… I'm still whole…

Erik: but… but I somehow magically sent you to the parody of Dinosaur planet, Cannibal Planet!!

Leon : Yeah. That's why I'm so full.

Fox: And he's on your team?! (Looks at Wolf in disbelief)

Wolf: I didn't know…

Leon : Sheesh! Can't a guy make a joke round here? It's tomato juice!

Erik: (Ahem) to panther: okay that's it DIE!(blasts him with one-million bullets and missiles. Unfortunately, all of the projectiles missed and blew up a large section of the still cheering crowd. In fact, they're going crazy now! WHOOOOOOO!!)

Erik: good bye may the stars shine on us all and peace forever reign*dissaperes in an explosen of stars*

Hakkyou: Umm. Not only would an EXPLOSION OF STARS kill all of us, possibly destroying our solar system (Maybe even reaching further), but that's just physically impossible. You know, someone making a bunch of stars explode.

Shadow: Shut up, Nerd.

Hakkyou: That shit hurt, yo!

Just then another person decided to hit Hakkyou. Of course, he was not very pleased. In fact, he flipped shit, and there was a small scuffle, but it was all over fast. Who did he partake in fisticuffs with? Ninja, of course, Weren't you there?!

Hakkyou: Right… (Brushes some dust off of himself) Right back to it.

Ninja: To Hakkyou: why did you say "Oh Whatever"

Hakkyou: Just quoting your must clever response.

Shadow: Damn!

To Krystal: Put down the rope no stay away no stop touching me STOP!

Katt: Thanks for helping me anchor the boat, Krystal! Damn thing's heavy for a pregnant woman..

Krystal: No trouble, sister! Don't know what kinda day dreams that kid's having, though…

To Hakkyou: YOU WHORE I SAID YOU COULDN'T TURN THEM BACK YOU MONDO BITCH! YOU DON'T CARE WHAT ANYONE PUTS DOWN DO YOU

Hakkyou: My, my, we're letting our temper get the better of us, now…

Ninja: STFU.

Hakkyou: (Evil grin) tsk tsk tsk…

To katt: so you and Falco are getting married I feel so sorry for you

Katt: It's called 'love', you conceited little twerp!

To Hakkyou: I thought you hated love any kind of it.

Hakkyou: That was when I was a confused little kid. I realize this was only a few months ago, but I had "Angsty, douchebag teenager syndrome". I got over it.

Ninja: Well, I need to go and say 'Whatever' to pigeons in the park when they coo at me. Later, Gaytard.

Hakkyou: That's right you run!

Shadow: You're so promiscuous…

All: o_o

Shadow: And gay-

Hakkyou: You know-

Suddenly, a bulldozer tore through the wall, rap music blasting on it's stereo system. The audience starting going CRAZY! Look! One's foaming at the mouth! Out of the bulldoz-tron come Dark, rocking/rapping his way over to the place where everyone else (Who's cool) was.

Dark: WHAT UP, MOTHAS?!

Hakkyou: I-

Shadow: WORD!!

Dark: So, Red, you good?

Red: I'm totally good Green. Blue here is a little bit uptight (Rolls his eyes) as usual.

Hakkoyu: What?! Are we reading off of the crayon box?!

Falco: Yo, man!

Green: Yellow, how you doin'?

Hakkyou: Are you crayon warriors or something?!

Green: Pink, you gotta lighten up!

Hakkyou: P-Pink?! Oh, no way you're gonna make me one of your-

Purple: Heeeeeyyy, Green! Why is Pink wigging out? Personally, I think he should be Gold, and I should be Pink…

Hakkyou: Now they're fighting over colors?!

Red: Le's start it up!

Green: Bout damn time!

Pink: (Hangs his head and sighs)

Green: to Pink: dude going to sleep is evil -_-

Pink: My name's Hakkyou! And sleep is amazing, shut up you interior alligator!

(Side note: I'll give all of the color's later, so it'll be more understandable)

Green: to everybody: before u ask its because i punched my brother i was sleeping and he moved me because i was on the remote and well...he has a black eye now im dangerous when a sleep

All:… Why?

Green: to Orange : placid...

Orange: Don't even.

Green: to falco: OH NO U DIDN'T!! YO MAMMAS SO FAT THAT OBI-ONE SAID "thats no moon thats yo mamma!"

Yellow: Ohh, it is ON, little man! Yo momma's so fat, she has her own gravitational pull!

Green: to Purple: AND YO B*CH NEED SOME FAT REDUCTION

Purple: I THINK YOU NEEDIN' SOME BLOOD REDUCTION!

Green: to Lavender: a baby?...but will it be a cat/burd or burd/cat?

Lavender: I don't even know how the fuck I got pregnant…

Green: What? Yo man impotent?

Lavender&Yellow: WATCHU SAY!?

Green: to Silver: DAMN UR BAD AS*...and not bad because Orange was there OH NO I DIDN'T!

Silver: WHAT?!-

Orange : Err…

Green: Owned!

Silver: HE'S MY BITCH!!

All: o_o

Green: to everybody: i just like saying OH NO I DIDN'T!

Red: Who don't like sayin' that?

All: Too true!

to hakkyou: were are we going in life? and why do we go? is it because we have a reson? and if so what is that reson? is it family? or $ or better yet so we can feel hole in side? because with out stuff they say we r worthless but in most times the people with out less r more happy and the "people" u could call them r not its because the things u own u don't really own its because they own u...BAMBOO UR UP PINK!

Pink: STOP CALLING ME THAT!! Materialism, blah blah blah. With or without, it doesn't matter. You can't even prove that humans, or those possessions, exist. You can't even justify the theory of your own existence.

Green: toRed: favorite show?

Red: Definitely ____________ (Fuck if I know what Shadow watches.)

Green: to Crimson: i...seen...a...vid...that... ur in...and its not cute...

Crimson: Crimson asks for more specification.

to bill: mad mad mad mad mad mad and mad and mad

Gray: Lime! We've got a pulse!!

Lime: Doctor Gray, give it your best!

to everyone: well im going bye and remember its a mad mad mad mad world!

All (Rainbow?): Have fun with that…

Red: so, Pink, are we done?

Pink: (Rubbing his head) Yeah… just about..

Silver: I can't believe anyone would even think that…

Orange: Just chill, alright?

Everyone else settled down, Lavender and Purple gushing over her baby, Yellow, Orange and Silver clapping and shouting to Gray and Lime having saved No One. The rest joined in, Crimson taking off his shirt.

All:…

Pink: It's only funny when Bill*Smack*… Gray says it…

Just then, someone opened the door exuberantly!

Mightygreatfox117: very funny!ROFLOL

In walked a person of indiscernible age, gender and… well, anything else, really. All the colors of the rainbow stared at him as he laughed aloud to herself, eventually calming down enough to continue speaking, tears in his eyes.

MGF:...ANYWAY,i LIKED THE STORY AND HOPE YOU CAN UPDATE SOON!by the way,Im a new user and dont really know how to do anything. BYE LOLS!!

Metal gear Freak ran out of the door, giggling and fantasizing about the next cat he was going to set on fire.

Pink:… Just who the fuck was that, anyhow?

Red: Kinda weird…

Silver: Even if he's new, that doesn't give him the right to act like a school gril with a crush.

Yellow: Like you can say anything.

Silver: SAY IT AGAIN!! (Silver gets up in Yellow's grill, and the two start yelling at each other. Which is strange, because they were getting along so well only a couple of lines ago…)

Pink: Wolf *SMACK* Owww! Sh *WHAM* FINE GOD DAMMIT! RED!!!

Orange :… You were saying?

Pink: Wolf didn't take that whole "positions" thing well, did he?

Orange: Not at all…

Erik: Hey, what color am I?

Pink: This is not the time Erik-

Shadow: Splishy Splashy Blue!

Pink: (Face palms)

Bill: And that brings us to an end of this week's installment of "Grey's Monogamy".

Steven T. Colbert: Good night everybody!!!

0000

The lights turn off, and everyone leaves. Soon, the entire… place is empty. On the floor, a small piece of paper is on the ground. In the moonlight, if someone was there, they would read:

Pink: Hakkyou

Red: Shadow

Green: Dark

Orange : Fox

Silver: Wolf

Purple: Krystal

Lavender: Katt

Lime: Miyu

Gray: Bill (Obviously)

Crimson: Panther

Yellow: Falco

The janitor came in the next morning, doing his daily sweep. The sheet of paper was never to be seen again.

0000

Such is the story of… well, not my life. Hopefully, the people I ripped on will just glue themselves back together and think up some stuff that'll knock your sister's knickers off.

Hehehe. I just made that up


End file.
